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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To ask for a 24 hour truce during which there is no rape?

6 replies

Fallingirl · 02/03/2021 22:58

Way back in 1984 Andrea Dworkin asked for a 24 hour truce, during which there is no rape. Only when we have that, can we begin the real work for equality between women and men; When the fear of rape is not a constant presence.

We haven’t had it yet.

“ And I want one day of respite, one day off, one day in which no new bodies are piled up, one day in which no new agony is added to the old, and I am asking you to give it to me. And how could I ask you for less—it is so little. And how could you offer me less: it is so little. Even in wars, there are days of truce. Go and organize a truce. Stop your side for one day. I want a twenty-four-hour truce during which there is no rape.

I dare you to try it. I demand that you try it. I don't mind begging you to try it. What else could you possibly be here to do? What else could this movement possibly mean? What else could matter so much?

And on that day, that day of truce, that day when not one woman is raped, we will begin the real practice of equality, because we can't begin it before that day. Before that day it means nothing because it is nothing: it is not real; it is not true. But on that day it becomes real. And then, instead of rape we will for the first time in our lives—both men and women—begin to experience freedom.”

www.nostatusquo.com/ACLU/dworkin/WarZoneChaptIIIE.html

Today was the first day of a judicial review into the legality of locking rapists and others who identify as transwomen up with extremely vulnerable women in women's prisons.

We have also seen refuges losing their funding for not including men.

We have seen calls for including anyone who identifies as a woman or girl in all single sex spaces.

Am I being unreasonable to say that we can talk about making services mixed sex when we have had a 24 hour truce? It is not much to ask for. Give us that, then we can talk.

OP posts:
WorraLiberty · 02/03/2021 23:04

Am I being unreasonable to say that we can talk about making services mixed sex when we have had a 24 hour truce? It is not much to ask for. Give us that, then we can talk.

No disrespect but that's a bit of a pointless word salad (although I completely get the sentiment).

Even if it were possible to stop rapists raping for 24hrs, it would have absolutely no baring on the fact some services should never be mixed sex, due to the vulnerability of the women using them after your '24 hours'.

PPNC · 02/03/2021 23:09

What?

Fallingirl · 02/03/2021 23:09

I think it will be a very, very long time before society agrees to take rape seriously enough to give us the 24 hours.

That is partly the point. In a society that is so far away from that, we shouldn’t be considering getting rid of single sex spaces.

OP posts:
SittingAround1 · 02/03/2021 23:10

24 hours isn't long enough.

VegetarianDeathCult · 02/03/2021 23:16

@Fallingirl

I think it will be a very, very long time before society agrees to take rape seriously enough to give us the 24 hours.

That is partly the point. In a society that is so far away from that, we shouldn’t be considering getting rid of single sex spaces.

Ok, the linkage of the two makes more sense when you put it more succinctly like that — it got lost n the longer post. Yes, it’s a perfectly reasonable point to make that women might well feel more open to to possibility of the eradication of single-sex spaces if men stopped raping them. Only, of course, that suggests that women are being consulted on any of this.
Fallingirl · 02/03/2021 23:23

Only, of course, that suggests that women are being consulted on any of this.

Quite! I think it is deeply disrespectful to leave women, and those with expertise on safeguarding, out of this conversation. And it is back to front, to suggest we open women’s spaces to everyone, before we have eradicated the need for them.

And to be honest, it is currently difficult to even imagine a society where we don’t need them.

But we must surely, as a society, first try to remove the need for the services, before removing the services.

And I don’t see the groups advocating for the removal of single sex spaces taking the slightest bit of interest in women’s safety.

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