To be worried or am I overreacting?

[milligra]

I've namechanged

My grandson is 18 and he lives with us as his mum was a drug addict and he was neglected. My son had full custody of him when he was 1 but he passed away due to suicide. He was depressed but he just told everyone he was ok. I'm worried about grandson as he doesn't seem himself, he's quiet and doesn't eat much and he's always in his room. Yesterday he didn't eat anything I don't think as he kept saying he wasn't hungry. Today he agreed to come with me to walk the dog (he doesn't go out either normally) and he told me nothings wrong and that he's just bored. I don't believe him and I told husband I'm worried about him but he told me to leave him alone and that I'm overreacting.

Aibu? Would you be worried

You are an amazing person and your grandson is so lucky to have you. I can’t imagine the worry you feel. You’ve done all you can and as long as he knows there’s help if he feels he needs it.

@milligra

Men's shed charity in uk

Is for men of all ages and all different skills ranges,
he doesn't have to be particular talented at wood craft skills to join up.

I also agree with the poster who suggested your grandson trying out volunteering for charties,

Volunteering gives him the opportunity to learn new skills,make new friends/networking opportunity, also he can get a job character reference that will help with employment prospects such as the boss/deputy boss putting in good word in for him on paper.

Also the job centre look on volunteering work in favourable way too.

It will enhance his self Cofindence feeling productive in the community
there is lots of volunteering Opportunties out there,
not just working in a local charity shop or the confectionary shop in the local hospital.

Look up on the internet for volunteering opportunities in your locality/or further afield
also if he did volunteering opportunity further afield outside his locality, he would get help with travel expenses being paid for him and also a few pounds towards lunch or them providing lunch for free for him.

Poor lad. He sounds a bit like my ds17 tbh OP - and he hasn’t faced any of the trauma your dgs has. This lockdown has been really hard for them - they need to be back at school/college and socialising and doing all the normal things teens should be doing.
Could you offer him an incentive to walk with you every day? Exercise and vit d is so important.
I really hope he’s ok, you sound lovely

@milligra

Whoever runs the charity/charties he volunteers for ,will give him a good job character reference he can use ,show for his employment prospects.

Also if he did volunteering in a particular field in which was similar/ same aspects or is useful in some way,this can obviously be used to help get his foot in the door employment wise and or enhance his job/career prospects op.

I agree he is really lucky to have such a good grandmother as you.

Take care op xxx

@milligra

Oops sorry i ment whatever career/jobs he is interested in
whatever volunteering Opportunties he takes has same/similar aspects to what career/jobs he wants to go into ,then these new skills his picked up he can transfer to his career path etc.