Can't afford to rent. Starting to panic.

[PreciousOcean]

Living with a parent. Zero council housing available. Stuck in one bedroom with a 2 year old. I don't sleep. Childcare costs drain me and I'm on a low income. I pay my family member a decent amount for rent of a room (450 + bills) so whilst nowhere near as high as rent, I can't claim universal credit for it as he is immediate family. My eyes water when I think about trying to save for a deposit. I don't know what to do. I'm in my 30s living with my dad. I lost a potential relationship over it. Does anyone have any constructive advice? So many people I know are struggling to rent. Especially single parents who can't lodge...

Even if he's subject to a restraining order, he should be paying maintenance. I believe the CMS have special arrangements when restraining orders etc are in place, so that no personal info about you is disclosed (the CSA certainly did).

If you had to move out because of DV, the council may have a duty to help you. Ring them and ask to speak to a housing adviser. You can't live in one room in what is effectively a house share with a child.

As a homeless parent fleeing DV you would be priority need and could approach your local council. If you are fleeing DV you can approach any council in the UK which means you can pick one with a good supply of council property. Bracknell council used to be a good choice for those fleeing London as they always had a good supply of property. You will need a letter from social services stating that you are fleeing DV or a letter from your DV worker as evidence. If you dobt already have a DV worker then please get one, if only for the housing aspect. Presumably your ex knows where your dad lives so it's not safe. In London you will be waiting at least a year to be housed in the private sector by the homeless team and probably in a poverty trap as the rent will be too high. I would seriously consider a move out if area. I know its scary but providing a decent home for your child needs to be a priority and you will make new friends wherever you go.

They need to kick you out, affectively make you homeless.

You can then go to the council, they may put you in temp housing, but it's a start

I am a LL and tent out a whole 3 bedroom house with garden for iro £700 per calendar month. 2 bedroom house with garden for iro £650. You are not getting a good deal. I would move to a cheaper area and get larger accommodation before your child starts school.

I know you have left your ex but would you be able to contact your local women's aid for advice on housing and child maintenance? Some of them can help with legal and financial advice.

do you have any potential to increase your income / get a better job in the future?

is your dad able to help with childcare at all (e.g. in the evenings) so you could study something?

Is your job mobile and if so, do you have the potential to move to a cheaper area (e.g. one train ride from your dad) so that you can get your own place & be settled before your child starts school?

Op your only long term solution is to earn much more money, start looking at free courses online, and find a flexible skill which you can do freelance or from peoples homes, so as a single parent you can work flexibly.
I assume from the rent costs you are in the South East or London, so look at nail technician, masseuse, bookeeping courses.
I know someone who was a single parent with no qualifications, who studied similar, nails, etc and has created a small business that work around 2 dcs and earns her £45 per hour, mostly from other peoples homes. She makes about £30K per year plus tipsand has no childcare costs.
You do need to teach yourself to efficiently run a small business but there is lots of free info online.
It may not be possible yet but you could make a start. In 2 years your son will be in full time school.

it should matter what other rents are going for £450 + bills sounds waay too much, especially as it's your dad, what does he use the money for ?
you sound like his atm from where i'm standing tbh.
no way would i charge that and i'm in the south east.

*it shouldn't matter

@lockdownbreakdown has really good advice. If you have a social worker what do they say, and if not, why not?

I had to move around 40 minutes from my family to get rent I could afford, at first it was difficult but I drive so it's not too bad, public transport links aren't too bad either. The "rougher" area I was terrified of turned out to be brilliant. I have lovely neighbours, I made friends at some classes a lot free or cheap as it's classed as a deprived area, low crime area as that was a priority, and I am actually so glad I made the move. So don't rule out going slightly further afield, I can still pop around my Mum's for a couple of hours no problem. The difference in rent for a 2 bed house was £750 where my Mum lives and £450-£500 where I am now

Do you have a friend who you could house share with?

Don't panic op! You really sound as if you have been through a lot. It must seem overwhelming right now.

This is what my friend did. She got the letter saying she was being made homeless. She went to the council. As a victim of domestic violence she and her dc got a house within 7 days. A temporary fix. She applied through council scheme for permanent placement. She got UC sorted. She has now got a local flat and a grant for furniture. She had to keep on top of bidding for the flat and her application. The whole time scale took less than 3 months.
She is a different woman now. So happy. Her dc and ddog are happy now.
It all starts with a letter.
Wishing you the very best of luck x

@willowmelangell

Don't panic op! You really sound as if you have been through a lot. It must seem overwhelming right now. This is what my friend did. She got the letter saying she was being made homeless. She went to the council. As a victim of domestic violence she and her dc got a house within 7 days. A temporary fix. She applied through council scheme for permanent placement. She got UC sorted. She has now got a local flat and a grant for furniture. She had to keep on top of bidding for the flat and her application. The whole time scale took less than 3 months. She is a different woman now. So happy. Her dc and ddog are happy now. It all starts with a letter. Wishing you the very best of luck x

The problem with that OP isn't guaranteed anything better than a room in a B&B or a HMO.

The council may have a duty to house you, but that doesn't mean in a house or flat.

Where are you living that a single room is worth £450 + bills? I rent a 3 bedroom flat alone for £500!

Could it be worth moving to a cheaper area of the country?

The rent you're paying your dad maybe less than renting your own place, but you need to factor in the universal credit you'd be getting towards rent if you moved out. You could be better off if you moved out. Local councils sometimes offer deposit help schemes which is worth checking. Alternatively, can your dad issue you notice and kick you out?

Please tell us that the father is paying you child maintenance even if he's not allowed to see dc.

It makes me mad that a parent can get away with leaving the other parent to pick up all the pieces. I have no advice, but, good luck to you op

This is why moving out of London is a better idea. Present as homeless to a council outside of London and you wont be in a hostel for very long as long as you dont go for a major city. Let's say you picked somewhere like Hereford, you would housed in a 2 bed flat within a couple of months and the rent would be cheap. Housing there wouldn't give you such a hard time too. If you approach a London borough you could have an axe embedded in your head, ten kids and bring chased by a serial killer and the computer would still say no. Homelessness officers are brutal in london so dont go without a DV advocate.

Council team will be able to help you get into a private rental, they are the first port of call.

Those saying WTF to 450 a month—for basically anywhere in London that is one hell of a bargain, if you got to private rent and you’re looking for a 1 bed there is no hope in hell of finding that (if it’s big enough to get a single bed in).

@Onjnmoeiejducwoapy

Council team will be able to help you get into a private rental, they are the first port of call.

Those saying WTF to 450 a month—for basically anywhere in London that is one hell of a bargain, if you got to private rent and you’re looking for a 1 bed there is no hope in hell of finding that (if it’s big enough to get a single bed in).

where did op say she was residing in london ? that might not be the case for her.

£800 a month for a room in a shared house is either London, New York or Geneva!

Is moving to a cheaper area an option? Sounds like it will have to be! You can chase your ex for maintenance without having to have contact with him

Where has the OP said she is in London? £450 a month for a room here is unheard of unless it's some kind of illegal, over-crowded situation or very grim accommodation.

£800 is also quite cheap for a house/flat share but possible in certain zones.

I'm intrigued to know where the PP who rents a 3 bed for £500 lives

I'm intrigued to know where the PP who rents a 3 bed for £500 lives

I live in the north east and I rent a three bedroom house with huge garden for 360 a month! My eyes literally water at some of the prices people pay