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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

How early is too early....

27 replies

bookshop1 · 23/02/2021 09:03

...to let 2.5 year old run around in the living room above someone's bedroom (Georgian house, multiple flats within house. Wooden floors and no rug)

Is the acceptable time different on weekdays and at weekends?

OP posts:
SchrodingersImmigrant · 23/02/2021 09:18

I would say 8 on weekdays bit later on weekends.
Or the best is to speak to the people under. If they go to work at 7, there is no point trying to be quiet after.

TakeTheCuntOutOfScunthorpe · 23/02/2021 09:32

Probably 10 in the week and 11 at weekends. But I wouldn't allow unlimited noise even after those times. And why can't you put down a rug?

AmandaHoldensLips · 23/02/2021 09:34

For heaven's sake put rugs down. I have a friend in a flat with kids upstairs and it's a nightmare. She has to wear headphones in her own home.

Aroundtheworldin80moves · 23/02/2021 09:35

If you are the 2.5yo parent, I suggest the foam playmats. (Added bonus of less bruises for the inevitable falls).

9ish for playing noise.

Mrgrinch · 23/02/2021 09:38

Well obviously get a rug.

But I'd say you'd have to consider the jobs of the people below, what time do they leave for work?

StillNoFuckingEyeDeer · 23/02/2021 09:44

Ask your neighbours.

Thesearmsofmine · 23/02/2021 09:44

Well it depends on the neighbours and when they need to be up and out by. As a general rule I would say after 8:30 in the week, maybe 9 at the weekends. If yo my are the parent then buy some rugs!

MarmedukeDuke · 23/02/2021 09:53

I'd say 9 weekdays, 10-11 weekends.

WonkyCactus · 23/02/2021 09:57

I'm guessing this is your upstairs neighbours? I'd say 8am on weekdays, 10am on weekends.

Original poster
bookshop1 · 23/02/2021 09:57

Thank you, this is helpful!

I am the downstairs neighbour. The people living above are temporary while their house is being redone Hmm they moved in on Thursday and child has been running backwards and forwards for an hour starting at 6.45am every day (although I think one of the weekend days was 7.15am)

I sleep with earplugs in anyway, and it still wakes me up (very loud and makes window shake). I've been on much needed annual leave for last 2 days so had been hoping for at least 1 lie in!!

If/When I meet them maybe I will casually mention that our bedroom is below their living room, when explaining the building layout.....hopefully they'll get the hint!

OP posts:
raspberryk · 23/02/2021 09:59

Never, and I’ve got kids, no running indoors! No stomping upstairs either!

stayathomer · 23/02/2021 10:00

Oh god, I feel for the parents, sorry- hard to tell your kids they have so little freedom in their own home. I hate apartment living with kids (obviously I know it's tough for you but just horrible shushing your kids and telling them to sit quietly etc, especially when they're early risers)

FossilisedFanny · 23/02/2021 10:01

Don’t hint, just tell them .

CircleofWillis · 23/02/2021 10:02

@FossilisedFanny

Don’t hint, just tell them .
This! They may not realise that their living room is above your bedroom.
toomuchfaster · 23/02/2021 10:03

@bookshop1 don't hope they get the hint! Spell it out very clearly!!!

SchrodingersImmigrant · 23/02/2021 10:03

If/When I meet them maybe I will casually mention that our bedroom is below their living room, when explaining the building layout.....hopefully they'll get the hint!

They won't. Just normally tell them "Your living room is above my bedroom. Please stop the loud running until x. Carpets or mats would help."

Expectingsomethingwonderful · 23/02/2021 10:11

8am but ask them to get a rug and try to minimise the running about anyway! I have had this problem with kids upstairs in the flat above us but its usually mid afternoon for us and only lasts about an hour so I don't worry too much. I would be complaining if it was before 8am!

Icecreamsoda99 · 23/02/2021 10:26

You need to be friendly but straight up with them about it. Having said that keeping toddlers quiet is very hard. You must have met them though to know the age of the kid? Or are you guessing?

Original poster
bookshop1 · 23/02/2021 10:28

@Icecreamsoda99 the owner of the flat told us when he said they'd be moving in temporarily. They're very quiet the rest of the time! I think they just don't realise they're above our bedroom

OP posts:
Original poster
bookshop1 · 23/02/2021 10:29

Completely understand it can be difficult to keep toddlers quiet! Hence not wanting to be a dick about it

But 6.45am is too early...

OP posts:
Icecreamsoda99 · 23/02/2021 10:35

It is, but mine was up with no settling at 4.30am! If the family are quiet the rest of the time they sound like they would be considerate and upset that they were causing upset so I'd have a chat with them, even if you find not much changes you'll probably feel more relaxed!

Icecreamsoda99 · 23/02/2021 10:38

Also a white noise machine might help you sleep through, along with the ear plugs and at least it's only temporary, no fun for you though I know!

ChronicallyCurious · 23/02/2021 10:47

We also have a family with a child upstairs. No idea how old the child is but you can see children’s play stuff in their flat window (but can’t get a good idea of age as their flat is too high) and they used to let their kid jump around at 6am. We played a polite note through and they changed it to slightly later lol

Original poster
bookshop1 · 28/02/2021 11:39

It was 6am this morning, this time with a lot of jumping in addition to the running!

They said they’ll try their best to make it later but can’t guarantee it will improve as she’s a toddler. No apology from them Hmm

OP posts:
SausageBeanz · 28/02/2021 12:15

Before I saw your update OP I was going to say they're not likely to give a shit.

I had same problem. All our rooms (and the objects within it) rattling all day long with kid doing cartwheels off the ceiling (what it sounded like), gone midnight and early in the morning. They never actually thought to ever take their kids out to either of the two parks that are a 5 min walk away, ever. Or, use their back garden for 'running around'. I wore headphones 24/7 (except sleeping because my ears got really sore) and it did fuck all. You could not only hear the noise, but fucking feel it. Then we had to deal with the parents getting pissed and having overly loud shagging sessions at 4am - they slept in the day when kids were running amok (I know because you can hear when the adults are up and about). I basically got very ill with the stress and was genuinely on the verge of a breakdown. I spoke to them 3 times, and my partner did, and then took to texting them when it really got too much.

And they had carpet down. So you have no idea how sorry I feel for you right now. Btw - I thought there was a rule about not having carpet down in flats where you are above people?

Not everyone can afford to live in lovely 'detached' houses in the middle of nowhere like is the common mumsnet response when people complain about noise from other folk. We're hardworking people and we just couldn't afford to move.

We did speak to their landlords and they didn't give a shit either. Was quite glad when said awful neighbours suddenly skipped rent and did a runner on them, and it turns out the landlord had to do the place up because of the utter shit tip they'd made.

I hate to say it but you're likely not to get anywhere. A lot of people (note that I am not saying ALL), with kids are used to the noise, unaware the effects it has on other people, and when it comes to having to control their children or altering how they live to accomodate/consider others, their attitudes quickly turn about as selfish as they come. There's a reason noise has been used as a form of torture. If you can, move. If they refuse to be considerate, I hate to say it but refuse to be considerate back, that's the only way people like this get the picture.