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AIBU?

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Original poster

Andrew Brady's instagram - Caroline Flack. **TRIGGER WARNING** mention of suicide

34 replies

Vilanelle · 16/02/2021 12:10

Some may know that Andrew Brady dated Caroline for a while but ultimately split before she met Lewis.

Yesterday was the 1 year anniversary of her suicide.

For anyone who has seen his latest instagram stories where he slams the newspapers and Dan Wooton (claiming he is a sexual predator and a murderer), AIBU to think he is a massive hypocrite? He absolutely slated Caroline before she died, stated she was regularly violent towards her (ok, fair enough - this is awful but the whole point of his story was to slag off the press for airing all her dirty laundry when he did the same).

He even posted a photo of the gagging order her team were trying to get him to sign (before she died) and outing her as a violent partner.

I don't disagree with what he did but to now claim she was the love of his life and berating everyone who spoke ill of her...it just doesn't sit right with me.

Well apparently he is making a further announcement regarding Dan Wooton's secret sex crimes at 12pm today. I think he has slightly lost the plot. It is all a bit sad really.

He was even slagging off her friends on last night's stories. He has said he will stop at nothing to shut down the likes of The Sun and DM and doesn't care of he gets sent to prison.

Anyway, here is his instagram if anyone wants the link but I think he has deleted some stories now.

He has also set up a separate instagram purely for his "cause"

OP posts:
RunningFromInsanity · 16/02/2021 12:20

Many many victims are still madly in love with their abuser. It’s not surprising he has conflicting emotions.

I don’t think there is a ‘right’ way to deal with this situation.

She killed herself partly because of the stories that were published so naturally he blames the media for her death.

CuriousaboutSamphire · 16/02/2021 12:21

I don't understand Instagram and can't see anything there.

And I am a bit torn on this. He's one of those people famous for being a peson, wannabe etc etc, so I am automatically going to dislike his online outpourings.

However! Given that is how many so called celebs live their lives...

The truth would seem to be that she was violent within relationships. We don't forgive violent men their troubled pasts if they choose to beat their partners. Many wrote about them lovingly after their deaths, many don't.

I think I'll end up supporting him for any violence he suffered and condemn him for his public wallowing in it all! Just as I would any woman who did the same.

HoneysuckIejasmine · 16/02/2021 12:22

And here you are, airing dirty laundry even further.

Original poster
Vilanelle · 16/02/2021 12:23

I guess so. It just seems off that the whole content of his posts is berating people for doing what he has done himself!

I guess grief is a tricky thing.

OP posts:
RunningFromInsanity · 16/02/2021 12:24

I will admit he sounds like he is a bit unhinged and needs to take a break.
He’s either struggling with his emotions, or looking for publicity.

Andrew Brady's instagram - Caroline Flack. **TRIGGER WARNING** mention of suicide
Andrew Brady's instagram - Caroline Flack. **TRIGGER WARNING** mention of suicide
Original poster
Vilanelle · 16/02/2021 12:25

@HoneysuckIejasmine

Sure.

OP posts:
Original poster
Vilanelle · 16/02/2021 12:26

@RunningFromInsanity I really hope he has someone looking after him, he seems so vulnerable.

He seems like a nice guy, I think he should turn off his phone though

OP posts:
RunningFromInsanity · 16/02/2021 12:26

I hope he has people around him that can help him

Andrew Brady's instagram - Caroline Flack. **TRIGGER WARNING** mention of suicide
Andrew Brady's instagram - Caroline Flack. **TRIGGER WARNING** mention of suicide
ballsdeep · 16/02/2021 12:27

He disgusts me tbh. He was keen to sell her out, sell his story to the newspapers, label her as an abuser (she may have been) but now a year later, saying how much he loved her and that the newspapers (the same ones he sold his story to) are disgraceful.
I think he's full of guilt and remorse and this is his way of dealing with it.

ballsdeep · 16/02/2021 12:29

But i agree, he seems very vulnerable

JustLyra · 16/02/2021 12:33

He’s a vulnerable guy who was/is in love with his abuser and feels massive guilt at their death because he feels he played a part in it.

Hopefully someone close to him can step in and help

AdultingAvoidance · 16/02/2021 12:34

I loathe DV having suffered myself at the hands of a partner. Therefore IMO I am pleased her victim had the courage to report; the subsequent
police involvement and upcoming prosecution. She was not a victim, she orchestrated her own downfall. Did she think of the humiliation others suffered with her DV? No, she only thought of her own humiliation at getting caught. I am not saying she deserved to die, she clearly had mental health issues but she did deserve to be prosecuted. I beleive she knew her career was over and it was self shame that caused her demise.

NeverDropYourMoonCup · 16/02/2021 13:00

I just think that she did a real number on him for him to still be in this state now.

Hopefully at some point, he'll see through what happened to him.

RunningFromInsanity · 16/02/2021 13:14

@NeverDropYourMoonCup

I just think that she did a real number on him for him to still be in this state now.

Hopefully at some point, he'll see through what happened to him.

Sadly I think that although she was violent, he is now using it (and her) for his own publicity.
MyLittleOrangutan · 16/02/2021 13:23

I dont understand the whole thing around caroline flack at all. If she was a man no one would be behaving like this.
She abused her partners and when it had consequences for her she killed herself. Imagine what would be said about a man in that situation.
There are so many actually decent people who kill themselves because of people like her, can't we care about them instead of an abuser?

#BeKind? Yeah, be kind and dont abuse people who love you.

And as for her ex, he's probably quite damaged and struggling with his emotions, think of how many abused women go back to their abuser and say how lovely he is and how much she loves him and would be devastated if he killed himself.

SummerHouse · 16/02/2021 13:37

I think he needs help. It's all very sad.

Freddiefox · 16/02/2021 14:09

@MyLittleOrangutan

I dont understand the whole thing around caroline flack at all. If she was a man no one would be behaving like this. She abused her partners and when it had consequences for her she killed herself. Imagine what would be said about a man in that situation. There are so many actually decent people who kill themselves because of people like her, can't we care about them instead of an abuser?

#BeKind? Yeah, be kind and dont abuse people who love you.

And as for her ex, he's probably quite damaged and struggling with his emotions, think of how many abused women go back to their abuser and say how lovely he is and how much she loves him and would be devastated if he killed himself.

I couldn’t agree with you more.

I do t understand all the apologists, if the roles where reversed it would be a complete different story.

hamstersarse · 16/02/2021 14:14

I think suicide is one of the most difficult deaths to come to terms with. It leaves a mark right across that person's network - every one of them wondering what they could have done differently, whether they could have changed the outcome. Whatever their relationship was with them at the time of the death.

He sounds like a man deep in angry grief. I'd cut him some slack and maybe not

hamstersarse · 16/02/2021 14:18

@AdultingAvoidance

I loathe DV having suffered myself at the hands of a partner. Therefore IMO I am pleased her victim had the courage to report; the subsequent police involvement and upcoming prosecution. She was not a victim, she orchestrated her own downfall. Did she think of the humiliation others suffered with her DV? No, she only thought of her own humiliation at getting caught. I am not saying she deserved to die, she clearly had mental health issues but she did deserve to be prosecuted. I beleive she knew her career was over and it was self shame that caused her demise.
That post is pretty awful.

I don't think it is a particuarly good thing to do to take out your anger about your own DV on someone who has taken their own life. Would you say what you just said to her parents?

partyofsixteen · 16/02/2021 14:29

@MyLittleOrangutan

I dont understand the whole thing around caroline flack at all. If she was a man no one would be behaving like this. She abused her partners and when it had consequences for her she killed herself. Imagine what would be said about a man in that situation. There are so many actually decent people who kill themselves because of people like her, can't we care about them instead of an abuser?

#BeKind? Yeah, be kind and dont abuse people who love you.

And as for her ex, he's probably quite damaged and struggling with his emotions, think of how many abused women go back to their abuser and say how lovely he is and how much she loves him and would be devastated if he killed himself.

I couldn’t agree with you more either. It’s absolutely right that the CPS refused to drop the charges too. I see there’s slebs still using her suicide to remain in the public eye. What a life it must be selling your soul like that and have to stoop so low. It must be like a cycle you can’t get out of.
BigWolfLittleWolf · 16/02/2021 14:50

@MyLittleOrangutan

I dont understand the whole thing around caroline flack at all. If she was a man no one would be behaving like this. She abused her partners and when it had consequences for her she killed herself. Imagine what would be said about a man in that situation. There are so many actually decent people who kill themselves because of people like her, can't we care about them instead of an abuser?

#BeKind? Yeah, be kind and dont abuse people who love you.

And as for her ex, he's probably quite damaged and struggling with his emotions, think of how many abused women go back to their abuser and say how lovely he is and how much she loves him and would be devastated if he killed himself.

I agree.

I remember me and DH saying the same when she actually died.
It did not go down well.

VienneseWhirligig · 16/02/2021 14:53

He is grieving, people don't always act the way you would want then to act when they grieve.

TheCatThatGotTheCream · 16/02/2021 15:16

All I'll say (meant in a kind way) is that you often find that troubled, vulnerable people are drawn to one another.

ErickBroch · 16/02/2021 15:18

IMO he is going so 'mad' because he probably feels partly responsible. As OP said, he was constantly posting publicly about how violent she was towards him and gagging orders etc. right before she died.

ErickBroch · 16/02/2021 15:20

@MyLittleOrangutan is very right. I have had people livid with me for thinking the same. I was in an abusive relationship and if the CPS had not pursued it without my consent, I don't know if I would be alive now. I was too terrified to speak out against him, and am so grateful the police actually continued with prosecution without me at the start.