Are you a genius at handling things assertively?

[ifancymoussaka]

You have moved jobs and you are very happy for twelve months, and then a new person is appointed above you who is incompetent, very arrogant. You get on with everyone well, and you get both senior and junior people coming in and complaining to you about your new boss, about how rude they are and how incompetent they are. You cannot do much about it as this person is your boss, it is for the more senior people to sort it out. The boss has very little impact on your work because you are quite senior enough not to need supervision but you find yourself having to walk a diplomatic tightrope trying to sort out the messes your boss makes with clients, because they are also your clients, you just need to do what is necessary to sort it out for the clients without the clients realising there has been a f*ck up.

Your boss then accuses you of turning everyone against them. You again deal with it diplomatically and the drama passes over. You are now starting to get very unhappy in your job, because of the constant need to sort out problems which you didn't create.

Senior people are being supportive but it is still down to you to sort out problems. Other than your boss it is the perfect place to work. And it isn't easy to move jobs. What do you do?

Get on with it or change jobs. Doesn’t sound like you have much choice.

Go for a coup, get all the support you can push them out and take their job.

My son was in this almost exact position. He was really unhappy. Eventually he and another couple of colleagues spoke to the manager another level above the crap manager and voiced concerns but didn’t explicitly criticise him. It took quite a while to be resolved but the crap manager ( who they liked on a personal level) went on a period of leave and didn’t return.

It still took ages for a new manager to come in and sort out a lot of problems that had accumulated.

So this person has significantly increased your workload and diminished your working conditions, to the point that you are beginning to consider leaving.

Despite what you say about the difficulty of finding another job, you are now thinking about it.

So your workplace is potentially going to lose a good, competent employee and keep an incompetent one.

Usually what happens in these situations is that the decent employees leave quietly, one by one - and, eventually, senior management realise there is a problem and - finally - move the incompetent cause of their competence leak.

That's crazy, really.

The rational thing to do is to start a journal of the incompetence and how you're managing it. Also document the ways in which you're being forced to cover their role.

Then approach senior management and tell them they have a problem.

And, ideally, with the outline of a solution.

And, yes, with the skills you've been demonstrating, it sounds as though you would be better suited for the role.

But I'm, personally, really crap at handling things assertively.

I'd quietly leave and then feel cross when, 6 months later I'd hear back from a former colleague the incompetent person has been moved to another area.

🤷‍♀️

This all depends on the competence of the level above your crap manager. If they can join the dots when you go to them, you have a chance of sorting things out. If you’re looking to leave anyway, then what have you got to lose? Bring a set of fact based evidence to senior leaders - whilst you say they are supportive they aren’t going to be proactive because that means they have to get their hands dirty. Nothing will change until they can’t avoid it any more - either by you leaving or refusing to go away and passing issues up the food chain for them to deal with.

I also wouldn’t mention that you are thinking of leaving - that never goes down well. They should also be able to understand that if you’re not happy, then obviously you’ll look to move.

You are doing an amazing job but it's almost to the point of being to your detriment. He fucks up, you smooth it over. You are sort of covering for him.

I would pass back problems he has caused to him and let him show his true colours. Log everything.

I think I am partly like you @thecatfromjapan I am good at being assertive in quite a lot of situations, but I am irrationally unwilling to raise legitimate concerns about someone with their manager. It has happened to me before, though not to do with work.

I'd like to know more @MatildaTheCat, did your son have regrets, especially as they liked the person?

The story of the incompetence will leak. It usually does eventually. Then the key issue is how the manager above deals with it, which is occasionally well and often badly (usually by not doing enough about it).

I agree try not to cover for them.

I would be quite concerned that your boss has accused you of "turning everyone against them". That seems quite extreme. Does your company have an HR department? Why is it down to you to sort out problems?