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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Aibu to not have any interaction at all via social media

109 replies

yarncakes · 14/02/2021 23:39

Daft question really as it is my choice but it's getting to the point where everyone asks me why haven't I got Facebook or my ds school says if I need to access any information I need to join their Facebook page, it took them ages to send me all the info to my email after explaining I don't have Facebook and they asked If I can sign up to it! Answer is NO.
In all honesty I don't want any social media account of any kind, I don't read the news anymore, all I do is go on Mumsnet, go on WhatsApp every now and then and watch YouTube videos for recipes and tutorials.
I left Facebook many, many years ago now as I joined it when I was about 15 if I remember right! Was sick of being on there and getting addicted instead of spending time with my ds and doing my crafty bits. I gave all my family and friends my contact number before I deleted it permanently, but not one of them have bothered to contact me.
I am worried our future or any accessible information is all going to be on Facebook.

OP posts:
WorraLiberty · 14/02/2021 23:44

I'd just make a throwaway account and not add anyone.

Handy for finding out what's going on in your local area too

Original poster
yarncakes · 14/02/2021 23:47

@WorraLiberty

I'd just make a throwaway account and not add anyone.

Handy for finding out what's going on in your local area too

See thats my stubbornness I couldn't care less what's going on now. Sounds awful I know but literally majority of my life so far I've spent caring about everyone else and what they think but I just got used and treated like utter shit.
OP posts:
MustardMitt · 14/02/2021 23:49

Well, I find it peculiar in the extreme that so many people are seemingly trying to pressure you to use it Confused. To the point of never contacting you again? Seriously?

Pluas · 14/02/2021 23:51

I’ve never joined FB or Twitter. To be honest, I don’t know many people who use them — I don’t think it’s wildly unusual not to.

RubyFakeLips · 14/02/2021 23:52

I have a Facebook, YouTube, Instagram and Pinterest account all using an email I got for free using not my real name (gmail type thing). I only access this email on one of my devices. I never use my real name, address or personal details on it and I have zero interaction with anyone on either account. This way I can look at what I want, follow something, save something without having any ‘social’ interaction as such. All kept separate from real life me. If you feel you use it too much, don’t add anyone, make it work for you.

I’m not paranoid and have no issue with the connection being made between real me and social media me but I have no interest in friends political views, cousins mood updates or having awkward conversation with old school acquaintance.

You don’t have to use social media but there is a way to have access to things. I don’t know if schools Facebook is private and you would have still needed access though.

NovemberR · 14/02/2021 23:52

I don't have any social media. I couldn't be bothered with it.

Timeforredwine · 14/02/2021 23:52

Same problem here, no intention of ever having social media BUT feel pressure from relations and friends who find it strange to not want to be on any platform plus everything such as school like you mentioned requires you to have an account. I too refuse to be drawn in.

FrankButchersDickieBow · 14/02/2021 23:54

I agree OP. I'm not on Facebook, deleted my twitter when all the TRA's went batshit. Deleted my Instagram too at lockdown.

It's so freeing.

I couldn't care less if I don't know what's going on out and about.

Nothing is ever THAT important. If it is, you'll hear it from somewhere or someone.

FrankButchersDickieBow · 14/02/2021 23:54

I do use whatsapp though, lots. But at least its fro. People I actually care about and want to hear from.

AmberItsACertainty · 15/02/2021 00:12

I don't use Facebook and nobody contacts me either. Since lockdown started six people have contacted me once (and one of those was only because she caught a hint of gossip) and two family members contacted me more often. I have friends, but people put a post on Facebook and consider they've told everyone. If prefer people had a conversation with me than expected everyone to look at their public announcement board (Facebook page) for information. I'd rather have no friends if that's the amount of effort people are willing to put into a relationship. I think I'm in a minority though, being happy in my own company.

Aquamarine1029 · 15/02/2021 00:17

I don't use social media and neither does my husband or 24 year old son. My 21 year old daughter only uses Instagram and she keeps her account private for close friends only. My husband and I ditched Facebook over 8 years ago and we've never missed it. I think so many people make their life miserable with social media.

FlowerPig · 15/02/2021 00:30

My people 🤗

My dogs have an Instagram account (not a fancy one with loads of followers) and I like following the other dog accounts but that's about the extent of my social media existence.

I found it competitive/showy, addictive and somewhat depressing so why bother?!

Frogartist · 15/02/2021 00:43

It's wrong of schools to communicate with parents via social media. It really should not be the only way to get information from school. Getting information this way forces people to give their personal details to a third party. Not good.

coulditbeanymorerubbish · 15/02/2021 00:49

Wish I didn't have them, but I couldn come off of it.

itallworkedouthorribly · 15/02/2021 00:56

But what do you do if you find a duck and you don't know who it belongs to?

CodMouth · 15/02/2021 00:58

I don’t have any social media too.

mywifi · 15/02/2021 01:02

I don't have Facebook or anything other then mumsnet. I haven't had any social phone calls other than from two family members in the last 11 years. If my phone rings it's usually school or work as nobody else has the number.

mywifi · 15/02/2021 01:03

@itallworkedouthorribly

But what do you do if you find a duck and you don't know who it belongs to?
Count my blessings if it's Chinese New Year or put it on our pond.
LadyfromtheBelleEpoque · 15/02/2021 01:14

I’m glad I’ve found my tribe.

One of the strangest things I have experienced was working in a school where the clerical assistant would take photos of staff in the staff room and post them to her fb account. How on earth can this be acceptable? I said I didn’t want my picture taken by her and it was an unusual thing. Surely this is inappropriate to do at work?

SionnachGlic · 15/02/2021 02:25

No social media here except for LinkedIn for professional purposes only. And Mumsnet lurking mostly! I prefer to talk to my family & friends...I am not interested in seeing pics & posts & ppl wanting posts liked or followed...I do get given out to by some telling me I'm missing out on their news. I don't want FB, Insta or whatecer else..& I've managed fine so far.

SqeakyHindge · 15/02/2021 02:51

Don’t have FB and it bug bear that school and likes use it as form of communication, got rid of WhatsApp use Tinder instead only chat to family.

Twitter I use as not obligated to like post, I can breeze in and out and follow who ever I want

Jumpintothefire · 15/02/2021 03:15

I deleted my Facebook account a couple of years ago as it was depressing me. Haven't got Twitter . I have Instagram like a PP for my dogs and like to follow other doggies . Also I like to follow some of the fancy house interior IGs to have a good nosey.

Wandavision · 15/02/2021 03:21

Well of course you can opt out of social media forums. I personally do not use my fb account although I still have one. But I do sometimes use the fb messenger as I'm linked to some far flung relatives/and some coworkers via it. I don't think it's unreasonable for you to not want to sign up to it. But I also don't think it's not that unreasonable for the school to state they have an active forum that's widely used/very easily accessible, and they update all their info on it? You could set up an account as private, no profile pic, and not add anyone beyond the school? Or yes they could send you an email/letter but the information may change within change very quickly during an emergency and you could be sitting thinking what's happening?

NiceGerbil · 15/02/2021 03:29

Isn't Mumsnet social media?

Createsuser · 15/02/2021 07:22

I agree with you OP. Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, Pinterest etc etc just suck hours of your life daily. If they are in your name they can be used against you/ monitored by police/employers/ex friends and could even get you sacked. Many people use them to manipulate other people’s opinions and they’ve been shown to be addictive. Plus, your data is being sold and Facebook owns your photos. If you don’t want to use it, don’t use it.