To not want this fuss tonight for Valentine's day?

[Zombis]

I was up three times in the night then had to be up and out this morning to take my DM for her vaccine miles away. My children have been particularly difficult this afternoon and I'm that exhausted I feel like crap.

DH is planning on making a fuss this evening when he gets home which is a lovely thought but I just don't have the energy. I'm happy to have the Indian we planned to order but I don't want to drink, get dressed up, have ravenous sex or anything else he might have in mind. He He said he's planning on making today our best valentines yet, all things considered.

He's a lovely man but happens to be on the autism spectrum so he struggles to empathize with others. He's going to take it personally and be sad because he can't relate to my exhaustion.

WWYD?

Are the children old enough to be left while you grab a power nap?

Tell him.

@WouldstrokeTomHardy

Are the children old enough to be left while you grab a power nap?

Sadly not.

I'd struggle to dose off if I went to lay down now anyhow, I have insomnia and am only able to sleep at night due to medication. I usually sleep ok with that but for some reason last night I was up and down.

Hmm ‘best Valentine’s Day yet’ would make me feel a bit of pressure!!

That said, he’s trying to do something nice and give you both a chance to appreciate it each other, even if it’s a bit heavy handed. I’d probably be honest with him that it’ll be lovely to have a low key evening but to scale back his expectations a bit. Or quote a lot. You can still have a meal and a few glasses of wine and then an early night?

I felt sorry for my DH last night actually as he’d gone to the trouble of making a really nice dinner, dressed up put some tunes on to remind us of our early days dating etc and because I’m feeling sick and pregnant I basically got upset that my nice dresses didn’t fit right, ate all the bread and olive oil and ignored the main course of duck and dauphinois potatoes, then was curled up in bed at 10pm 😂 obviously he understood but I wished I could have rallied just a bit!

Suppose you will have to tell him how you feel. Maybe suggest having a date night next weekend instead.

Hmm ‘best Valentine’s Day yet’ would make me feel a bit of pressure

That's my thoughts exactly yes.

He said he had some 'requests' whatever they are.

He's going to be very disappointed but it's unavoidable to a degree. He's quite sensitive so when he puts alot of effort into something and I'm not enthusiastic he feels deflated.

Tricky one. It’s not fair for you to just go along with something if you’re not in the mood. I would probably ask him to scale things back a but but like say you’ll make it up to him next weekend or whatever.

I’d say if he wants the best Valentine’s Day to run you a hot bath, order a takeout. Put the kids to bed whilst you have a relaxing soak followed by a foot rub then you go to bed early and he sleeps on the sofa