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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think I'm just too old / grumpy for social media?

25 replies

Flickoffboris · 13/02/2021 16:18

I used to really enjoy FB, people sharing funny stuff / news / photos etc, it was quite a straightforward place to be.

Now (or maybe always) it just seems so attention seeking and cringe.

A close relative has set up an account for their pet and have hounded me to follow. Why, just why?!

All the humble bragging shit "I'm such a terrible parent, I'll literally do anything to get away from my kids #givingblood"

A fella I know puts about 20 # on every single post he does publicising his sexuality. No worries about him being gay but why does he have to do #gay #gayboy #gaysofinsta etc after every single post. Is it a thing now?

Throw in all the huns trying to sell candles, all the hospital check ins, and the covidiots waving their flags and I'm done.

Is social media now boring and cringy and shit, or has it always been thus and I've just become a curmudgeon?

OP posts:
Okokokbear · 13/02/2021 16:20

Yeah sounds like your probably are.

SchrodingersImmigrant · 13/02/2021 16:20

The hashtags are because they share from instagram.

I don't have any of this. I have like 40 friends or so and brutally delete anyone who tries to sell me something or does check in in a hospital with sad face and "don't eanna talk about it".

I love my insta feed tbh

Bagelsandbrie · 13/02/2021 16:23

I hate it now as well. I used to like it when you just kept Facebook to a small group of people you actually knew and used it like a little scrapbook / photo album just sharing odd photos and captions etc. That’s how I still use mine. Now everyone makes everything public. I can’t stand it. I hate replying on anything anyone posts now as I never know if it’s public or not and I can’t be bothered to check every time I want to reply so now I just don’t bother.

SchrodingersImmigrant · 13/02/2021 16:25

@Bagelsandbrie

I hate it now as well. I used to like it when you just kept Facebook to a small group of people you actually knew and used it like a little scrapbook / photo album just sharing odd photos and captions etc. That’s how I still use mine. Now everyone makes everything public. I can’t stand it. I hate replying on anything anyone posts now as I never know if it’s public or not and I can’t be bothered to check every time I want to reply so now I just don’t bother.
Just look at the icon next to the time. Planet - public 2 people - friends
littlepattilou · 13/02/2021 16:34

@Flickoffboris Agree. I have only been on facebook 2 or 3 times this year.

And to add to what you have said, may I offer FIVE bloody facebook invites, for the bastard Body Shop At Home. (In the last 3 weeks!) In addition, 2 women in my road (who don't speak much only just wave and say hello,) tried to drag me into this hideous MLM. I declined, and said I don't like Body Shop stuff, and legged it before they could continue.

On facebook, the 5 women on there have invited me over and over again. It's pissing me off so much that I am thinking of deactivating my facebook.

Why are people taken in by this shit? Confused

And are The Body Shop (who have changed owners I believe,) on a recruitment drive or something? Confused

SchrodingersImmigrant · 13/02/2021 16:39

@littlepattilou be brutal. Block them.
And yes..they are on recruitment drive for their little mlm crap. Block, block, block

TwoZeroTwoZero · 13/02/2021 16:57

I mainly use it for the groups. I post on my own page about things that I think are funny or things that have annoyed me but I do occasionally show off, for example when some of my baking turned out great or I did well in a competition etc. I unfollow the ones who do my head in.

The wall-to-wall ads are doing my tits in at the moment. I keep hiding them all, I don't use the app (I can't delete it but it's disabled and all the permissions are off) and I use DuckDuckGo as my phone's web browser so I don't think it can track me through my cookies but still the ads pop up. It's forcing me to use it less.

littlepattilou · 13/02/2021 17:00

Thanks @SchrodingersImmigrant

It's most peculiar. I have been on facebook for 11 years, and it's only this past few weeks, that these 5 people have been sending 'Body Shop at Home' invites. They are; an ex colleague of my daughter, an ex colleague of mine, one of my cousin's mates, DH's second cousin who lives 100 miles away (and we only see once or twice a year,) and a friend of mine who used to live in my village and left in 2018.

And on the facebook feeds of these 5 women, I would say 7 out of every 10 posts is about Body Shop at Home. 'Hey, you TOO can win a raffle prize, just message me your personal details blah blah blah,' and 'Hey girlz, you TOO can get £200 worth of products for £49, and start YOUR own business, just like me!'

Oh, and the sickly-sweet and vom-worthy picture of them, with a certificate they printed off, with 'Rachel you did so well this week! You won a mini bottle of hand-gel' (sent to her from whoever is further up in the ladder!')

The worrying thing is, I have been researching this today, and there are a load of stories online about women - usually young mums - being taken in by shit like this, and losing several thousand pounds. They have a financial target to meet, and if they don't meet it, they have to put the money in themselves.

There was a similar storyline on Coronation Street a month or so back, where Gemma was taken in by a company doing something similar (that Sean the barman had roped her into.) She was hounded and bullied by a woman further up the 'ladder' who said she OWES them £400, and she had only made £100! So the other £300 had to come out of her pocket.

The woman said to Gemma 'you signed a contract! You HAVE to pay this money!'

And as I say, many women in real life have had this happening too.

Even some women who had not lost money, said for the last 6 months, they had been working some 25-30 hours a week, (including time spent on social media, promoting it,) and only made £300 in that 6 months! Shock

Awful Should be banned.

SchrodingersImmigrant · 13/02/2021 17:04

It absolutely should @TwoZeroTwoZero
Basically they now need to sell and hire to try to recoup costs. Which one would think many did by pushing the "donate hand creams for NHS" ("I need to get rid of xmas stuff so pleeeeeease buy them)...

SchrodingersImmigrant · 13/02/2021 17:05

Tbh I am just gobsmacked that at this time and age with SO MUCH written on these mlm so many people atill do it☹️

BlueTimes · 13/02/2021 17:06

I think social media is fine as long as you delete or unfollow those who irritate.

MrsTerryPratchett · 13/02/2021 17:07

A fella I know puts about 20 # on every single post he does publicising his sexuality. No worries about him being gay but why does he have to do #gay #gayboy #gaysofinsta etc after every single post. Is it a thing now?

I can't stand this. Fucking mindless bollocks. I have two people who do it and they both seem vacuous and self obsessed. They're perfectly nice in RL.

tootsytoo · 13/02/2021 17:07

Totally agree OP, literally a second ago I just saw the most cringeworthy valentines video you could imagine. So attention seeking it's unreal, but I just turn it off when it pisses me off.

Anyone posting that kind of rubbish is just totally insecure, so if it makes them happy and secure then leave them to it.

Pinkblueberry · 13/02/2021 17:07

I find it annoying too, but when people annoy me I snooze them for 30 days, if they continue to annoy me then I unfollow. You don’t have to see it on your feed.

littlepattilou · 13/02/2021 17:08

@SchrodingersImmigrant

Tbh I am just gobsmacked that at this time and age with SO MUCH written on these mlm so many people atill do it☹️
Me too. Sad As I said, it is largely younger women too. (Like 17-30.) Maybe they are not as wise to them as people say, over 40 and older.
Beyondfedupnow · 13/02/2021 17:10

I had been getting quite friendly with a man, lots of texting, phone calls, dog walks etc. Found out he follows a lot of half naked women less than half his age on Instagram. Yuck. I’m not controlling in any way, if anything I’m passive but I’m not ‘cool’ enough to be ok with it, it gave me instant ick.
I don’t have any social media apart from mumsnet. It seems to be more trouble than it’s worth. Lots of aggression, nastiness and attention seeking.

SchrodingersImmigrant · 13/02/2021 17:13

@BlueTimes

I think social media is fine as long as you delete or unfollow those who irritate.
Yup. As i said. Be brutal.

There are so many amazing things in there, I won't be missing out on them just because I don't control dickhead's access😁

Whenwillow · 13/02/2021 17:17

Boring and cringy and shit, mainly. YANBU

Picklypickles · 13/02/2021 17:17

I've only got family and a couple of close friends on FB, and to be fair I miss most of their posts because as soon as I log in I only scroll down a couple of posts before I get bored and start playing games!

littlepattilou · 13/02/2021 17:44

@Flickoffboris

A fella I know puts about 20 # on every single post he does publicising his sexuality. No worries about him being gay but why does he have to do #gay #gayboy #gaysofinsta etc after every single post. Is it a thing now?

I hate this too. Happens a lot of twitter too.

See also: VEGANS. Always feel the need to tell everyone what they are. EVERY DAY!

1Morewineplease · 13/02/2021 17:52

I haven't done FB or Insta for years.
Got a bit of stick when I initially stopped but folk don't bother with me anymore.
So glad that I'm not MLM'd or subjected to a photo of a baby that I'll never meet, nor their parents which had "47+" on the first image! There are only a small number of poses of a baby , with a stupid hair band ( it has barely any hair) and a stupid ponytail of three or so strands that I can cope with seeing.
I am liberated!
When I do see friends, almost the first thing they say is " oh yeah, I forgot you're not on FB!!!"

Flickoffboris · 13/02/2021 21:57

So glad it's not just me who is a bit embarrassed for / baffled by lots of SM users.
Now the question is... Why won't I just take myself off there?! It's a bit like car crash TV, you don't really want to look, but are compelled

OP posts:
SchrodingersImmigrant · 13/02/2021 22:17

It's a bit like car crash TV, you don't really want to look, but are compelled
Lol, that's what I said about Tiger King😂😂😂

Make your sm your. Hide posts from annoying people or unfriend them. Start following pretty and happy things. Museums and national trust are great! Artists and nature photographers always brighten my day.

Brefugee · 13/02/2021 22:20

If people are too weak or too scared of "fallout" to unfollow people, then probably SM isn't for them

Unfollow. Unfollow and block the ones who really give you grief
(and all the hashtags as pp said are for the instagram posts. just ignore)

Skysblue · 13/02/2021 23:20

You’re in the wrong bit. Unfollow all the annoying people on fb (they won’t know as you stay friends) and follow stuff you’re interested in. My fb feed is full of beautiful nature scenes, artists, cute animals doing funny things and professional groups where I’m learning a lot. I adore fb! But yeah not interested in the stuff my friends post, is mostly v dull/boasty.

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