Porn use....worrying?

[QueryingA]

My DH watches porn occasionally and tbh (rightly or wrongly)I don't have a problem with this. It's the pornhub app on his phone.

However our sex life has plummeted recently, possibly to do with the boredom of lockdown. Then I saw on his phone when I was checking battery use (he asked me to) that you can actually see what Apps are used most and for exactly how long. He wasn't aware of this feature so I didn't highlight this fact, but I saw he had been on Pornhub for 55 minutes, probably when I was at work as he would never watch when I'm around.

This seems an extraordinary length of time and now I'm suspicious. WTAF could he be doing to spend that long on there?? Other time it has been 10 mins or so but there's a few times it's for a long time and now I'm suspicious, especially with his recent lack of interest in me.

Advice anyone?

I think cam girls are a paid for service so perhaps check statements. But yeah, does sound like a link.

It is no wonder your sex life is plummeting. That tends to happen with men who stop thinking of sex as an act of loving intimacy with their partner, but something they 'consume' instead. Personally I could never, ever stay with a man who consumes pornography. It is so disrespectful to women, and the porn nowadays is overwhelmingly violent and misogynistic. Tell him you want him to stop, and devote his attentions to you

An0n0n0n

But how do I check his personal bank statements?

Never mind whether he has spent money on porn, his use of porn and the pressure/coercion/abuse that has gone into some of what he watches makes it unacceptable. Is not PornHub the site recently that has had issues with underage girls/young women being on their site and withdrawn some of their content?

Have you tried talking to him about your sex life and his use of porn? What does he say?

It may be take him longer to seek out the content he gets his rocks off to, considering 80% of material has been removed recently due to the content being of underage children /women being raped/women unconscious.

Typical of MN that the assumption is that he is looking at underage girls or that all porn is definitely abusive. Baffling how people who never ‘consume’ porn seem to be absolute experts on all aspects of porn

OP I wouldnt be particularly concerned. Could be a number of reasons for the time. He’s probably just looking at very bland stuff to be honest. However rather than jump to conclusions (leave that for the other posters who’ll be frothing at the mouth at your healthy attitude to porn) just ask him.

Typical of MN that the assumption is that he is looking at underage girls or that all porn is definitely abusive

The OP was specific. Pornhub.
Article from December 2020

You have absolutely no idea what you’re watching on most mainstream sites. You do t need to “consume” porn to know that, you just need to give a shit about women and girls.

Well, if pornhub removed the alleged videos then he is not using it to access said videos, is he.

Further it was ALLEGED videos. They removed all videos by unverified posters regardless. The article is a bit misleading as it implies around 3 quarters of all the videos included children or abuse and that is not the case. It would see that pornhub has taken action and the website and a user is LESS likely to see inappropriate/illegal videos on there now

I think I’m a bit guilty of derailing here...

OP I would t be concerned but ask you partner if you have concerns. You should be able to talk about this, surely

I mean, I could post a stack of other stuff Shannon, but I can already tell you’re not interested in listening 🤷🏻‍♀️

@SmileEachDay

I mean, I could post a stack of other stuff Shannon, but I can already tell you’re not interested in listening 🤷🏻‍♀️

Thanks for the offer, but you are right, I’m not interested.

OP - Shannon is a great example. People get very committed to their porn use and will tie themselves in knots to justify it, regardless of the consequences.

I’d lay money on this happening if you challenge your partner.

OP I wouldnt be particularly concerned.

Why would the below not be concerning?

However our sex life has plummeted recently, possibly to do with the boredom of lockdown.