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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Playing with dolls in Year 8

111 replies

lpsandmore · 12/02/2021 19:55

My DD is 12- 13 in April and currently in Y8. She has always loved role play and little toys. She's very creative and excels at art, not so much academics. One of the toys she was absolutely obsessed with when she was younger was LPS. The littlest pet shop toys. She would spend all her money on it etc. Around Y6 she stopped playing with them as the girls all got very grown up and it wasn't very cool. She sold a lot of her LPS and we never really looked back.
She's never really got 'stuck' into all the secondary school pressures and drama as 1st lockdown happened March of y7 when they were just settling down. This has meant she has gradually got back into playing with LPS. By play, I mean completely engrossed in it. They have got very expensive now and she has just spent £100 of her own money on a massive bundle of them, plays role play with them, makes role play videos etc etc. There are tons of youtubers (fully grown adults) who make role play videos etc and she watches them in between zoom lessons. She has some friends who know about this but is generally very very secretive and embarrassed. I regularly check her phone and can see the types of convos her friends are having, none are toy related obv. My question is, is this strange? Does anyone else have a not so little toy obsessed child? Should I be worried?

OP posts:

Itsjustaride8w737 · 12/02/2021 21:44

I pretend to buy my cousin a baby doll when I was 15, it was secretly for me.

I used to hold it and put it to bed, i wouldn't of dared tell anyone as i knew they'd take the piss.

Lasted about a year then i got bored. I'm normal i promise!

LadyOfTheFlowers · 12/02/2021 21:49

I secretly loved my Barbie dolls until I was around 14 😳

Toocold · 12/02/2021 21:50

I think it’s lovely, my year 8 had pinched the younger siblings magnatiles today and my year 11 insists we need cup cake making kits ( Peppa pig ones) for the youngest and a Hobbycraft rocket to decorate in the half term, both are well adjusted and have plenty of friends, the year 11 would probably try and rope her friends in if it wasn’t lockdown, usual teenagers in every other way.

DoTheNextRightThing · 12/02/2021 21:51

It sounds like it makes her happy, and that's what's important! She is probably concerned about being made fun of, but if it's something she does at home and the girls at school don’t know then it should all be fine.

CutePixie · 12/02/2021 21:52

@gavisconismyfriend

Not unusual for all of us to revert back to things that are familiar and bring us comfort. Middle of a pandemic and hormones kicking in at the same time, must be hard being a young teen just now. Perhaps the escapism helps...

I was thinking this. Lots of teens and adults play role playing video games or get creative with Lego, but I understand the stigma around dolls. Better this than getting involved with boys

Keyperfect · 12/02/2021 21:54

I also think it's lovely and I have happy memories of playing with dolls/ Barbies/MLPs etc up to age 14, with my younger sisters. I have a 10 y.o. DD who has never really been into this kind of imaginative play, (or not since about age 3 or 4), and I do feel she has missed out!

diamondpony80 · 12/02/2021 21:56

My son was like this with his Thomas wooden railway collection. Lots of role playing and story telling. They're put away now, but I think if he ever had kids of his own he'd love to resurrect them.

Destinyknown · 12/02/2021 21:56

When I was a kid I spent hours and hours on my own with dolls, creating doll houses, and did animation and animation sets all out if cardboard and scraps I could find. I also spent hours creating clothes for dolls and myself.
I was in secondary school. I was arty and absolutely loved the escapism of it.
It's creative, it's great that your daughter isn't on screen time and fixated to social media.

neonjumper · 12/02/2021 22:00

Not strange at all, my now almost 18 year old was playing with MLP till she was 15/16... a real stress relief in the lead up to exams.

She made animated films with them featuring very creative storytelling, which she used to upload on YouTube.

She also went through a phase of repairing squishies and uploading on YouTube .

She didn't share this with her friends but her friends would come round and play with "her younger sisters " MLP's .

I think the trend of adult you tubers "playing " with these toys has made it more acceptable.

Serin · 12/02/2021 22:00

Aww, she sounds sweet and let's face it, there's precious little else to do. My 60yr old DH still gets out his old matchbox cars out occasionally "to check them over"

Miltonj · 12/02/2021 22:00

Me and my best friend were still playing make believe games up we were 17! We were also into boys, make up, drinking and all the other normal teenage stuff at the same time.
I like to think we're both well adjusted adults now!

Please don't worry! And don't make her feel weird about it, it's so, so normal

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 12/02/2021 22:01

Sounds really great that she’s using her imagination!

sneakysnoopysniper · 12/02/2021 22:03

I would not be concerned about your child. As you say she is socially aware but just has a part of her life she does not share with her peer group. I would regard that as a sign of strength and individuality.

I was a secretive imaginative child and played with dolls until 14! Even after that I continued to make clothes for my sisters dolls. My parents did find it strange but this was back in the 1950s when kids were still kids. Ive always been interested in the history of costume. Now I sell vintage costume accessories for a living. So in a way I never "grew out" of it. Nor have I ever cared very much what my peer group thought.

LouNatics · 12/02/2021 22:08

Toys are fun.

People like fun.

Most people have some toys, even if they don’t think of them as such.

Age doesn’t matter.

The work of teenager hood is to distance yourself from childish things. It’s actually very mature to realise actually, you like childish things and it doesn’t make you a child. Many of us are in our 20s or 30s before we work that out,

SpiderinaWingMirror · 12/02/2021 22:09

I think it's wonderful. Good for her. Adulthood goes on for bloody ever imho!

Pugdoglife · 12/02/2021 22:12

Sounds perfectly healthy to me. She's using it as a creative hobby which takes her back to happy times. She obviously knows where boundaries are so doesn't set herself up for teasing by telling her friends.
There are many adults playing games with little figures and collectables who get engrossed by their hobby.

Ultimately if it keeps her happy, at a time when many people are struggling with mental health I'd leave her to it.

Hankunamatata · 12/02/2021 22:24

Id be delighted she isn't tech obsessed. Really common for non NT kids to have obsessive hobbies that aren't mainstream

Gobbeldegook · 12/02/2021 22:25

If it's any consolation in my class the popular mean girl was nocked up at 16 and is currently a single parent to 4 and living on benefits. The ' geek' who played with toys at 15 runs his own successful IT buisness. It's important to be yourself

Bandino · 12/02/2021 22:27

Sounds a lovely girl.

Embroideredstars · 12/02/2021 22:33

Sounds fine to me. I used to play with my sindy dolls when I was that age, wouldn't have admitted it to anyone and the play was a bit more developed ie they married my brother's action man but still just innocent play.

My ds 9 has gone back to a lot of his younger toys this last year and I think it's fine is a safe space for them in these uncertain times. We were having full on teddy bears tea parties in the warmer weather.

I even tried looking for some more octonauts toys for him as he got back on to the show again and regretted giving away the ones he did have. As do I now! Trying to buy them back is expensive, I asked on here actually one poster was massively scathing about a 9 yr old wanting them but they can get stuffed, I k ew it would make him happy and he is still young enough for toys both in age and mindset, he is also creative and does some really imaginative things with things like Lego.

Carrottop73 · 12/02/2021 22:34

Your daughter sounds lovely and not strange at all.

She has a long life to do boring grown up. She sounds very happy, creative and individual.

borageforager · 12/02/2021 22:37

My Y8 still plays Sylvanians with my Y4. She even asked for Sylvanians for Christmas, which I was surprised by!

Embroideredstars · 12/02/2021 22:40

@Keyperfect

My older ds is like this, old for his age, without much imagination, when I think about it he never really played as a child with toys unless I played with him and he has never really enjoyed reading novels himself either. Lego was built and put on the shelf. Was desperate to grow up and have tech.

I feel like he missed out too and he doesn't have the safety of escapism from everyday crap his brother has.

m0therofdragons · 12/02/2021 22:45

My Dd is year 8 and pretends she cool but is always happy to play with her 9 year old sisters. I think lockdown has reduced the pressure to grow up a bit.

elliejjtiny · 12/02/2021 22:56

I think it's fine. My son is the same age and he makes animation videos with toy cars.

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