To be unable to think for worry - CEV parent tested positive for Covid

[tututastic]

Hi all,
Sorry for posting in AIBU, I've received really great support here before and I'm hoping someone might be able to advise on my situation. My DF is CEV. He is over 70 and in addition was diagnosed with a Stage 4 lymphatic system cancer in 2019. He finished his treatment in July 2020 and has was told he was CEV thereafter.

He lives alone in a different country which is currently on the governments restricted travel list, although DB is in a different city in the same country. He has just tested positive for Covid. Having been told for a year how his chances for recovery are non-existent if he contracts covid, I cant seem to find any advice on what to do now. Understandably, HCPs in the UK wont give me advice as I am not the patient/ the patient is not in the UK. However, not sure if there is anything I can do? I am so sick with worry. I'm struggling to function at work. I have a DD5 at home and its taking all my effort just to care for her. I feel like I'm just sitting here waiting for the worst. If anyone has been in this situation or has any advice I would be so grateful.

I'm sorry this is happening OP, it's so hard for you. Do you get on with db, will he report to you on what is happening? Is he in hospital? As there would be nothing to stop you phoning the medical staff there for updates. I imagine it is a waiting game but very very difficult. Are you work understanding?

I'm so sorry, I can't imagine the fear which is totally understandable. Can you get him on a video call? See how he's doing? Hopefully he'll have a very mild dose - what led to him getting tested?

This or other guides might be helpful to have a read of www.cdc.gov/coronavirus/2019-ncov/if-you-are-sick/care-for-someone.html

I'm sorry that you have to deal with this from so far away. There is no benefit from you worrying night and day so you are going to need to agree times to check in with him and your brother and an emergency action plan and then try to look after yourself get on with normal life and distract yourself. If you can get a pulse oximeter to him if he is able to take basic readings that might help establish when to seek urgent medical advice.

That's assuming he is at home not in hospital care.

I just want to say sadly lots of CEV have died from Covid but others were very high risk and sailed through it. Thinking of you

@DaisyDreaming

I just want to say sadly lots of CEV have died from Covid but others were very high risk and sailed through it. Thinking of you

This (I am CEV).

Europe's oldest person (116) has just recovered from Covid.

www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-56005488

Sorry for your troubles, and good luck. 💐

@ScrapThatThen thank you, I've sent an order to a local pharmacy and he will have one by the evening. Thank you for the guidance as well, in my panic I was struggling to find something like that.

Was he told that he would die from it last year during treatment? A lot has changed since then. Treatment pathways, if needed at all have improved. I'm CEV, Covid wasn't as bad the worst chest infection I've had. As said many CEV people have sailed through it, even more have just needed antibiotics or a bit of oxygen support. Did you have strategies for staying positive during his Cancer? Start them again.

Thank you @DaisyDreaming @Hopeisnotastrategy that is very reassuring to hear

@soddingweddings he went in to his doctor for treatment for an unrelated disorder. It wasnt life threatening but treatment hadnt been possible since his cancer diagnosis and it was getting to a critical point. He developed symptoms a couple of days later and was recommended to get a test.

@ItsIgginningtolooklikelockdown I'm reticent to mention it, to be honest. I took unpaid leave to travel to him when he was first diagnosed and have to take additional time for bereavements since. Since I cant travel, I havent mentioned it to work but perhaps I should?