I grew up with my grandparents. My grandfather didn't seem to like me much a lot of the time, had terrifying rages when I was very young and then mostly a sort of very faint contempt. Later at about 14 I asked him if he loved me like his daughters and he said no. I knew anyway.
But was very good in many ways, providing a nice home, good education, spent hours driving me to faraway school come rain hail or shine. I had a serious illness as a child and sometimes he could be great, but others he would shout at me to stop crying on the way to the hospital.
I don't usually think of it much nowadays, but feel a bit low with mental health at the moment. I have a harsh inner critic that is very savage towards myself at times, and I think it stems from my grandfather's attitude. I look at young kids sometimes and can't imagine how an adult could be cold or contemptuous towards them - it upsets me.
AIBU? Am I being a bit of a princess here?