To put off TTC because of exhaustion?

[AryaStork]

I'm so exhausted at the moment because of work but I can't see that changing in the next few years. Changing jobs isn't an option as tbh I love my job but it's just exhausting. DH and I aren't getting any younger. I think I'm just really scared of the added exhaustion from pregnancy. I'm BU aren't I?

Crack on, TTC can potentially take years so dont waste time.

I found my first pregnancy fairly easy until 36 weeks onwards, second pregnancy I found the aches and fatigue started much earlier. Probably a mix of being older, ligaments already damaged from first and having a 3 year old to take care of as well as working. I found maternity leave easy too. If you return to work before DC is regularly sleeping through the night I imagine that's the most exhausting phase. My DC were both very good sleepers and I could always tell how much more exhausted I was at work if I hadn't had a good nights sleep due to DC illness.

I think a lot of posters are being needlessly harsh on you OP, you seem to have encouraged the holier than thou mothers who feel it's their right to claim that you obviously don't want a child badly enough if you're worried about being exhausted. That is a perfectly reasonable and valid concern.

Telling someone they don't want something enough because they dare mention some concerns isn't helpful at all. Of course you'll be tired, some people manage it better than others but you could say that about a myriad of other things too, pain, stress, grief for instance.

Everyone's experience of pregnancy, childbirth and the very early years is different.

As he wants to crack on with it, will he be an involved hands on dad? Bathing, feeding, waking up in the night etc

Nothing will build resentment and make you feel you regret like a partner who doesn't step up and who sees almost everything to do with a baby as the mum's job.

Regarding work, think about whether you'll return full time/part time. Have you discussed childcare options....so often this all falls to the woman and her career is usually the one affected.

This is probably getting ahead of your stage, but think about finances.... joint...separate...childcare expenses.

What changes will there be when you're on maternity leave and not earning or earning as much.

Discussing these things between you is helpful.

@SandyY2K yes absolutely he will be hands on. We've already discussed all of that. I wouldn't go into it with anyone I hadn't fully discussed it with (and felt comfortable with the responses).