I cannot seem to stop eating

[fatternotfitter]

A couple of years ago I lost 90 pounds over about 12 months, combination of diet and exercise. Was normal BMI, a size 10-12. I felt great. I was exercising 5 times a week, running 5k (not fast, I'm not a natural runner) but running it nonetheless. I was the thinnest I'd been in 20 years and probably the fittest I'd ever been. I even learnt to swim (after being terrified of water as a child, and then too fat to want to appear in public in a swimming costume).

I gained a little weight at the end of 2019 (10-15 pounds max), but up to March 2020 was still exercising regularly, and was hoping to lose that within the next couple of months.

And then lockdown happened.

I've been WFH since the start of March last year and the weight has literally piled on. I'm eating all the time, and what started (at the beginning of lockdown) as let's buy some chocolate/ biscuits/ snack foods to cheer ourselves up, is now the norm.

We were lucky enough to go away in the summer (just in the UK) and I was a bit annoyed with myself then that my clothes from the previous summer didn't fit (except the looser ones). By that point I was up to a 14-16.

I am now an 18, and still gaining. My fat clothes are now getting tight. I have no motivation and every day I'm thinking about what I can eat next. I'm disappointed with myself for backsliding so far and continuing to do so, but I am just struggling with starting again.

I eat because I'm bored, because food is a treat, because I feel bad about how overweight I've become. And on and on it goes!

How do I stop? Should be simple shouldn't it, but I honestly can't seem to manage it.

I could of written a very similar post. I'd lost three stone and was a small 12 and maintained until lockdown then it slowly started increasing, anyway I have now gained almost three stone and am a 16. I'm disgusted with myself. Iv always been an emotional eater but this lockdown is making me so down and having nothing to do I just reach for food when bored or down. It's the only thing that brings me joy just now.

I have started a diet today but I'm already convinced it wont last. I seem to of lost all willpower and use to be great at dieting. Just so disappointed in myself..I'm the biggest I have ever been and need to do something now because if I dont and I'm like this when we can go back out my social anxiety will be ten times worse than it was before.

First things first, stop criticising yourself.
That helps nothing. I'm working to try and turn my mindset around as I'm in a similar situation and I'm telling myself "I want to be as healthy as I can for my children and my future" "I'm not depriving myself of treats, I'm working towards my goal" and "will this make me feel better after eating or worse?"
Forgiving myself for a blip here and there and allowing myself a day where I don't worry about it.
So far it's working 🤞

Loads of people do that OP, it's called yo-yo dieting. That's why diets are said not to work. You have to change your attitude to food to maintain weight loss which evidently didn't happen as you say that food cheers you up and you eat when you're bored.

Can I join because I'm the same constantly snacking and the weight has piled on. Looking at photos this last year I look huge, I hate it.

Try not to be too hard on yourself OP. The past year has been hard in a lot of ways and you are far from the only one who has derailed a bit and put on some weight. You have lost weight before and can do it again. Make decision to get back into a healthy routine again, start exercising and cut out some of the snacking. When the weight starts coming off and you feel better about yourself you will get your motivation back. Most importantly, if you have a bad day it’s not the be all and end all. Just get back to it the following day and the rest will happen.

can you just not buy snack foods? only buy the items you need for meals. if you don't have crisps and biscuits in the home you can't eat them.

you say you eat because you are bored, can you find other rituals? i hate coffee personally but i make my husband a cafetière every morning, the entire process take almost ten minutes - heating the cafetière, heating the water to 95 degrees, allowing to brew... its a moment in the day to pause, almost like meditation. try and find those things for yourself

I sympathise OP. Food really is a bigger source of pleasure than ever before, I find myself buying the nicer (more calorific) versions of youngsters because, lockdown.

The way I'm keeping it balanced (for now!) is exercise. I miss the pool and gym but am running and doing home work outs. You said you were doing 5k runs, could you try to start again? Maybe use the app to get started? I realise losing weight is more about diet, but I find if I'm exercising, I feel better about myself, less depressed and less likely to binge.

Good luck and be kind to yourself. Self loathing will only make it worse. You're definitely not alone.

you do need to allow yourself treats, just not multiple times a day every day.

I pretty much eat however I want at the weekends: drink alcohol, sweet treats, Bombay mix, pastries for breakfast... but none on week days. my only exception is having a hot chocolate on Tuesday evenings, I always thoroughly enjoy and look forward to it.

I had changed my eating habits quite significantly a couple of years ago - I wasn't following a diet plan specifically, I just cut out any kind of snack foods, reduced my carb intake dramatically (only ate pasta/potatoes/ rice 1-2 times per week, the rest of the time was fish or meat and veg), limited my bread/ cereal, drank lots of water and ate 3-4 pieces of fruit per day.

It didn't stop me still wanting to eat chocolate but I was able to restrain myself to limit that to the odd square here and there. And at the time was quite happy to do so - the problem was that lockdown changed that occasional treat into a daily one, and soon one square wasn't enough either.

Things, not youngsters!! God that sounds sinister

My question to you would be what are you eating? I think for many of us this is the key. It’s not a lack of willpower, it’s that some foods ramp up your hunger and some foods trigger your satiety hormone.

yes, @justanotherneighinparadise makes an amazing point. Are the meals you are having nourishing enough? I saw a documentary years ago which identified that someone people who were overweight and complained they ate a lot because they were always hungry were deficient in numerous vitamins and minerals. Even though calorie wise they were well over what they needed their bodies continued to send hunger signals as they still hadn't got what they needed nutritionally from the food.

I'm eating whatever is in the house. So if there's chocolate I'll eat that, if there's no chocolate (and I have had several attempts since March where I said 'that's it, no more snacks' and stopped buying them for a few weeks), then bowls of cereal. Or toast with various toppings. Or sandwiches. Fruit. Noodles. Rice. Leftovers from dinner the previous night. Whatever food there is, basically.

A year ago on a typical day I might have an overnight oats type breakfast, scrambled egg and beans/spinach for lunch, and then a small piece of fish and salad, maybe some couscous or a jacket potato (with a bit of cheese) for dinner.

I've eaten more already today than that, and it's not even 4pm. God I feel embarrassed

I hear you OP! The only thing that has worked for me is not buying the crap stuff to begin with. I'm doing Tesco online shop so I'm not tempted. Weekends are still fair game to me though!

Same here. There is no joy in life, no distractions, no comfort in family and friends. I sit in a chair in my kitchen WFH 10 hours a day with no one to speak to and nothing to look forward to. Food is the only comfort. I am disgusted and disappointed in myself. No solution here but just wanted to say there are lots of us in the same boat

I'm trying to refocus my mind. I was so happy when I lost all the weight, and honestly I think if lockdown hadn't happened I wouldn't have gained so much (sitting around all day in stretchy clothes has not helped one bit!) but if I start now I can still be slimmer by the summer. I might not be where I was by then but I should at least be back to the size I was last summer.

I was running a lot outside in March/April. Then it got too hot (I used to go to the gym pre March, but our gym is tiny and they were pretty lax hygiene wise so even when gyms reopened in the summer I didn't go back). I bought myself a treadmill to run at home but haven't been on it since October and even before that I was doing a fraction of my previous exercise. I did have Covid over Christmas so was feeling peaky for a couple of weeks but that's the only excuse I've had for not exercising in the last 10 months!

thanks all for not judging me! And solidarity to those of us in the same boat :)

@WhereamI88 you sound like me! I feel like I'm going to start developing pressure sores from being sat on my now rather ample ass for up to 10 hours a day.

I actually moved myself upstairs away from the kitchen to stop me eating. Sadly it didn't work.

I've posted a similar tale of woe in Weight Loss Chat earlier today. I was fit and healthy pre-lockdown and am now just fat and miserable. I am trying to get my head back into it today - I have my workout gear on and am planning on doing a quick HIIT after work and I had a decent, low carb lunch with no snacking so far. I think I can only cope with one day at a time right now.

So no advice but know you are not alone!

Okay. So look at what you’ve listed. Can you see the majority is carbs/things high in sugar? I’ll list them for you.

Chocolate
Cereal
Toast
Sandwiches
Fruit
Noodles
Rice

So tomorrow eat slightly different. Start the day with eggs, however you like them. For lunch have something high in protein. Say a salad with tuna or chicken, some avocado, cottage cheese, some olives then for dinner something like salmon on veggies. Or maybe chicken, mince but instead of pasta you might pick courgette noodles or cauli rice.

It’s not a case of going on a diet. It’s a simple case of swaps.

I’d be really interested if you did this tomorrow and then came back and updated whether you still are everything in sight. Or whether you ate and feel full. Then ate and felt full, then smiled to yourself and realised it was nothing to do with willpower and everything to do with food choices.

Try 5:2 not on consecutive days so you don't feel you're denying yourself?

You've done it before, you can do it again :)

Pre xmas I was hiding in the kitchen during my down time in order to get some space from the kids. Dietician suggested meditations and mindfulness and now I clean the house and read books and draw etc instead of stuffing my face, and I don't even need to be mindful about that half the time, I just do it. I am starting to see results in my body and that is motivational. I am driven by results, so it is hard to get started and keep going before you see results. You just have to power through.

Have been exactly the same. I had lots loads and just had 1 stone left to lose at this point last year but now have 3.5 stone to lose.

I started to turn it around about a month ago.

1st and second week I ate whatever I wanted but only as part of a meal. So meals weren't particularly healthy but I broke the habit of snacking between meals.

Last week and this week, I've gone back to healthy foods but I'm not watching portion sizes. Next week, I'll begin to reduce them to what they should be.

Unfortunately, if I just cut things and say I'm dieting, I know I'll cave within a week. This way I break the habits without being hungry etc.

I'm trying to get back into the habit of cooking a proper meal every night, as currently some nights I feel so drained from work I will just snack on whatever is available. I'm also as of this week not buying anything else that isn't potential meal 'content' (so no biscuits, chocolate or other snacks). I will still have bread in the house but will ration myself to one slice a day.

I need to restart the exercise too, they go hand in hand for me. Once I'm exercising more I won't want to eat as much BUT while I'm not exercising I'm eating more, and then I feel too exhausted to even consider the treadmill.

It's really hard OP, don't be too hard on yourself. Personally I am way too hard on myself which makes it worse - no matter what happens I feel like a failure which makes me eat more because I'm a fat loser now anyway. That's a terrible mindset. These are unprecedented times. Not having seen family for over a year now is not normal. I've seen friends a handful of times all year and the last time was October.

I was so obedient in the first lockdown. I was one of those people that criticized others for sunbathing and going to their second homes. I am still following the rules, but I don't judge anyone anymore. Even the young people caught at parties for 200 people, I do understand them. Just go easy on yourself.

With Lent coming up in two weeks it could be a good opportunity to take on changes as a 40 day challenge. I almost always give stuff up for Lent to test myself, knowing you only have x days to complete the challenge is great motivation to keep going. Then once Lent is complete you have already broken the cycle of bad habits.