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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

....... to expect primary school to post application form; school secretary insists I collect it in person.

59 replies

BatteriesNotIncluded · 31/10/2007 12:59

Are school secretaries notoriously 'formidable' or is this unusual?

When I satarted researching about primary schhols in 2005, I went into the school on the off chance and requested some literature. She expressed her horror that I had just 'walked in off the street' to ask for a form. She was quite rude and stated that 'things arent done like that' at this school, said I should return after June 2007.

Anyway we attend the attached church, but dont live locally, so a friend offered to collect a form when she collected her daughter from the school.

But NOOOOO, school secretary says they 'dont do things like that' at that school as they prefer to 'deal with the parents directly'. Ive just called the school and after being asked my name, where I live, child's name, date of birth, whether I attend the adjoining church and my address, school sec says that she cant post the application form to me as they prefer to deal with parents IN PERSON!

Am I missing something? Why would this be?

As I said, I dont live up the road from the school. I also have a new baby and school obviously closed on Sundays when I go to church. Im frustrated by this,but dont want to rile the sec by trying to insist she posts the forms, or by complaining to the Head. She has my details and I dont want her to 'earmark' my application in any way.

Dont want to stoke the old church school debate; just want opinions on whether this is unusual?

TIA. x

OP posts:
oliveoil · 31/10/2007 13:05

we had to 'Register an Interest" in person, with birth certificate

dooley1 · 31/10/2007 13:06

we can do ours online in December here for September 2008

Original poster
BatteriesNotIncluded · 31/10/2007 13:14

The Sec didnt mention anything about bringing proof of DOB. I have applied on-line, but as it is a voluntary aided school, need to complete a supplementary application form for the school as well.

Just spoke to friend whose daughter started the school this September, she says proof not required at this stage, but to be included with completed form.

Feel like this Sec is conducting her own addmission vetting process. Do you think it is unreasonable to e-mail the head and request the form to be posted?

OP posts:
NAB3 · 31/10/2007 13:16

At some point you will have to take in the birth certificate so the school can see that the child is the age their parents say s/he is.

throckenholt · 31/10/2007 13:20

just accept it is inconvenient and go to the school. After all you will having to make that journey daily when your dc goes there.

Original poster
BatteriesNotIncluded · 31/10/2007 13:20

The procedure is that a copy of the either the birth certificate or passport should be attached to the form, which, when completed is given to the vicar to verify attendance. The vicar then returns the form to the school.

OP posts:
ADragonIs4LifeNotJustHalloween · 31/10/2007 13:22

It's not unreasonable for them to insist you go in person given that you are meant to live locally to attend the school.

prufrock · 31/10/2007 13:22

It is quite normal for them not to post I'm afraid - imagine if everyone requested them posted? But a bit of a jobsworth to not let your friend get one.

kookaburra · 31/10/2007 13:22

School secretaries can be scary, but if you get on the right side of them, they are wnderfully helpful.
Why not just use the trip as atest run for when you are making the journey twice a day

oliveoil · 31/10/2007 13:23

we couldn't send a copy, we had to take in the original which they then copied and handed back

then we got the official form from the Council which could either be done on line or via the post

initial contact HAD to be in person

I really wouldn't go over anyone's head and go to the head on this, really

newgirl · 31/10/2007 13:26

the secretary does sound very officious - i would have thought posting it was the easiest thing for her too!

i wonder if this is a sign of how the school treats their parents? slightly off-putting to be honest

dooley1 · 31/10/2007 13:27

I think if you want your dc to go to that school you have to play by their rules
the school secretary will be following the school's admission policy so going to the head will not help you

chopchopbusybusy · 31/10/2007 13:30

Well I think it is probably slightly unreasonable of the school - assuming they do take children from your area if they attend the neighbouring church. TBH though if the school is irritating you at this early stage in the admission procedure, I'd probably want to look at an alternative option

goingfor3 · 31/10/2007 13:30

You'll be doing the journey twice a day when your dd starts the school so you may aswell get used to it. I agree it's a real pain your friend can't pick one up for you though I understand the school not posting it probably to save money.

Original poster
BatteriesNotIncluded · 31/10/2007 13:31

Guess im going to go in for the form then. Should have mentioned that the Head attends the church and we acknowledge each other, though she does know me and DD's names. I was thinking about emailling her on a personal 'favour' level rather than in complaint IYKWIM.

PS. Main criteria (after statemented and cared for children) is regular church attended for specified period. Locality is criteria 6! Good for me!

Thanks for all your replies. x

OP posts:
Wordsmith · 31/10/2007 13:33

IME schools think you are being unreasonable if you ask them to do anything that might make your life a little bit easier, but which involves a teensy tiny change in the way they do things.

I would take this as an indication of the way they deal with parents, and look for another school, to be honest. Some schools treat parents as an irritation, rather than, for want of a better word, a customer.

Bundle · 31/10/2007 13:35

I think it's fair enough to want to see you in person, given the lengths that some people go to, to get their kids into schools (lying about address etc)

MrsWobble · 31/10/2007 13:37

my dh is a primary school governor. one of the board of governors greatest irritations is parents trying to behave like "customers" and aserting "rights". they continually spell out that they are there to meet the children's needs - the mantra is "Every Child Matters" , not the parents and if parents don't like that attitude then perhaps it isn't the school for them.

not saying this is how your school is, but you may find that parental convenience does not rank highly in the list of factors to consider

Original poster
BatteriesNotIncluded · 31/10/2007 13:42

Sorry Bundle, I dont understand what you mean. (my name says it all!) Unless she's going to take my photo, I dont get it. (Im only asking cos any added info may be useful to me - im new to all this). As I said, she already took my address but I am confused why at this stage if she wasnt going to post the form. Address in iteslf not relevant (I dont think) for reasons I previously explained.

I AM going to go in, but Im going to be very, very nice to her - it may be best for the future. I havent actually committed myself to sending DD there, but you never know.

OP posts:
Niecie · 31/10/2007 13:58

I thought the rules were that you had to collect the form from the school which is your catchment school which, for a lot of people would make it within walking distance. You don't have to apply there but that is where you get the form from. I think collecting it is standard practice. The school sec isn't just trying to be a pain.

DS's school has 90 children in their intake. Can you imagine sending out in excess of 90 applications. The cost and the time involved would be big and most schools probably don't have the spare resources to do this.

fedupwasherwoman · 31/10/2007 14:10

We collected an application form from a school which was our nearest but due to there being one form across the board for all local infant/primary schools it mattered not a jot where we collected it from. We didn't put that school as first choice or even second and eventually applied on-line anyway.

fedupwasherwoman · 31/10/2007 14:12

It doesn't have to be catchment area all 3 of our choices offered us a form.

They happily put brochures in the post so I'm not sure what the big deal is about application forms.

prufrock · 31/10/2007 14:28

You fill in the same form for all schools in your LEA (which can also be done online) but voluntary aided schools are allowed to specify their own entrance criteria (usually involving church attendance or appreciation of the christian ethos) on a supplementary form, which is picked up from teh school in question.

FluffyMummy123 · 31/10/2007 14:29

Message withdrawn

Wordsmith · 31/10/2007 18:36

Mrs Wobble, I did say 'for want of a better word, customer'.

However, why the hell shouldn't schools consider the parents? It's not as if the parents don't have their children's best interests at heart - and the children are often too young to speak for themselves in terms of their needs and what's best for them.

The attitude you seem to be espousing is that parents' concerns automatically don't matter. Parents should have a voice in the school beyond the pastoral role of the PTA.

What you call "parental convenience" actually means parental interest and concern in their child's eductaion, and it's absolutely amazing to me that another parent should think any different.

I am hoping to be elected a parent governor at my son's school precisely because of attitudes like yours.