AIBU to start again after a big gap?

[Amikraminot]

I have DD15 from my first marriage. My OH and I are wondering whether or not to have children. I always thought I would have a few DC but life happened. My OH doesn't have children and is as undecided as I am!

Has anyone else had a couple more children with a very big age gap? Did you regret it or was it great? On one hand it feels like I'm almost at the end of parenting years and will have my own life by the time I'm 40, but is this such a good thing? Or if I have more children I will be raising children until I'm 60! If it makes any difference, I didn't particularly enjoy the baby/toddler years, this may be what is putting me off.

I'm 35, financially secure and getting married next year (would have been last year, but covid!)

It's nobody else's decision but you and DH.

That said, your older DD might not be too impressed with a crying baby around as she moves into A level years and wants quiet for studying. Also, could find it embarrassing and possibly feel like she's being replaced as she gets older and independent, off to uni etc

What would your daughter think? I loved babies and children when I was a teenager and would have been thrilled to have a baby brother or sister and would have been on hand for a lot of childcare for my mum. Other teens would be less keen. I think that would influence my decision a bit in your situation.

There’s13 years between my dd’s.

They have adored one another since day one and still do 10 years later.

There is a 14 year age gap between my 1st brother and me, and 20 years between my 2nd brother and me (dad and SM's sons), and I love them and had a very special bond with my 1st bro when he was little, but tbh, once I became an adult I think it really hindered my relationship with my father somewhat because he could never really do the adult things. With my mother and stepfather, everything was awesome as I got older. We went out to dinners, had late night bonfires with family, movies and shows, went on trips away. With dad that was just not possible with the boys so we never really developed a solid adult relationship.

With my children, there's 11 years between my oldest and youngest, and if I had to do it again I probably wouldn't.

I has a 10 year and then nearly 12 year gap and it’s been great. My 3DC are all grown up now and get on really well.
I’ve never regretted it but I had my last DC at 31 so I was a part time empty nester at 49 when my my third DC went to uni which was the same age.

I had my DC aged 16 and 29.

It didn't feel like starting again because I was still young, not sure if I would have had the second if I had been 35 though.