Australia or UK?

[Tinseltangle]

After 7 years living in Oz my marriage has ended and I find myself unsure what to do. We have no children and no family here, all my family are back in the UK. It was my husbands dream to move here, but I never believed it would be forever. My ex is staying in Oz. I know I cant go anywhere due to covid at the moment so it will probably be at least a year before I can leave. I have a decent job and some friends. I have no idea what job i could do in the uk and most friends there have moved on, but I could reconnect with some of them. Parents are in their 70s and not getting any younger. Its only been a couple of months and I am still very unhappy and probably not in the right head space to make big decisions, I just feel so lost. How the heck do I decide what to do? Staying here makes financial sense, but thats all.

God you poor thing. Don't try and make a decision now. Just do everything you can to look after yourself, be kind to yourself, rebuild yourself. Just live in each day and take happiness where you can. Please don't obsess about this decision. It doesn't matter for now. You matter.

I’m in Adelaide. If my dh and I split and we had no children I would be back home like a shot. As it is I have children and no money. I quite like Adelaide so happy to stay here. It really comes down to whether you can financially get back to uk and survive while job hunting etc. it’s a tough decision.

You'll miss the warmth for sure.

But you'll enjoy seeing friends and family and just our general britishness and banter.

The long dark cold winters here last 9 months compared to 0 in OZ.
Wait till Lockdown / Covid is over and decide then.

In fact come over to the UK for a holiday and see how you feel before relocating.

Also start reconnecting with old UK friends now.

Are you a citizen or permanent resident? That may decide the matter for you if your sponsor withdraws support.

to deal with the usual science-free comment: southern Australia has winter, not as cold as ours due to latitude, and daylight hours don't get as short (or as long) as ours for the same reason. Northern Australia doesn't have our definition of winter but I wouldn't like to be there in their summer.

UK winter does not last 9 months. Person concerned must live on the wrong side of a hill.

Clearly I'm exaggerating for effect @murbblurb

I should be ok financially if I couldnt find a job in the UK right away, but I would take any job initially. I dont like the heat at all, I am pale skinned and stay out of it as much as possible. In summer most of us live in air conditioning, from our houses, to our cars, to our work. Today has been 38 degrees so too hot to do anything. I live for winter when I can wear jeans and I miss the seasons. I have been back to the UK for visits and the traffic was shocking, but i live in a rural area in Oz, so anywhere seems busy by comparison.
I have never felt so alone in my entire life and am the wrong side of 40 so feel like whatever I decide that will be it for the rest of my life.

I am a citizen, so free to come and go.

Any chance you could take a sabbatical from your job in Australia and come to the UK for a few weeks / months when it is possible to do so? You'd get a chance to spend time with family etc and would get an idea of what moving back might be like.

I have lived in sydney for 12 years now, been through a divorce with one now 8yo son. If his dad wasn't staying here I'd probably move back home to England, for me that's not an option now and I'm making the best of it. I have some lovely friends and a good job, but god I miss my family,

I’d choose the U.K. as a base but then seek work overseas.

When I moved, I struggled to find work in Australia in my field and found it difficult to meet people and make friends. The racism really got me down too. And yet, in many other ways it is a much more open minded society than the U.K. which I do like.

Are kids an issue? If so, I’d probably stay for them as I do think Australia is better for children.

Go to the uk. New chapter life and challenge. You can always move back if you change your mind.

I wouldn’t do anything yet. There is so much dust to settle with Covid and Brexit. You might get a better sense of what life will be like in both places in 12-18 months. Maybe start a savings pot so you have more options wherever you decide to settle?

As you’re an Australian citizen I would go back to the UK and see how it goes. If it doesn’t work out you can go back to Australia.

My DH is English and we live in Sydney. We’ve had a lot of friends return to the UK after living in Australia, mostly for family support with raising kids. Probably about half have come back again.

Can you study / go on a course that will help you find work in the future? So that this time doesn't seem wasted.

I am worried that my Australian CV wont cut the mustard in the uk. I work for the government here and will have an fantastic reference, but I really dont have a clue what i would do for work if I came back. My heart really doesnt want to be here, i feel like I would heal quicker if I left, but my head says give it time, its been 6 weeks since he dropped the bomb. I have a uk degree and a solid uk work history, but its 7 years out of date.
Saving is a good idea, thankfully I am pretty frugal when I have to be.

It’s a tough time to be sure. I’m sorry for it. As PP said saving is a wise option and as moving back to uk right now would be difficult I would probably stay here for a bit. When you do get home I am sure your experience here will be valuable and be able to find work especially seeing as you trained and worked in uk first. Less issue with them not understanding Aussie education.

When we first moved to aus from Devon we moved to Townsville. Hotter than the devils arse after a curry and straight into a category five cyclone. Thank god I am in Adelaide now.