I can't eat in certain places

[onedaybabywellbeold]

So for as long as I can remember I can't eat in certain places. For example, a hotel room, or holiday villa, I feel physically sick eating in them or at the thought of eating in them as I just focus on the thought of how many people have been in and out it over the years and how they're probably not properly clean. I also can't take a bath and hate taking a shower in these places for the same reason.

Another example, whenever we have moved into a new house, it taken me a couple of weeks before I feel comfortable eating in it and not sick at the thought of other peoples germs. And in my recent home I didn't take a bath for the first two years until we had a brand new one fitted, and now I have used it a few times but am starting to feel repulsed by it because I think what is down the drain from people showering, when I say people, I mean my husband and daughter.

My husband just got a new car today - previously used - on way back from picking up car we went to McDonald's drive thru and my daughter and husband ate there's in the car and I just couldn't as I thought that germs must be lingering from previous owners. My husband thinks I'm very strange.

Can't eat on trains either but can eat at restaurants and friends houses no problem. Also swimming pools absolutely repulse me.

I'm actually not the tidiest person and am certainly not worried about germs most of the time, my house is not sitting sparkling. It's just when it comes to eating or washing in these certain places.

Is this really really weird? My husband thinks it's bizarre and I need to get a grip.

AIBU?

@Mummypigisalwaysright I feel them on my skin and I feel really dirty and as if I need a good shower then start to feel sick. Yes I do actually have a heightened sense of smell now you mention it, certain smells can make me feel quite sick as well. Is there a connection there?

@WunWun rationally yes, but it doesn't matter if I tell myself rationally I can't physically feel germs, I feel as if I can. I just think of how many people must have slept in the bed or used the remote or shedded skin or spat in shower and I just don't believe that absolutely every corner can be cleaned so I know there are germs kicking about and it makes me feel ill.

I think that smells layer quite easily on soft furnishings, particularly sweat and oils from bodies. You might be smelling them and the brain is sending out signals to warn you. If you were to go to a restaurant, would you choose a hardback chair and avoid fabric ones? Showers and baths are also where a lot of dead skin cells and oils accumulate.

It's interesting that it centres around eating also. A lot of the tasting is in the smelling.

It could also be psychological. Were you ever forced to eat somewhere that was dirty as a child? Or even with someone who smelled strongly or unpleasant?

It could be a mixture of both. I'm no psychologist but I find these kinds of subconscious behaviours fascinating.

OP I get this too. Not in the same places as you, but in certain people's houses, or at buffets, especially "bring your own" affairs. I know what you mean about "feeling" the germs after being in certain places, and also struggle to shower and bath in hotels or other people's houses.
I have been diagnosed with OCD though, although mine manifests in other ways (I thought I had anxiety so recently sought help for repeated checking and obsessive ruminations and was told it was actually OCD). Bizarrely I never actually connected the two, though now I'm thinking about it it's fairly obvious!

I've had CBT through my local self-referral IAPT service which is helping. Might be worth a try for you if it's bothering you?

Also, I'm a very untidy person so I'm a big hypocrite feeling unclean in other people's houses. I don't mind my own dirt

It is definity a phobia [of germs]. It is also a learned behaviour that you may have picked up in childhood. Did your mother / father 'warn' you about germs at any point at a particular time/place? A hospital maybe? Did you eat in a hotel room, and was poorly the next day? This maybe why you are associating places with being il.

You will be able to get help for it, probably CBT

Good luck!

@HalfGirlHalfCake

Have you tried self trepanning? That would probably help

Drilling a hole in her own skull?! Or is there another thing called trepanning?

@onedaybabywellbeold this is not normal. You should seek professional help.

It’s more than weird, it’s a disorder eg OCD.

Some professional help could be good before it gets out of hand.