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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To want my DD to nap in her cot

39 replies

Carolba · 28/01/2021 14:21

My DD is 7 months old and is an absolute pleasure. She has a brilliant routine and is a constantly happy smiley, like a dream. She sleeps in her cot at night from 7pm until 7am. She has about an hour nap in the morning and then a 2 hour nap in the afternoon from about 2 until 4 but she naps on me downstairs. I have tried a few times to get her to nap in her cot, especially for the 2 hour nap but even though I am still in the room with her holding her hand, rubbing her head etc she just screams. I have just tried again now and given up after 15 minutes, and we are back on the couch and she is asleep. It means now I can't move for 2 hours, can't do any odd jobs, make a drink, nip to the loo or even talk on the phone as it will wake her. I am also 7 weeks pregnant (so very excited :) ) and thinking that now would be a good time to really make an effort to get her to sleep in her cot so maybe I can grab half an hour (I would never sleep with her on me). I am also getting a bit uncomfortable as she is a lot heavier now and know that when our new arrival comes it will be impossible for her to slumber on me like she does. I don't think a sling would work either as my back is already hurting. AIBU in wanting her to have naps in her cot now? Or do I just leave well alone? Does anyone have any advise on how I can make that happen, without having her upset and crying? I have tried a little mini nap time routine with her (similar to bedtime) and she is not having any of it!

OP posts:
Cornetttttto · 28/01/2021 14:23

Put her in a pram and take her for a walk? Used to work with mine and the fresh air did me good too. I'd get home and he was fast asleep and stayed asleep in our hallway. On days that it rained, I would push the pram back and forth in hallway.

mdh2020 · 28/01/2021 14:32

Sorry but it will take longer than 15 minutes. Make sure she is fed and dry and put her in the cot and leave the room. She may cry for 45 minutes but the next day she will cry less and the next and the next. Sometimes you have to be hard.

bettyfluff · 28/01/2021 14:37

My DD was exactly the same, only napping on me until a few weeks ago. She's nearly 8 months now. I started putting her in the pram and rocking her off to sleep. She would only sleep 20-30 mins at the start, but now can have anything up to 2 hours. I never thought I'd get to that point! She'd finally started sleeping well in the cot at night too so I was worried i'd spoil that by fighting to get her to nap there in the day. Must admit...I'm getting loads done now but I do miss the cuddles!

user1493413286 · 28/01/2021 14:38

I had that issue at a younger age and over a few days I did a process of moving DD to her pram; first time I waited until she was fully asleep then rocked the pram when she stirred and over the next few days I did it a bit sooner each time until I could just put her in the pram.

madmara · 28/01/2021 14:44

Mine was the same - slept like a dream in the cot at night but couldn't abide it during the day.

I used the pram for naps in the end - either on a walk or rocked her to sleep in the pram.

raspberryk · 28/01/2021 14:45

It takes more than 15 mins just keep trying, I started by cuddling to sleep and once deeply asleep move to the cot but keep hold of baby and shhh pat if they stirred. If they woke, cuddled back to sleep, eventually moved to shh pat from awake in the cot and then eventually just laying them in there. Takes a few weeks but it’s worth it.

FilthyforFirth · 28/01/2021 14:51

I am having similar issues with my 3 month old. Love the cuddles, but he only sleeps on me during the day and my house is a bomb site as I also have a 3 year old. I want him to sleep in the sleepyhead so I can put some laundry out, empty dishwasher etc (open plan house, he is still near me, I'm not leaving a 3 month old alone to sleep!). DS1 was a bloody dream in the sleepyhead and I was able to get so much done.

Although I like to differentiate between day and night sleeping, I have just given in and swaddled him and he is asleep! (Yet here I am mning instead of that dishwasher...).

I was about to suggest a swaddle but have since realised your 7 month old will be tool old now. Oops! My other suggestion is white noise. Would that help? Mine is cranked up pretty loud and it seems to have done the trick!

Unanananana · 28/01/2021 14:56

I always used the pram/push chair for naps for my two. They were happier and I could push them wherever I needed to go. Cot was for bedtime and they just wouldn't sleep in there during the day but went down happily at night. I can't imagine being tied to the house at certain times every day. My DB and SIL do the cot for naps and their days are horribly restricted.

MindGrapes · 28/01/2021 14:57

I had this with DC until about 10 months. Afternoon nap would always need a push around in the pushchair. Eventually he went down in the cot and it was life-changing!

ParkheadParadise · 28/01/2021 15:00

I always used the pram for daytime naps.

EggyBread4me · 28/01/2021 15:01

I might be on my own here, but I never wanted either of mine to be cot nappers! I always did naps in the buggy, even when inside. The benefit of this was we were never tied to the house at nap time. It also meant they were strapped down (couldn't stand up - easier to fall asleep!) I could put a snooze shade over them, and if they were being tricky I could rock them to sleep. Also much easier when on holiday, no trouble sleeping in a buggy in the evening 🙂

MrsTerryPratchett · 28/01/2021 15:03

Do not leave your 7 month old to cry for 45 minutes!

If you don't have pets, could you wait until she's asleep on you then flip her to a travel mattress on the floor? Safe and near you. DD loved her living room 'nest'

MindGrapes · 28/01/2021 15:04

Mine would always fall asleep in the pushchair for naps, but cots as an option was a bonus. This option wasn't available until about 9-10 months and more options makes life a lot easier.

shouldistop · 28/01/2021 15:05

What do you do with her bedtime routine at night that's different? Are you making it dark in her room for naps? Putting a sleeping bag on (if you use it at night)?

Quail15 · 28/01/2021 15:06

My DD is/was the same. She sleeps so well in her cot at night but during the day she has only very rarely slept in her cot at home.

She usually naps well at nursery and when she stays at my mum's however whenever she is at home she will only sleep on me or refuses to nap at all which results in a very grouchy child. She is now just 2. Many times we tried leaving her to scream in her cot to try and get her to nap .... She will scream for an hr rather than sleep in her cot during the day.
She won't sleep in her buggy. She will sleep in the car but only on a long drive.

I'm also pregnant - 28 weeks - so my DD has only a few weeks left before there is no more room on my lap for her to nap 😁 I have a feeling that she will completely drop her nap then rather than start napping in her cot.

Original poster
Carolba · 28/01/2021 15:12

Thank you everyone, I think I might try the pram tomorrow, it makes more sense as I will be able to get out in the afternoons when (if) the weather ever dries up! I love her routine and don't want to spoil it ..... and I will definitely miss the cuddles (but I wont miss having to hold my bladder for two hours!)

OP posts:
OrangeSlices998 · 28/01/2021 15:14

Can you put her down now she’s asleep?

Original poster
Carolba · 28/01/2021 15:16

@MrsTerryPratchett

Do not leave your 7 month old to cry for 45 minutes!

If you don't have pets, could you wait until she's asleep on you then flip her to a travel mattress on the floor? Safe and near you. DD loved her living room 'nest'

I would never leave her to cry for that long don't worry.

We have a cat!

OP posts:
Sheleg · 28/01/2021 15:18

Don't leave her for 45 minutes - what a cruel idea! Babies want warmth and closeness, and to know that you'll respond to their cries.

Original poster
Carolba · 28/01/2021 15:23

@shouldistop

What do you do with her bedtime routine at night that's different? Are you making it dark in her room for naps? Putting a sleeping bag on (if you use it at night)?
Her bedtime routine at night is longer. Bath (on bath nights) playing whilst we get her ready in her night clothes, her last bottle in her room then she goes into her sleeping bag, in cot then a story for about 20-30 minutes. I will then turn off the lamp, give her a kiss and leave the room. Even though she is still awake but she never murmurs and takes her self off to sleep. Daytime I have tried a little shortened version of change, sleeping bag, a mini story or just talking holding her hand but she starts screaming as soon as I put her in her cot .... and yes it's dark. it's like she knows lol.
OP posts:
Feetupteashot · 28/01/2021 15:27

Shove her in a buggy and walk around the block

Original poster
Carolba · 28/01/2021 15:32

@OrangeSlices998

Can you put her down now she’s asleep?
I have tried before and she has woke before getting her in her cot then she won't go back to sleep.

The pram is primed for tomorrow!

OP posts:
NotFabulousDarling · 28/01/2021 15:36

We have the opposite problem. Our LO sleeps fine at naps but not at night. We take our LO out in the pram whenever he won't sleep at night. We have actually got to the point where we take him out every night because it's easier than waiting to see if he'll sleep. The pram takes about half an hour to get him to go down, so much faster than putting Nonstop Wheels on The Bus on Youtube for him.

OrangeSlices998 · 28/01/2021 15:48

Keep trying if you can, she’s a good age for shhh patting, thanks to trying this (we modified it but it’s a baby whisperer thing) we were able to actually put the baby down which was a bloody miracle after 4 months of contact napping and co sleeping, mentally I needed some space. I never left her to cry but I did have to persevere in settling her in the cot. White noise and a comforter that I slept with for a few nights so it smelled like me also helped. If it doesn’t work for you, I hope the pram does!

And congrats on your pregnancy! X

MindGrapes · 28/01/2021 16:11

Once properly asleep in pushchair there's nothing to stop you (well there might be i suppose!) sneaking home and leaving her in the hallway, reclined in pushchair with the occasional rock/ push back and forth!

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