My DP and I are planning to get married soon (ish, obviously difficult at the moment) and started making plans regarding it. We're not going to exclude kids, especially our own from our previous relationships, and want to make them central to the day, in fact, there's no question over that from our point of view. Mine live with us full time, occasionally visiting the DF, my DP's live with both us and their DM on a week on, week off basis.
Earlier in the week, my DP's ex (significant mental health issues) contacted him to tell him that the kids want him to get back together with her, and as such she thinks they shouldn't attend the wedding, that it will be bad for them and we won't like it.
Firstly, it's ridiculous that they should ever get back together. Well before he met me, that was most definitely not going to happen! Secondly, his DC have not said anything like that in a very long time with my DP and he has always been very clear with them about the situation there (without going into details about her mental health, or the things she did around the relationship ending) that it would never be possible. It's not like it's a recent break up or anything, they have been divorced for years, and were divorced before I came into his life.
AIBU to think that she's just being vindictive, and may attempt to prevent the DC attending the wedding? Is this a common issue? It just seems so unbelievable to me that anyone would want to keep their own kids away from their wedding! Also worried that she might be telling the DC things like this (that they'll get back together) and if so, what else she might be saying to them. It's so unhealthy to mislead your own children like that.