Dating a bloke for several months. He's my boyfriend since October too. Like everyone else we have ended up locked down and unable to meet since. So we've had to phone romance it. Which has been lovely and still enjoyable. We have kept the passion Alive and continued to send gifts and have lovely conversations.
Unfortunately his depression has gotten terrible since Christmas. He improved for a week but then it came back after stopping a medication for pain last week.
He's spoken about it to me. I understand that right now he isn't thinking about sex. He's not in a romantic mood. He's barely able to chat some days. He's struggling and can't always sleep. It's a big change from how he was with me before.
So a few times this week I've suggested we cool it off. I've offered friendship and stuff. Space too. He always responds with nothings changed. I still love you. I still feel the same about you.
Today he's been chattier. But just normal day to day chat. No humour. No compliments. No cheeky comments still. Just feels like I'm struggling to navigate this big change. I feel like his mum asking him how he feels rather than us enjoying our relationship.
So tonight I text him to say I'm missing him and hope we can go back to chatting how we did. He said he didn't understand what we had lost. He called me and said he hates messages like that and he dreaded them. I just tried to talk about it openly. The thing is we haven't been involved long enough for long term problems like this. It is a horrible feeling.
The last seven days I've had him on the phone ranting and stressed. Dismissing my feelings. Getting defensive. But then saying he still loves me. It hasn't been easy some days.
Last Saturday he sent me flowers. We spoke on the phone. He told me to keep messaging him whilst he watched football. I said there was no need. He said I love it when you message me because I wish you was here with me. The next day he completely changed.
Anyway In my heart I feel it's over. This isn't what I wanted. It's rubbish. But everytime I try and end it he insists nothings changed and he's feeling much better. I know he attempted suicide in the past and only survived because he was found. So I don't want to tip him over the edge.
He popped around his neighbours tonight to help with something. He said I'll text you when I get home. He's been on Facebook for ages and nothing.
Feels so confusing. He doesn't want to end but doesn't have the energy for me right now either.
What would you do.