To think sod it and just stay where we are?

[Alldressedup]

Firstly, I completely acknowledge that we are very lucky to be in this position and have this dilemma in the current time.

We bought our current house about 10 years ago. It was a case of buying the best that was available on the market at the time for our budget. I never really loved the house. But accepted that it offered us all that we wanted. We have done a decent bit of work to the place and I have grown to like the place.

Fast forward 10 years and my salary has doubled, DH’s has increased too and we’ve received a sum of money from family. We are currently overpaying the mortgage, so we’re not frittering the money away. But I can’t shake the feeling that we ‘should’ move to a more expensive house and invest the money into our property. But the houses I would make the effort to move for would be a financial stretch (think 2-3x current mortgage). I doubt our salaries will rise too much more/at all in the next few years. The ones more within our budget are not really giving us anything we don’t already have, they just come in a ‘nicer package’ if you know what I mean - more kerb appeal, en-suite rather than additional stand alone bathroom, an extra bedroom but all other bedrooms are smaller etc.

I’m torn. I feel we’re getting to the stage that we either make the move in the next 12 months or we stay put and spend some money on this house instead. I will admit that I have a bit of house envy of some of my friends, which is maybe fuelling this. I’m really not materialistic so I’m a bit ashamed to admit this.

AIBU to tell myself to get over it, stop looking on RightMove and live a very comfortable life here, pay the mortgage off early and enjoy nice holidays etc Or will I always regret not stretching us more?

YABU - You’ll regret not moving if you can afford it now
YANBU - Just stay in your current house and be more comfortable with the extra money

You don’t seem to have any reason for moving other than you feel you should, something I really don’t understand at all

Pay off your mortgage faster and enjoy living a "nicer" lifestyle once life opens up a bit more??

New reliable cars, lovely holidays, hobbies - life is for living and enjoying

There's no clear answer here.

Personally, I wouldn't want to lumber myself with a huge mortgage. Could you get a much nicer house for a bit more, rather than loads? If it was 100k or less then I would probably move...if the house was going to be much, much nicer.
If it would mean a huge mortgage and all that stress, as well as not being able to enjoy holidays etc then I would probably stay put.

Why have you limited yourself to moving in the next 12 months? When the right house comes up you'll know
I would carry on looking

Yes, life would be very comfortable if we stayed out and I like that idea

@Liverbird77 The houses would be about £150k more than ours. For another £100k I’m really not getting enough extra to make it worth our while. So yes, it’s quite a jump (we’re in the north so not SE prices)

Don’t play at keeping up with the Jones’s. Many people make that mistake & will end up working until 75 to pay for it. Enjoy your house, holidays, a stress free life & early retirement if you want it.

Enjoy the freedom that being comfortable offers. Book holidays (in the future), write lists of things you want to do. Have peace in the knowledge that you'll be ok if you lose your job.

There's so much more to life than chasing large or expensive houses. Honestly, it's just not worth it. Enjoy the freedom you have

If you’re under 40 I’d move. If over 40 and stay!

We are in a similar position. Our wages have increased so feel we should move, the only things I’d like from a new house is a garage for storage and for it to be detached. But I don’t want to pay double on my mortgage especially when the detached houses with garages here have smaller gardens and much smaller bedrooms. We’re increasing our pensions instead.

Yes pay into your pensions!!

If the area is nice and the house isn't overcrowded as such, I'd stay put. Sort out your pensions, save more, have lovely holidays and not be a mortgage slave.

If this last year has shown us anything, it's that circumstances can change in an instant.

Interesting thread. I'm in a similar although slightly different boat. My house is fine, it's a Victorian terrace with plenty of bedrooms but it has a scruffy outlook and train noise and the layout is funny. I do have a bit of house envy and could probably upgrade but I'm not sure it'd really be that life changing and it would cost a lot to move. Or I could move area entirely and get a lovely house but be away from friends and the life I've built here. So I think I'll stay where we are but maybe I'll invest a bit in the house and garden as soon as it feels safe to get people in.

We were just discussing this on a walk this morning when we realised a house was for sale on a street we've always said we'd love to live on. It was around £150k more than our current house, needs lots of work and doesn't offer any extra space, but is a quieter street closer to town. Our salaries have increased a lot since we bought our current house around 10 years ago, but actually we love our current house and have done loads to make it work for us. We will have paid off the mortgage in 7 years and have reached the point where if one of us lost our job then we'd still be fine. We've concluded that staying put and enjoying life without a big mortgage is definitely the way to go. Lockdown has proved that we actually don't need more space as a family, but we do really miss holidays so we are going to prioritise travel and pensions and stay put.

Are there any practical reasons to move? eg - DC getting older and wanting more space (even if that's in a few years)

If not, I'd stay.

@lidoshuffle The area is nice - you pay a premium to live here rather than surrounding villages due to the excellent schools, transport links and high street. It’s a great place to bring up children and I wouldn’t want to leave (and the DC would hate that too)

We are early-mid 40s. 2 DC KS2 primary age.

The house isn’t overcrowded but I’d love an extra bedroom or study and like @longestlurkerever the front of the property looks a bit ‘nothing’.

For context, the house is a semi detached bungalow which has been extended into the loft so now has 3 decent sized bedrooms (could fit a double bed in them all), two bathrooms, kitchen diner and family/garden room, good sized living room. Detached garage, parking for 2-3 cars, quiet cul de sac location, nice garden area. Nice neighbours. On paper it’s more than adequate now I write it down. But it’s pretty bog standard for the town and there are some really lovely houses around (none on the market though!)

Seems a few people are in a similar position.

Why don’t you invest in making the outside look nicer if that bothers you? I’m on a 60’s estate. Lots of bungalows and semis but lots of them have been done up and look lovely. One has beautiful sash style sage windows and a lovely coloured render and the front has been landscaped. Our house has 4 doubles and I love the space. Houses we’ve looked at (I’d be happy with 3 bedrooms) only have 1 or 2 doubles because you pay the premium for naice street and more individual house. Ours was extended and the space is more than enough but we are working on the outside slowly.

Yes, increasing pension is a very good idea. I’m public sector and have been paying into my pension for 15+ years. DH has recently increased his contributions but definitely needs to do more as his is newer and not as good - he’s burying his head in the sand a little about it but I did convince him to pay in a bit more.

I also think we could have the mortgage paid off by our early 50s which would be great and enable us to help our children out financially when they want to buy a house. My parents were never able to help me out and I grew up in a household where money was tight, so I would love to be in a position to give the DC a leg up.

Plenty to think about...

I would move, life is too short

I would move for more space. The kids are still young and you've got many more years with them at home. Lots of people move around this stage if they can, when they realise kids need more space as they grow.

If it's not going to make a big difference to your everyday life then I would t bother. Having financial security is valuable but seems to be less and less common these days. By financial security I mean able to manage with the loss of one or both incomes and not having large outgoings.

However if you need more space for your family to grow into and it makes your life more comfortable without adding too much stress then I would do it as what else do you work hard for.

I think what you need to ask yourself is if you already have a house that gives you what you need now? Are your neighbours good? Do you want to move because you will feel judged if you don't?. Move house if you and your family want to, not because of a new set of financial circumstances, or feel as though you're pushed into it from people who have what you deem 'better'.

People who you feel have larger, nicer houses may be living beyond their means and may have taken on extra financial debt they really can't afford without scrimping in other ways, and worry daily about the financial impacts a more expensive home brings. It's easy to think others have it better, but the saying about not knowing what happens behind closed doors is very true. You'll probably find your friends/ family envying you your small mortgage, spending power and lack of financial worry.

Last year has taught all of us our finances can change suddenly and without warning through no fault of our own, and having one less worry (a large mortgage) is surely enough to make anyone think twice before making a huge purchase, especially if you're not really gaining much from it. Look around your home and see if there's anything that can be added/ changed before making a commitment to move. Kerb appeal can be worked on such as painting the outside walls, adding plants, re-laying the driveway/paths etc.

My DH and I had the exact same discussion a while back as were in a similar position (although salaries haven’t doubled!) and would like to live in a nicer area.

But the reality is that to get something as good as our house in that area is nearly doubling our mortgage and it’s only 5 miles away.

We’ve decided to stay put, do some more improvements and generally enjoy having a bit more cash.

Op, I've just read your last thread (you must have posted as I was typing) your house sounds lovely☺️. I'd love a house like what you're currently living in, it sounds like it just needs a little TLC to give it more kerb appeal. Look on Apartment Therapy/ Pinterest etc for inspiration. It just goes to prove what I said in my last post, I have a lovely house too, and I'm jealous of YOUR home😂😂

If your neighbours are good and the area is nice I would stay put. You cannot put a value on paying off your mortgage. Your house sounds perfect!

I was in a very similar situation, in that I probably ‘should’ have been paying out more on a mortgage in terms of long-term investment value, but would have to go up by 75 - 100k to get anything noticeably better.

What I did was borrow more on my home to fund the deposit for a buy to let property. The mortgage is costing me more, but not what it would cost me to move to somewhere that isn’t even much better, and I’m still putting the money to good use. Would you consider doing something like that?