Handhold please - marriage ending

[Hopelesslystuck]

If anyone is around I could really use a handhold.

Have been with DH for more than a decade and it seems we have reached the decision to part ways.

It is for the best but I am so desperately sad - we have two young children.

He’s left the family home this evening and it’s just so hard to understand how we’ve got here.

I didn’t want to read and run. I’m here.

I'm sorry. I'm here, too. Will you be able to manage financially? Are you working?

There's nothing to say that will make it better but you're not alone and it will get easier. I've been there and trust me, you'll be ok. Chin up, keep it as amicable as possible and remember that two parents that are happier apart are better than two miserable ones together. Take care of yourself x

Thank you, all of you.

I am working, full time.

He earns more than me so I will definitely feel it more but I will manage.

It’s just so terribly sad.

You will do more than manage - you’ll thrive. It will be tough but awesome. Lots of tough before the awesome unfortunately.

You will get through it, and it does get easier. I've been there and when i got past the gloomy days things started to look brighter

You're going to be okay OP

I’m sorry to hear you’re going through this. If it helps, try thinking of things from the reverse angle. Instead of thinking ‘How did we end up like this after 20 years?’, try to think ‘It’s good that we realised it wasn’t working instead of being miserable for years trying to make it work’. Does that make sense?

Good luck

So sorry OP, I know it might not seem like it right now but you will be ok.

It's sad yes...but it's a new start also. Were you both unhappy? Or was he leading this split?

For you op . Do you want to talk about it? There are some lady's on here that has been through what you are going through and will help you xx

I'm sorry

Thank you all, kind words are really helpful.

We have both been unhappy for a while but I have initiated this. He is still in denial mostly.

I do think he will see it’s for the best too but right now it’s just very very hurtful for both of us - for me it’s been death by 1000 papercuts this has been a long time coming. All the conversations we’ve had have been a waste of time as he’s still apparently shocked.

‘It’s good that we realised it wasn’t working instead of being miserable for years trying to make it work’

This is exactly what I’m clinging to. Our kids are young enough to adapt I hope.