To ask to be signed off from work?

[Kaylasmum49]

I work on a checkout in a large supermarket, I am in close contact with at least 100 people per shift, a fair number of those don't wear masks and seem to have no clue about social distancing. I feel very at risk. I am 54 and overweight due to lipoedema, I also suffer from severe health anxiety. My mental health has been particularly bad for the last 4 years. Recently I have been struggling to get out of bed before midday and embarrassingly I am having issues with showering/bathing.

I am tempted to call my gp and ask to be signed off but feel guilty at the thought and also quite cowardly. Back in March when it all started I was terrified and my work agreed to give me unpaid time off for 3 months. I was highly anxious when I went back but the numbers were really low so I managed to convince myself that I would be safe, but now that the numbers are so high with the new variant I have a huge fear of catching it. I have catastrophic thinking and feel certain that if I contract it I will die.

I have worked in my job for 29 years with a good work record.

AIBU?

I think you need to discuss things with your doctor.

Can you move to a different role at work which is less customer facing?

If you do go off what’s your long term plan? You need to make sure your getting the help you need and that the issues around getting up and showered don’t get worse.

@Sirzy yes your right. Call your GP op.

I can't really move to another role unfortunately. I think I would feel safer when the numbers get lower but right now I think it's only a matter of time until I catch it.

I have a 14 year old autistic ds who is very scared of covid, he hasn't left the house in weeks and he is worried about me going to work.

I don't know what to do.

If it's severely affecting your health and wellbeing then absolutely speak to your GP. It sounds like you need more support with your mental health outside of how you feel about work, too.

But as a pp said you might need to think about your long term plan, even though vaccinations are happening all the time Covid won't disappear overnight and you may need coping mechanisms to help, or a different role. Also speak to them about your difficulties with getting up and bathing etc, it's possible that if you are signed off then that'll get worse without the structure/motivation of work.

I have been struggling with my mental health for years but the pandemic has massively exacerbated it. Health anxiety is a living hell! As I stated previously, when the numbers are lower I will feel safer.

I am also in the process of trying to leave an abusive relationship, I just can't cope.

I felt so guilty when I took the time off unpaid last year. I really do feel like a coward

I suspect that staying home will make your anxiety worse. I might be wrong but I know with myself that having nothing productive to do makes my mental health worse. Perhaps a short time off to refresh yourself would be good, but long term could see you head in the opposite direction. A chat with your gp is probably the best thing to do. You can also find worksheets that help with anxiety online. I write a lot down and it helps with me.

I would agree that in normal times staying at home would probably not be the best idea but due to covid and having health anxiety going to work atm is actually terrifying for me. My last shift was on Sunday and I was actually shaking and felt on the verge of a full blown panic attack for my whole shift.

The whole environment at my work is scary. If I have to go on self scan it is much worse, it can get very busy and I am walking closely to many people, it's unavoidable.

You are not a coward! You are incredibly brave and facing so many tough obstacles. Definitely speak to your gp. You need to look after yourself and you shouldn’t feel guilt about it

Thank you for the kind words. I am waiting on a call from my gp.

You are not a coward, you are unwell and having to manage that alongside working in an incredibly challenging work environment. I hope you receive good support from your GP.

Still waiting for my gp to call. It seems by the voting a lot of people think I am being unreasonable. Would be interesting to know why they think that.

If you aren't well enough to go to work (due to a mental health related or physical illness) then you're well within your rights to be signed off sick so you can get better. Make sure you get sick pay first though (and how long for) if you can check your contract.

I haven't voted. Was on the verge of YABU but only because I saw the problem as your fear and not going to work itself. But having read your updates I think you should go off. Nobody should have to be this terrified. I would make a kind of recovery plan to spend my time. E.g. a timetable of things to help your well-being like walking, yoga, self care. Number one priority should be looking after yourself right now. You can't do that whilst in the grips of fear and anxiety.

The information we get on how and who is affected by covid can lead to false assumptions though. I will see if I can find anything reassuring...

@Kaylasmum49 you are not a coward and it’s not health anxiety. Your fears are not unfounded you are clinically vulnerable.

Ask the GP and do not feel bad about it, I have been signed off from work due to stress as well. Everyone copes differently. If you keeled over tomorrow your workplace would still be standing, put yourself first.

The issue is will your gp sign you off for months? As things aren't going to change for a while.

There's no shame in being signed off due to your mental health.

As someone who has previously suffered crippling anxiety (social, leading to agoraphobia, as opposed to health), I think being off will make it harder to go back. That's not to say it's the wrong thing to do if you can work on your anxiety and self care whilst you're off.

I think it'd be a very good idea to speak to your line manager and/or occupational health. There may well be the possibility of swapping your shifts/your role temporarily until you feel more comfortable. Depending on what care/supervision your son requires, maybe even working quieter shifts/night stock replenishment/a "back room" role e.g. bakery etc. If things like that might be a viable option.

You haven't caught it thus far and it really is unlikely you'll catch it if you wash your hands and take precautions.

So I do absolutely think you should go off work but taken this extract from a risk analysis site. I think your risk of dying is extremely low and finding information to support that will help. But the first priority is to stop work and rebuild your mental health.

*A 60 year old woman living in the North West of England, who is from an Indian ethnic background and has type 2 diabetes, coronary heart disease, heart failure and atrial fibrillation, is 172cm (5ft 7in) tall and weighs 92kg (14st 7lb) (BMI of 31.1, which is in the obese range).

What QCovid tells her: She has an estimated ‘absolute risk’ of dying from Covid-19 of 0.19% and of needing to go into hospital with Covid of 0.88%. In other words, in a large crowd of 10,000 people with the same risk factors, 19 are likely to die from Covid-19 and 88 are likely to need hospital treatment. These scores are for a 90-day period (similar to Spring 2020).*

Her risk of needing hospital treatment for Covid-19 or dying from it is ranked 94 out of 100 (where 100 is the very highest-risk people among the UK population).

www.bhf.org.uk/informationsupport/heart-matters-magazine/news/coronavirus-and-your-health/how-to-find-out-your-risk-when-it-comes-to-coronavirus

I don’t think you are being unreasonable but think if you do get signed off work you should use the time to try snd get help such as in the form of counselling or CBT.

Thanks for all the replies.

My gp had no hesitation in signing me off, she signed me off for a month. She knows me and how my anxiety affects me. She is increasing my antidepressant dose and is referring me to online cbt.

If you have never suffered from health anxiety you cannot imagine the absolute hell that it is.

that's great news. Take care of yourself.