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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

And people wonder why teachers leave

105 replies

Tanaria · 18/01/2021 17:30

More of a rant, I suppose, but still.

I'm having a formal complaint put against me. Because I've set a test, which a student failed to complete on time (not IT issues or timing, they were online). Despite giving 100% extra time. Despite announcing the test in advance. Despite tagging the students. Despite hanging around for over 1/2 the lesson to respond in Zoom and in writing for the rest. Despite giving students another chance to complete the test again.
Because the student asked a question about the test 2min after closing time - in my break and while I was in a meeting (IN MY BREAK) and juggling my own children at home. Complaining I took more than 30min to respond. After the lesson. And are now going for my head.

Well, I have given up on dry Jan. And I'm looking into working somewhere I don't have to deal with people anymore.

OP posts:
echt · 19/01/2021 07:23

OP. Make sure the complaint is in writing. Do not respond to it until you have "taken advice". You don't have to say what this is.

You certainly do not have to respond to things put to you on the spot in a meeting., i.e. the meeting being the first time you have seen the complaint in writing.
If SLT insist on meeting with you and telling you about the complaint, listen without commenting. Then say you will respond to it when you see it writing. Then leave the meeting.

Take a friend. They may not ask questions but can make notes.

If SLT are any good at all, they will have required the parents to submit complaint in writing.

ivfbeenbusy · 19/01/2021 07:34

I suppose the question is what was the expectation for you to still be monitoring only 2 minutes after the test has ended? And what was the context of the question they asked?
If they had been in school you'd still Be in the room 2 minutes later? I guess some parents feel there kids are being hung out to dry at home....oh here's this test get on with it at home and then the teacher is no where to be found? As a parent homeschooling it's easy to feel resentful and jump to conclusions about the whereabouts of a teacher with the lack of contact time some kids are having?

This isn't a teacher bashing post it's just hard to give an opinion either way without more context

BigGreen · 19/01/2021 07:35

Behind that twat of a parent there's a whole army of us that are really grateful Thanks

Dee1975 · 19/01/2021 07:58

Sounds like you went over and above anyway so why worry about it?
You can have ‘complaints’ made about you in all lines of work.
I understand it’s really frustrating for you especially as you put yourself out so much. But don’t worry about it. You did nothing wrong! You sound like a great teacher!

StrictlyAFemaleFemale · 19/01/2021 08:53

I think youre bloody marvellous and incredibly fair if it helps Flowers

QueenoftheAir · 19/01/2021 09:15

I feel your pain, @Tanaria

The current conditions are bringing out some very nasty entitled behaviour from pupils & parents. Who seem to forget that teachers are human beings in exactly the same situation as everyone else.

I hope the school has your back. The complaint is so utterly ridiculous that I can't believe it won't be (politely) rejected out of hand. Flowers

And I'd love to know on what grounds the 7% of MN 'voters' think that the OP is BU.

PhryneP · 19/01/2021 12:55

I'd wait and see how the Head/SLT respond. If they are supportive of you then sod the parent. If they aren't think of moving somewhere more supportive. I hope today is a better day
I hope the SLT in my children's school are supportive of teachers against mad parents

dublingirl66 · 19/01/2021 14:07

They should be politely telling these fkcers to back off

Teachers are working so hard and have done so much great work last term
Get a grip !!!

Butterymuffin · 19/01/2021 14:21

@BigGreen

Behind that twat of a parent there's a whole army of us that are really grateful Thanks
This! Flowers
Constanttaxiservice · 19/01/2021 14:33

This is so sad. Please don't leave the profession. That would be such a big loss. Try to ignore this ridiculous complaint. As others have said, if SLT don't back you up, change jobs!

Bearnecessity · 19/01/2021 15:31

Oh yes, because it is that easy to just change jobs....especially now....and with a dubious accusation as your most recent work history. Once this type of thing has happened, gone on your work record....you are barely employable. This is why teachers leave and will keep on leaving...

growinggreyer · 19/01/2021 15:47

@Bearnecessity

Oh yes, because it is that easy to just change jobs....especially now....and with a dubious accusation as your most recent work history. Once this type of thing has happened, gone on your work record....you are barely employable. This is why teachers leave and will keep on leaving...
Lol, that is a bit of a reach, don't you think? This is a storm in a teacup. I'm sure it will all be forgotten about by next Monday.
Bearnecessity · 19/01/2021 16:18

I hope so for the Op's sake but there are hundreds of ex-teachers out there who have had similar happen and have lost/left their jobs over something so bloomin' minuscule that was overblown out of all proportion and there is nothing Lol about losing your professional reputation, job, profession you have trained for and love to do and the ability to support your own family. These 'daft' parents create all kinds of damage...

Foxyloxy1plus1 · 19/01/2021 16:21

When there are insufficient teachers to do the job, perhaps people will actually realise that the constant scrutiny, paperwork, data, plus everything that’s been added in the last year, is beyond what can be expected of people who have lives and families.

Buddytheelf85 · 19/01/2021 16:26

I wonder what they think should have happened instead. Even if you’d responded it wouldn’t have made any difference because the test had finished?

Buddytheelf85 · 19/01/2021 16:35

Let us know how that goes. Teachers don't have the monopoly on unfounded complaints

**

That poster didn’t express themselves in the best way, but it’s important not to fall into ‘grass is greener’ syndrome.

PhryneP · 19/01/2021 18:01

Once this type of thing has happened, gone on your work record....you are barely employable
You think that because the op took 30 mins to reply to a child after a lesson had finished and during her breaktime she's going to be unable to change jobs and will be barely employable? It's not helpful to the op to say things like that.

Bearnecessity · 19/01/2021 18:25

No that is not what I said Phryne, read it again I think you'll find my post was in wholehearted support of the Op and your email that is less than helpful.

Saoirse7 · 19/01/2021 18:34

Surely your SLT will back you, ypu have already went above and beyond. If your SLT have any sense they'll dismiss the complaint as ridiculous. You don't work for the parents.

I do completely emphasis with you though on the teaching front. I am currently retraining in order to leave teaching. It's honestly not worth the stress, it is not a well paid job despite the level of training and there are relatively few perks. Being off on maternity made me see another side to life.

This pandemic will result in a chronic shortage of teachers, even more so than the one that currently exists. The distain that some people on social media talk about teachers is disgusting.

hansgrueber · 19/01/2021 19:13

I once got a complaint of racial discrimoination made against me. Apparently I had had the temerity to demand that a boy put his already 2 weeks late coursework on my desk by 9am on Monday morning or he would not be entered for the exam. It really hit the fan, how very dare I treat an Asian boy like this, etc etc.. The rest of the class however, mainly Asian defended my actions to the Head, they had all had their work in on time and the matter was quietly dropped but it stayed as a complaint on my record. Had I been applying for another job it would probably have scuppered my chances.

LolaSmiles · 19/01/2021 20:17

And I'd love to know on what grounds the 7% of MN 'voters' think that the OP is BU
I can probably guess.

  • OP is a teacher
  • OP hasn't been available 24/7
  • OP should realise that the main part of their role is to bend around whenever students feel like doing work
  • OP had a break and some mumsnetters think teachers having a cup of tea between online teaching and other work is sign that teachers are doing nothing
  • Their friends have told them that the private school down the road has told teachers to have all online learning apps on their phones and to be contactable at all times. These teachers do this because they care about the students and the education, whereas state sector teachers are a bit useless, lazy and looking for any reason not to do their job
Bearnecessity · 19/01/2021 20:52

The 7% are probably the same ones who complained about me asking a mother to help her daughter with her writing at home as she had never been to school before, she was 7. The mother sent in two pages of A4 denigrating me to my Head. My contract was not renewed that year. Or as happened to one of my colleagues, a mother stood in the Head's office shrieking that my colleague was a terrible teacher because her daughter had only got 9/10 that week for her spellings and not 10/10. The ensuing discussion and arguments led to said colleague leaving and retraining as a nurse. Or another colleague who lightly tapped a student messing round with a newly fixed smart board with a few sheets of paper on their head, keen to not have the newly fixed board broken for another six months. Mother played merry hell about the 'abuse' and 'hitting' of her son.....that teacher left that day and never went back. I could go on...

Fembot123 · 19/01/2021 20:57

Do you have to be premium to see the vote, I see nothing 😂 I’ve worked in schools for several years now but not as a teacher and the malicious complaints have touched everyone of my colleagues over the years, I don’t know what is wrong with some parents. My elder dcs are in senior school and I’ve never complained about anything, it would have to be something pretty serious for me to pick up the phone/email and my first port of call would be with the teacher

1FootInTheRave · 19/01/2021 21:10

I know how you feel.

I see some of the complaints in my line of work and have little faith left.

I am an nhs midwife and tbh, it's absolutely shit.

Bearnecessity · 19/01/2021 21:16

I had heard that about midwifery....you have got my sympathies, another job that has periods where they struggle to recruit.