To be stressed out by the amount of toys DS has..

[angelwings88]

I have 1 DS who has just turned 4. We live in a 3 bed, it's not the biggest - living room, kitchen, a conservatory that is freezing this time of year, our room, DS's room which is small and the spare room that is an office for DH/dressing room/spare bed as PIL live abroad so stay with us. So room is tight.
I had a cull of toys before Christmas as DS birthday is right afterwards. Last year I had to buy a new toy box after Xmas and I've just had to buy some shelving off Amazon to accommodate all the shit gifts he was given.
Honestly I can't move for stuff, not just small toys but huge 3ft long car tracks which doesn't dismantle and fits nowhere. The conservatory is a playroom but it's not ideal as we just have a convector heater in there. His bedroom is chock a block. I see next door who have 3 children and they have nothing in the conservatory and their house is so tidy and ours is just toys where ever you look!
I'm not ungrateful And DS loves them - I'm aware it's a "first world problem" but please make me feel I'm not the only one who feels this way and any suggestions are welcome!

Do you have a loft? I do a rotation pretty frequently, anything not played with for a few weeks goes up there, and if it doesn't get played with again it gets sold or given away.

I had a big storage box that was filled with toys and went in the loft for 6 months just before his birthday. Then at 3 months I would bring it out, empty it, refill it and up it would go again. It basically meant he ended up with 'new' toys every 3 months.

We also would charity shop that didn't fit in the toy chest. You end up with so much, that is essentially duplicates, that the kids can't even play because they're bewildered by the choice.

Our house was much calmer and toys were played with a lot more once we got a bit stricter.

I think that's also arou lnd the age that I started offering him 10p for each toy that he donated. He'd usually end up with a couple of quid that he'd spend on absolute crap from the pound shop. But I end up with 2 small toys instead of 20 big ones so it still worked for me. And both my kids now understand that you can't keep everything and sometimes it's better to get rid.

Get your son out for a walk with somebody. While he's gone, get a bin bag and fill it with everything you hate and that you know he doesn't play with frequently. Once that bag is full, take it either up to the attic or to a charity shop/tip. Sorted. Zero guilt. Don't keep anything that you think is ugly or pointless.

I second the 20 for one idea, or at least 10 for one.

Before birthdays or Christmas, make detailed suggestions to any friends or family who want to buy gifts. Lego or kid k'nex are great as once they've played with a new set you can just add it to the collection (one big box can hold years worth of gifts). Craft stuff is another one of our go to's as once it's used up it's gone, but only if you DS is into making and you have time to facilitate, otherwise it will sit unused taking up space. Also if they have a set budget (DM likes to spend the same on all GC) then I steer towards one toy and some clothes instead of a sack of toys.

This can stem the tide of toys coming in to your, then you need to get rid of stuff at the same rate as it's accumulating. We have a kallax dedicated to toy storage, and a one in one out policy so if it doesn't all fit in the shelves, something has to go.

@00100001. Floor-to-ceiling storage is for clothes, books, sewing-machine, papers, shoes, tools, household stuff, linen, towels etc. as well, not just toys .

Toys take up a double cupboard and a couple of boxes under the bed, as well as the loft ones.

Through I know on Mumsnet having more than a small toybox of wooden figures can be an abomination . But we like our duplo, talking giraffe, paw patrol toys, car garage, play kitchen, cuddles, jigsaws and tea set... especially now they have a proper home. So we'll keep them, thank you .

Thank you all! I'm so pleased to know IANBU and other people feel this way! DH doesn't care and says he should just be allowed toys all over
I don't know if it's a storage issue or the pure amount of toys, maybe both! He had 2 packed toy boxes in his room, he also has a play kitchen and a huge paw patrol tower in there and I have no idea how many cuddly toys.
In the conservatory don't even ask haha. Two more full toy boxes and a shelf unit and giant plastic monstrosities all over!

Can you get a radiator fitted in any conservatory? We were looking at a new roof to try to solve the issue of it being freezing but it's very expensive.

I think we'll try the get rid of 10/20 old toys for one new toy idea! We have a loft but it's only half boarded meaning it tiny and is full of Christmas things, and just general old stuff. DH says it's jam packed although I've never been up there. Might be a project to clear it out. We have a garage though that I could put things to see if they're missed or not.

I've seen the soft toy nets on Amazon which might free up some space in his room.

Thank god it's another year until Christmas!

@HelgaDownUnder

They grow out of huge toys really quickly. Mine are 11, 10 and 7. Four years ago our house was an explosion of tat, now they all fit in one, smallish cupboard. By all means start culling, but it won't last forever. Large trucks are especially cluttering and especially short-lived in appeal.

It did cross my mind that one day I might miss him loving toys like he does now. I suppose when you're buried under a toy mountain it's hard to remember it won't last forever!

DS should be easy. He loves lego. Obsessed with it. But sil, bil and mil refuse to buy it. I haven't the slightest idea why. He's got stuff from them which he played with once and just forgotten about - because he just goes back to lego!
I've just asked him if he remembers what his aunty bought him for Christmas. No idea. Asked him what his uncle (my brother) bought him (very cool ninjago set) and he told me instantly!
Tldr - the mountain of crap drives me mad. Like you very small bedroom.
One thing which you may not be able to do - we replaced the conservatory (playroom) roof with a warm roof which has made such a difference.

how old are the neighbours children? i assume a little older?
my youngest is 10 and apart from a mnountain of lego and some board games no-one in the house plays with toys anymore.
However when they were smaller our conservatory was bursting with toys.
We also had the problem that our rubbish conservatory was freezing in winter so we had a large shelf unit in there and toys were in plastic boxes so eg marble run in a box, ocotnauts, trains, hatchimals, toy food in a box etc. that meant they could pick a box to play with and bring it into the lounge. then it was tidied away and put back in the conservatory. larger things just went on the shelves as is or on the floor. We had a big toy box for train track.

Agree with others. You need to get rid of stuff. I find my kids play better when there are less toys. He doesnt need 20 soft toys. 5 will be enough etc...
If grandparents want to buy big toys, that's great. They can keep it at theirs and you child can play with it when he visits them (works if they dont live too far!).

Can the giant plastic monstrosities move out to the garage and come in on rotation? Or can you put some wall hooks/big shelves up in the conservatory so they're all stored off the floor?

We have deep shelves above the doors in our house. Great place to put bulky things that only get used occasionally like my sewing-machine.

Same issue here and it’s only me and 1 DS living in the house! I got so worked up about it after Christmas I had a bit of a meltdown over it (which in hindsight was ridiculous but honest feelings at the time)

Once everything has a home and I’ve done my bi-annual clear out I feel a lot better. I also made a point of saying to some family members who are known for Giving my DS giant bags of gifts Each birthday/Christmas that we simply don’t have the space and one gift would be absolutely fine in future. I’m grateful but I really don’t have space for all these giant cars and trucks, and all the toys with little bits get lost making the toys useless.

It’s a storage issue ! We have small 3 bed too and a 7 and 2 year old . We bought the storage units in IKEA and basically turned our front room in to a playroom .
The big toys - kitchen , doll houses etc are on the floor and on top of the units and all the rest of the toys in the units . We also have a huge shelving unit that stores all the jigsaws , books and games .
Kitchen we use one big press that stores all the arts and crafts .
It’s like a Creche but it’s tidy

We divided toys into 2 lots, and put 1 lot in the loft. We swopped them over every 4 months or so, getting rid of anything that hadn't been played with.
For us it worked really well- when toy changeover day arrived again it was like Christmas. Maybe worth a try if you are feeling over run?

1. Our conservatory has been made bearable with roof blinds/side blinds (just thermal roller blinds from Dunelm) and a sort of wall mounted fan heater on a thermostat.

1. your DS is little enough you can make decisions on his toys. You know that actually if you put/gave 3/4 of them away, he'd still play happily with what was left.

Unfortunately the sort of toys that appeal to grandparents and are sold everywhere often don't have good value. Big plastic monstrosities that only do one thing. Fragile kits and tracks that need an adult to assemble them. Novelty books with batteries in or toys stuck in them. Awful "craft" kits that are actually junky and don't give a very good result. Add outgrown toys to that and you soon get overwhelmed.

If you think about what is a reasonable collection of toys, allowing for some growing and keeping of old favourites, don't have any emotional attachment to the surplus, no matter who gave you it or if it's still unopened. It's actually detracting as it makes it hard for your child to focus and find things and for you all to have space to play and tidy up afterwards. the only game is "toy warehouse management" .
My boys would have loved the Tomy/Thomas plastic railway and I know people with amazing collections, but we had wooden railway first and I decided it was better to have one good set expanded than two non compatible ones that did the same thing.

My 6yo has loads of toys and it drives me bonkers as he doesnt really play with them anymore since discovering minecraft but now my 1 year old has taken an interest in them now so it will be another few years before I can get rid of them. However, if she takes an interest in Thomas the Tank Engine, I'll be very happy as we have loads of that stuff and it will save a fortune

I feel your pain OP. We have a general rule of thumb with gifts, both from us and others, that toys should be usable for multiple things, if possible. That way the grow out of and change over tends to be less. Things like dress up stuff takes up little storage as do playmobile and lego. I also ask people not to buy soft toys and dolls , because my DC do not play with these, they have a couple of favourites, which they chose and show no interest in others, so no point. We are also lucky, because my parents live in a country town with a good charity shop (independent) and the ladies who run it are lovely and make a big fuss of 'kind children who bring in toys/books they are to grown up for, for others to enjoy!' and give them a sticker and chocolate, so they love a clear out when we can visit Granny and Lula!

Would you consider getting a proper roof put on your conservatory? It would make the room much warmer. It seems like wasted space at the minute?

@OhTheTastyNuts

Would you consider getting a proper roof put on your conservatory? It would make the room much warmer. It seems like wasted space at the minute?

Definitely, I say exactly the same thing but DH is a bit apprehensive because of the cost and he wants to move eventually. I said it might appeal to potential buyers and give us a couple more years in this house as he can use it as an office if it's not freezing/boiling! Think we're going to get a quote once lockdown eases.

Thank you everyone for your replies. It's nice to know I'm not the only one who gets stressed by these things! I've managed to get rid of a couple of bin liners worth of smaller toys today and been looking at storage ideas. I suppose Rome wasn't built in a day!