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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not expect neighbour to use washing machine overnight

583 replies

BornInTheWrongCentury · 17/01/2021 09:39

Just that really. Over the last couple of months our neighbours started using their washing machine/tumble dryer overnight, it was going on on at about midnight and stays on till around 3am.

My husband asked a them politely a few weeks ago when he saw them outside if they’d mind changing the time they have it on as it really disturbs us. We’re in a mid terraced house and they are the end of the terrace. Their kitchen is below our bedroom. The previous occupants took out a wall in their kitchen that separated the kitchen from their hallway so it’s open planned now so all sound from their house is amplified now anyway and noise seems to travel up the wall into our bedroom.

After my husband mentioned it to them they stopped for a couple of weeks but now the noise has started again as they are putting a wash on at about 10pm and it finishes at 1am.

It’s really upsetting me that I can’t go to bed and read/fall asleep in peace until at least 1am now.

If it’s relevant we own our house and their house is social housing. They are the end of the terrace so if I complain to the council or their housing association they will know it’s me. They are the kind of couple who seem ok as long as you’re on the right side of them but they are rather loud and look very intimidating and to be honest I don’t want to make things worse or get into an argument with them.

They are pretty good neighbours apart from this issue as in the only other noise we hear is their children (they have very screechy, door slamming children but I can cope with that during the day!) They don’t have parties or play thumping music - it’s just the issue with not being able to go to sleep when I want to. I don’t know if I’m just being over sensitive where I so tired.

What would you do?

YABU - just be grateful it’s nothing worse than a washing machine and try to ignore it/go to bed later when you know you’ll fall straight to sleep

YANBU - be brave and speak to them again asking them to not use after 11pm and complain to the council if they refuse?

OP posts:
copernicium · 17/01/2021 22:31

I don't understand how so many people claim not to be annoyed by this!

My NDN runs her washing machine between about 3 and 5am alternate nights. Earplugs wouldn't make any difference as it makes vibrations, especially the final spin.

It drives me insane. YANBU!

hellejuice91 · 17/01/2021 22:35

I can remember my Husband once told me (in response to our neighbour doing DIY at 7am on a Saturday morning every few weeks when we lived in a terrace house) to let it go and then they will let it go when you are too loud on occasion. He was right.

I understand it is frustrating and I know things are worse when you are tired, but using the washing machine during the night is not unreasonable as as PP has said, sometimes it can be cheaper. If they had kids they may also have a lot of washing to do and that genuinely be the best time to do it.

Bambam2019 · 17/01/2021 22:54

Not at all a snob thank you- I am in a terraced house myself, and grew up in one. I absolutely love my house not that I have to justify that to you. But actually yes I realise that I DO have to put up with noise from time to time. Next doors house is for sale and requires a lot of work- I understand that I bought the house knowing the neighbour (bought from my mum) and knew that one day I would have to put up with noise as a result!
I just think anti social behaviour is a lot worse than someone using their washing machine at that time.
I’ll be bringing my children up to be considerate of all, as I genuinely believe I am myself, but then again has OP or yourself considered that in this case the neighbours have their own needs..?
Also, referring back to your original comment about terraced houses and snobbery....many terraced houses sell for 500K plus in some areas, much more than some detached houses in other areas.....owning any home is a great achievement in my book!

bruffin · 17/01/2021 22:56

@hellejuice91

I can remember my Husband once told me (in response to our neighbour doing DIY at 7am on a Saturday morning every few weeks when we lived in a terrace house) to let it go and then they will let it go when you are too loud on occasion. He was right.

I understand it is frustrating and I know things are worse when you are tired, but using the washing machine during the night is not unreasonable as as PP has said, sometimes it can be cheaper. If they had kids they may also have a lot of washing to do and that genuinely be the best time to do it.

So its ok to kerp people awake at 1 am in the morning
Bambam2019 · 17/01/2021 22:59

However I do understand OPs frustration as sleep deprivation is awful! Maybe remind the neighbours and let them know your circumstances and you might find they have their own circumstances and you can come to an agreement?

Nanny0gg · 17/01/2021 23:34

@thosetalesofunexpected

Hi Op 😕Sound Cancelling headphones are your best friend in your kind of situation.
How do you sleep in those??
Nanny0gg · 17/01/2021 23:36

@hellejuice91

I can remember my Husband once told me (in response to our neighbour doing DIY at 7am on a Saturday morning every few weeks when we lived in a terrace house) to let it go and then they will let it go when you are too loud on occasion. He was right.

I understand it is frustrating and I know things are worse when you are tired, but using the washing machine during the night is not unreasonable as as PP has said, sometimes it can be cheaper. If they had kids they may also have a lot of washing to do and that genuinely be the best time to do it.

Of COURSE it's unreasonable!

That's why councils tell you what times you can make noise and what times you can't!

Why should the OP suffer disrupted sleep because of inconsiderate neighbours?

sneakysnoopysniper · 17/01/2021 23:59

Try wax rather than foam ear plugs. You can make a pair last a week with care. A box should last a month so hardly a major expense. Also try sleeping with the radio tuned to one of those music channels with no yapping. Or white noise.

These are lifestyle differences and you cant expect people to change that for you. I had an old woman lived in the flat beneath when I was in my 20s. I didnt play loud music or have parties as these were against the rules. However she moaned because I was usually up til 1 oe 2 am (I am a nightowl) and she said that she "could not relax until she heard me go to bed as she was afraid I was going to wake her up if she dropped off."

She even complained to the committee (it was a resident run HA) and they quickly put her straight on the fact that I was not breaking the lease so there was nothing they could do. In the end we did negotiate an arrangement whereby I prepared supper etc so I did not have to bang about in the kitchen but no way was I going to let another person dictate what time I went to bed.

MissMarpleDarling · 18/01/2021 00:00

YABVU.

notangelinajolie · 18/01/2021 00:03

Move.

GoldieHelen · 18/01/2021 01:10

Op, the mistake you made with the thread was to mention HA.

Post again in a few weeks/months time and see how different the responses are

squeekums · 18/01/2021 04:39

YABU
I do my laundry around my work, sometimes thats day, some its night
I would laugh if my neighbours wanted me to do washing on their terms in my own house

ColdCottage · 18/01/2021 05:08

YANBU plus running washing machines, dishwashers overnight is a fire hazard.

www.cheshirefire.gov.uk/public-safety/home-safety/washing-machine-and-dishwasher-fire-safety

My friend is a firefighter and said it's one of the main reasons they go out to fires.

Maybe lead with this?

copernicium · 18/01/2021 07:31

@hellejuice91 not necessarily. The neighbours who use their washing machine in the middle of the night complained as I had a shopping delivery at 10pm last week. Some people are just very self centred.

gutful · 18/01/2021 07:39

I think you need to move to a detached property if the sound of your neighbours just going about living their lives bothers you this much.

PurpleMustang · 18/01/2021 07:51

For the amount of tumble dryers that have caught fire i would speak to them and let the washing machine slide but insist that they do not use the tumble dryer unless someone is home and awake. It is such a huge risk

Incrediblytired · 18/01/2021 07:57

I get that it’s annoying but they’re probably running it at night because the electricity is cheaper for them - it’s January and everyone is skint in January so they probably need to.

I really get that it’s annoying but I also don’t think you can force them to change

OnNaturesCourse · 18/01/2021 08:04

What kind of washing machine and dryer are they using?! Or how thin are you walls?

YABU I would think without knowing the above.

I have a 1600 spin washer, and a 9kg dryer that is on most nights. My washer is in the kitchen which shares a wall with my neighbor, and my dryer is on the other wall which is against my other neighbor. The set ups in their house are similar and we never hear theirs on, night or day. Our bedrooms are directly above and we only hear a gentle hum of the dryer.

Used to live in a flat that all was all electric and it cost a bomb to run washing machine during the day but pennies at night. We did only have a 1400 spin, but used it every night as did my upstair neighbours. We could hear it but again it was only a low noise.

We are private renters and I find your need to mention their housing situation quite odd in this case. Do you not like social housing, do you believe someone who owned the house wouldn't have the cheek to disturb your sleep?

Caspianberg · 18/01/2021 09:23

It’s tricky to not use washing machine or tumble dryer only when home and awake. Until recently I used to work 7am-7pm, so out 6.30am -7.30/8pm. I would be knackered and go to bed around 10pm. That leaves very little time mon-fri for people to use machine if I full time work with commute.
We mainly washed laundry on weekend as was just dh and I, but now with baby that would be tricky

BluePeterVag · 18/01/2021 10:06

@PurpleMustang

For the amount of tumble dryers that have caught fire i would speak to them and let the washing machine slide but insist that they do not use the tumble dryer unless someone is home and awake. It is such a huge risk
Insist? Please give OP ideas on how she may insist her neighbours do what she wants? This isn’t some 18 century novel where the better off can insist that the plebs can do their bidding.
PeggyHill · 18/01/2021 10:14

@PurpleMustang

For the amount of tumble dryers that have caught fire i would speak to them and let the washing machine slide but insist that they do not use the tumble dryer unless someone is home and awake. It is such a huge risk
You can't "insist" that someone changes their behaviour in their own home. All you can do is ask. It's up to them what they do.
ZenNudist · 18/01/2021 10:18

Move. Unfortunately this is what you get in a terraced house. You can't tell your neighbours what to do!

minipie · 18/01/2021 10:21

@ZenNudist

Move. Unfortunately this is what you get in a terraced house. You can't tell your neighbours what to do!
Yes, I’m sure the OP can just magic up the extra money to move to a detached house Hmm
LaBellina · 18/01/2021 10:26

[quote thosetalesofunexpected]**@LaBellina

"You don't get to dictate when I do my Laundrey"

@LaBellina
Its called being a Consirdate Neighbours.!

You sound like you could be someone's idea of a Anti social Neighbour.![/quote]
You on the other hand, sound like a very lovely person Hmm.

mumto2teenagers · 18/01/2021 10:33

I think your neighbours do seem quite reasonable, your DH asked them to stop running the machine in the middle of the night and they complied with his request.

If the machine was starting at midnight previously, they probably assumed that you are still up at that time so thought by bringing it forward to 10pm it would be finished by the time you go to bed, therefore would not be an issue.

Assuming they are running it at night to save money then I think it's unreasonable for you to insist they run it outside of the cheap time, however it still might be worth having a chat with them. 3 hours seems a very long cycle for someone who is trying to save money.

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