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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To be delighted that my previous bos who "didn't agree with women with small children working" is pregnant?

36 replies

MrsSchadenfreude · 28/10/2007 08:52

She made my life a misery for three years, making comments about wone with small children being a complete pain in the arse in the workplace as they were always having time off to deal with ill children/school holidays etc.
To the extent that I used to dose up the DDs with calpol and send them into school as it was easier to go and collect them at break after the school nurse had phoned than to put up with all her tutting and sighing when I phoned in asking for a day's annual leave to look after an ill child.

I am delighted for her, but even more delighted that she will now see what other people go through. I did email her to congratulate her, and she told me she had taken most of the first three months off with morning sickness. I was so tempted to say "That must have been inconvenient for the rest of the team" but I bit my tongue and sympathised (in a Schadenfreude sort of way).

OP posts:

kitsandbits · 28/10/2007 08:56

"That must have been inconvenient for the rest of the team" lol I would've said it!

I really would have!

oxocube · 28/10/2007 08:58

...

ivykaty44 · 28/10/2007 09:01

I bet she will "let the team down" far more than anyone else and winge about people not understanding what it is like trying to juggle life with children.

tribpot · 28/10/2007 09:01

I would have said it too. Along with "hope they manage to find a suitable replacement - I guess it will be easier since it will be permanent and not maternity cover" (since clearly she can't intend to continue, given women with small children shouldn't work).

TinyGang · 28/10/2007 09:07

Love it! Enjoy.

I'd be practising my concerned and yet strangely 'sphinxlike' expression in front of the mirror for all I was worth if I were you

kittywitch · 28/10/2007 09:10

Excellent. Do you feel that you could ask her whether she has changed her mind on women with small children working.
I would. I'd ask it in a direct, interested, no hidden agenda sort of way.

What goes around comes around or something.....

WideWebWitch · 28/10/2007 09:17

Oh FANTASTIC, I didn't dream this would be you, is this vile woman from past holiday refusals? See, revenge also comes to those who stand and wait (to mix my proverbs!)

I love it when judgemental childless women get what's coming to them. And you don't work for her anymore do you? (btw, do say hello if you meet me, I think you and I may well be on the same trains next week, commuting from cmk to euston?)

DuchesseDeVil · 28/10/2007 09:24

hehe

Growing up time for Ms Evil... Perhaps she'll learn some tolerance along the way.

No, you are most definitely NOT being unreasonable.

Nightynight · 28/10/2007 09:33

wish my evil childless neighbours would get pregnant too.

WideWebWitch · 28/10/2007 09:35

Aren't you tempted to send her an email saying "I remember you held strong views and thought that women with children shouldn't work, so just wondered when you're planning to leave"

LoveAngel · 28/10/2007 09:39

Excellent! YANBU. You must slip in a dig ...oh, go on, you know you want to!

Kitsandbits · 28/10/2007 09:41

Id say something like ...

"Were you not worried when you took the first 3 months off because of morning sickness? I know I would have been, it was always frowned upon when I took time off due to 'child related' problems.

Theres not much sympathy for working mums in the office is there? Or there certainly wasn't when I was trying to be a mum and work too."

cazboldy · 28/10/2007 09:42

She may understand what it was like for you, or equally she could still think the same thing and get someone else to look after her child like a nanny?? a boss of mine was like this. I worked with horses, and chose not to ride when I was pg.She moaned incessantly about how "inconvenient " it was etc.
When she got pg, i laughed to myself and thought "now we'll see" but she just carried on, and left her 4 day old dd with a nanny she had employed before she was born! Now the little girl is 8 and goes to boarding school. I feel so for her.

Original poster

MrsSchadenfreude · 28/10/2007 10:24

WWW - yes, that's the one! I don't work for her anymore and did email her to ask her if she needed a nanny recommendation, or if she was going to give up work. She hasn't replied, funnily enough.

I am usually on the 0744 from Wolverton.

OP posts:

WideWebWitch · 28/10/2007 18:54

Fantastic! Your name is wonderfully apt at times like this.

Ah, I will be on an earlier train so sadly won't be seeing you but never mind!

Califright · 28/10/2007 18:57

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

rookiemum · 28/10/2007 19:02

Oh that is beyond fantastic.

Was going to type more but can't do so for fear that anyone from my work knows who I am.

Do let us know if she gets back to you.

harpsicorpsecarrier · 28/10/2007 19:07

the wheels of God turn slowly and all that. I would definitely comment about the morning sickness bit... I don't think I could resist!
how aptly named you are

ScottishMummy · 28/10/2007 19:13

as tempting as it undoutably must be to amke a pippy comment - hold off. what goes around comes around, now she too faces balancing work/sick child/unsympathetic ogre boss...wonder if she will recall her pre-baby mutterings

god as long as she does not turn into a pneumatic/nurturing/im-am-woman-i-am-mother like reformed smokers who get all preachey.

screamsprout · 28/10/2007 19:19

Oh fab. And she is still only pregnant - she has NO idea!!!

Heh heh

WanderingTrolley · 28/10/2007 19:21

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA

inthegutter · 28/10/2007 19:26

Make the most of it - you've got lots of mileage!! In my experience, the women who are totally career focused and look down on working mums are absolutely the worst when they get pregnant themselves, probably because they're such control freaks. I worked with someone exactly like you describe - she wasn't my boss but a colleague, and she was forever making comments to put down working mums. Then she got pregnant and OMG.... I've never known any one take so much time off with morning sickness! She also talked NON STOP about her pregnancy/birth plan etc etc and of course, once she'd given birth (NOT the natural birth she'd gone on about ad nauseum hee hee!!) she then negotiated to work part time!! So much for her pre-baby views!

ScottishMummy · 28/10/2007 19:32

i knwe someone who went from being all career-career-career to being a i-am-woman/earth goddess preachey pain-in-da-ass...i don't know what was worse

in fairness who honestly had a Clue^ what this being a mum shenanigans was about not i so cut the woman a bit o slack now she is up the duf

Original poster

MrsSchadenfreude · 28/10/2007 22:06

I am still smirking. Friend told me that former boss has just been offered her dream job on contract for a year. She has told them that she is in pig - before she had signed any contract - just when the verbal offer had been made on the phone. How bright is that?

WWW I am usually on the 1723 (on a good day) or the 1755 back from Euston, if you would care to join me on a squashed train. (Squashed as in overcrowded.)

OP posts:

Hallowedam · 28/10/2007 22:10

LOLOL. How satisfying that must be! Have you sympathised with her and mentioned how important it is to have a supportive boss when you are dealing with this kind of thing?

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