Birthday present etiquette

[Wingingitatlifesincebirth]

One of siblings has suddenly stopped buying a birthday present for my husband, they have in recent years made a difference in gifting for my family including my kids and generally shown very little interest in me compared to my other siblings and their kids.

I haven’t stopped buying for Sibling or partner make absolutely no difference in gift giving. There hasn’t been any discussion about this the sibling suddenly just stopped- so I what I want to ask if do I treat them the same way they treat me ? Or continue to be the bigger person and still buy gifts and acknowledge birthdays ?

Your sibling? If so can't you just talk to them?

We don't exchange gifts with siblings' other halves. Perhaps they just want to stop because of finances, so they have stopped quietly? I agree with above that the best way forward is to ask.

I don't do presents for siblings or their partners. I send a card usually though

I’d just say to them that you think it’s time to stop buying for each other and family now. If your other siblings still exchange gifts with your family, then I would carry on doing so with them.

I don't buy for siblings partners - maybe the odd bottle of wine if happened to be seeing them on the day but that's it. I'd let it go and you know it to buy for their partners in future? 🤷‍♀️

You don't really need a family conference over whether to buy a gift for in-laws. Buy - don't buy - it doesn't matter! AS you clearly resent it enough to post here, I'd say don't buy.

Yeah bottle of alcohol If I see them otherwise nothing. Always send a lovey card though and mine a present if it's a big one like 30th etc

You could well be my SIL, but she doesn't have kids, so maybe not.

We've stopped buying for SIL's husband (nothing for last Christmas, his birthday or this Christmas) as he doesn't really participate in family life. Before Christmas 2019, I just saw him in the July when we returned from a holiday with them, PIL, BIL, his wife & their kids. He decided on Christmas Eve that he wouldn't be attending Christmas Day lunch at BIL's house. We've seen him twice since then, briefly. Not once has he asked after any of us and he removed himself from the family group chat.

If SIL asked DH or me why we don't buy for him, I would gladly explain that we only buy for those who we are close to and spend time with. There are extended family members we have more to do with than him who we don't but for...

Just ask your sibling

On the next birthday in their family, I'd text and say "Hi X, I know we've stopped doing presents but just wanted to send happy birthday wishes for the day".

For the children, I'd probably continue treating them the same as any other nephews and nieces. Not their fault if their parents are awkward buggers.