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Original poster

To consider trying to organise a zoom 40th?

26 replies

DavidNowie · 14/01/2021 11:07

It’s my 40th soon, I want a party! I’m considering trying to organise a zoom thing with 6-8 friends but I don’t want it to be awkward, do you think it would be dry and excruciating? It could it be fun? has anyone seen any professionally organised ones? I’m happy to splash out? Or has anyone organised anything? Any ideas?

OP posts:
Sway19 · 14/01/2021 11:09

Organising your own 40th, how very sad! Has no one offered to do something for you?

SlippersForFlippers · 14/01/2021 11:16

Some companies do quizzes, scavenger hunts, murder mysteries, escape rooms etc via zoom.

Might not be the party you want but online activities mean people are participating and it's not so awkward.

isthatatree · 14/01/2021 12:03

Ignore the person who said it is sad to organise your own party, why not organise your own.

I would attend but think it would be best to have an activity like PP suggested, just to avoid awkwardness that video calls bring talking over each other!

elQuintoConyo · 14/01/2021 12:06

Yes, why not? But as a pp said, do an activity that lasts between 1-1.5 hours, anything longer gives me backache and a numb bum!

I'm part of a group of friends (some old, some new!) and we have a weekly sewing zoom, a Stitch and Bitch, if you will. It's lovely to connect with a reason, if it's just chatting with a glass of something, then it'd get boring very quickly.

Brighterthansunflowers · 14/01/2021 12:06

Obviously you know your friends and whether they would enjoy this. But I think many people are fed up of zoom/Skype/Teams calls at this point. I think a professionally organised one would be a bit cringey tbh

Workyticket · 14/01/2021 12:09

We have a 'shit day' work friends group.

If one of us is struggling we shout up and however many people are free jump on to a Teams call at night with their drink of choice and snacks.

Had one Friday, another tonight. I bloody love them.

Sometimes we do a quiz, often it's just a chat and a laugh.

Do it op - I'd come!

M0rT · 14/01/2021 12:09

Definitely do it and go for an activity as pp said.
It's hard to not talk over people on Zoom if it's more than about 4 people so easier to have an activity.
You can pay for escape room, cocktail making etc or there are some board games online you can do together from phones, including cards against humanity Grin
A quiz where all the questions are about 40?
Loads of options.
Happy BirthdayFlowers

Tier10 · 14/01/2021 12:09

Loving the sound of stitch and bitch.

Newmooon · 14/01/2021 12:11

@SlippersForFlippers

Some companies do quizzes, scavenger hunts, murder mysteries, escape rooms etc via zoom.

Might not be the party you want but online activities mean people are participating and it's not so awkward.

Macmillan do them for free (well a small donation)
DappledThings · 14/01/2021 12:13

I've been to one Zoom 40th. There were a lot of children there too and there was a guy coordinating it with some games and stuff. It was a bit cringy and full of the usual issues with people not being able to hear anything etc.

For just adults it would be even more cringy I fear.

Maybe try to book in a call with a few people and suggest they bring drinks and snacks but anything more than half an hour will probably get really awkward.

TeeBee · 14/01/2021 12:15

I went to someone's 40th zoom party at the beginning of the first lockdown. It was quite good actually. We did drinking games and quizzes. Was actually quite funny and I'd never met any of them before. Better than staying at home staring at the walls OP. It's not sad at all to organise yourself a party. That's just a stupid comment.

Workyticket · 14/01/2021 12:16

I honestly don't get people saying no more than an hour etc and activities needed!

Jumped on ours at 8 ish last week, some had been on since half 7. 2 of us were still on putting the world to rights at midnight

I love talking to my friends. I wish we could meet up but this is the next best thing

AnyTimeSoon · 14/01/2021 12:18

You know your friends best. I personally think its cringy. It also can become annoyingly awkward with connection issues and repeating yourself , everyone speaking over each other. I guess if you and your friends enjoy these types of interactions then there's nothing wrong with it.

Foobydoo · 14/01/2021 12:18

I would put your effort into planning at 41st with the 1 crossed out kind of thing for next year with a small zoom thing for close friends this year. My friendship group have tried zoom events and it us hard work anything more than an hour gets boring quickly, so less people and a good chat would be better than a larger thing.

peak2021 · 14/01/2021 12:20

Don't do it, the idea of something for your 41st is better.

TheDogsMother · 14/01/2021 12:22

We had a Zoom wedding on the date that it should have been. Everyone dressed up, one of the guests was also the 'vicar' to conduct the ceremony and we had fizz and canapes after. Everyone was very hungover from the Zoom hen and stag do the evening before Grin.

As others are saying you could do a quiz (maybe Jay's virtual pub quiz, the guy off Radio 2). For DH's birthday recently I organised a London Tour guide to do a Zoom tour around all his haunts from when he worked in Clerkenwell and Soho. We invited friends to join us. Good fun but less opportunity to interact.

ShakespearesSisters · 14/01/2021 12:24

We had a zoom new years eve party. 8 households. We all did 10 questions for a quiz and did games in between. The "host" dropped us off gift bags earlier in the week with crackers (how many can you eat in a minute) sprouts (shove them in your mouth and see if people can work out what you are saying) malteasers and straws (quickest to move from plate to bowl). We did a boat race, told which team and which order and it was the quickest team to finish drinks. "I have never", lots of shots involved. We never got round to the one where it was the quickest to whisk an egg white and hold it over your head.
I must say, it was the best new year since I've had kids (as normally involves sitting on the sofa waiting to watch fireworks at midnight)

No reason why this couldn't work for a 40th. But I'd be inclined to invite partners so 2 people on each screen maybe?

afrikat · 14/01/2021 12:32

I have a group of 6 friends and we have done a zoom call for each others 40ths over recent months. They opened the present we all sent them, most of us got dressed up and had a drink. Can easily be fun, go for it!

DappledThings · 14/01/2021 12:45

@Workyticket

I honestly don't get people saying no more than an hour etc and activities needed!

Jumped on ours at 8 ish last week, some had been on since half 7. 2 of us were still on putting the world to rights at midnight

I love talking to my friends. I wish we could meet up but this is the next best thing

That sounds like an already established group of people just moving their pub drinks into the home, which sounds great. We've done that too with a group if 8 of us (4 couples) who have all spent a lot of time together, including weekends away.

But a 40th will involve lots of people who probably don't know each other at all, or only tangentially. Plus the pressure for it to be a special party which is again very different from a regular catch up and chat.

queenofSI · 14/01/2021 12:52

@Sway19

Organising your own 40th, how very sad! Has no one offered to do something for you?
What a shitty snide comment
garlictwist · 14/01/2021 12:59

My friend is organising a Zoom quiz for her birthday and I'm actually really looking forward to it. She is very good at quizzes and I think it will be fun, far better than doing nothing.

Workyticket · 14/01/2021 13:19

Bizarrely not really! Me and 2 others have worked together for a couple of years and we were definitely friends

3 were 'cross paths now and again' colleagues

1 started the week before locckdown 1 so we included her to be nice and discovered she's great

It helps that 1 of my original friends is a natural friend maker.

Honestly, we've been a huge support to each other and we genuinely have fun. Sometimes it's all 7 of us, sometimes 2 or 3.

We're all late 30s / 40s / 50s in professional roles.

Workyticket · 14/01/2021 13:19

sorry, that was in reply to @DappledThings

Original poster
DavidNowie · 14/01/2021 13:22

@Sway19

Organising your own 40th, how very sad! Has no one offered to do something for you?
No and I didn’t think it was sad until now...
OP posts:
CloudPop · 14/01/2021 13:31

Nothing wrong with organising your own 40th, ignore whoever said that.

I think a Zoom party could work just fine. I did one for my birthday last year. Everyone had a few drinks and chatted away for a few hours.

Or one of the activities mentioned previously? Or a wine tasting- everyone buys the wine and then some wine-bore rambles on about them? I went to one and it was actually quite a good laugh

In short - go for it. It's not cringey. It's a good idea.