All in this together

[ProbsAIBU]

AIBU that we are all in this together? I live alone and am single. Understand it is different for everyone but when my married friends say we are all struggling, i find it really hard to bite my tongue. Yes it’s very hard for them, yes home schooling, yes work or furlough. But they have their loving families and company. I am completely isolated. It is fucking horrible.

I have been single throughout pandemic and had some snide comments about seeing friends when things loosened. I am sick of the judgment. I have been being safe and have not had Covid. Same coupled up friends have also been ignoring restrictions to suit them. I hate this competitive virtue signalling and I hate this horrible isolation.

I do not know how much longer I can do this for with no end in sight. There is nothing for me at the end of the pandemic either

im on my own as well... its tough eh...

thank fuck i have a dog - it would have been impossible without him.

Online dating?

Could be worse could be stuck in the house with somoneyou hate

Do you/can you not have a support bubble?

I escaped a bad relationship pre pandemic so counting my blessings

It is horrible and I am losing the will

Anne: I live in HMO student accomm but do not see the other residents

The regs have been a shitshow for those in such living situations

I agree with you. We’re all sailing the seas of this pandemic together - but we are not on the same boat and passage is more difficult for some than others. You could be on a luxury liner with no financial difficulties and lots of loved ones around you, or you could be in an inflatable canoe with a puncture, nobody around for miles and paddling furiously to keep afloat. Or a rocky fishing boat that’s doing okay for now but the next wave may capsize you (job instability, money issues).

I saw a comment that resonated with me: we're all in the same storm but not in the same boat; some people are in a massive, comfortable yacht whereas others are on a raft that's only just holding itself together.

X post!

When someone says this, I can't help but sing the line "we're all in this together!" from High School Musical in my head, and fight the urge to tell them to shut up.

The phrase should be banned .

@IDKNABYBIF22 Oh help. It’s nearly 1am and this is no time for that earworm! Thank you SO much! ;)

But yep, same storm, different boats. Your friends probably have good intentions when they say it to you, but sometimes it's better when people just acknowledge that the situation is shittier for some people atm. If they're making you feel bad for seeing people within the guidelines when they aren't following them themselves, then fuck em, hypocrites.

Hopeful that there is finally an end point in sight to this though. Trying to treat this winter as a hibernation period, but I don't live alone and know that I would really struggle if I did. Hope you are okay OP.

@Emmelina

You're welcome .

I’m sorry you are finding it so hard. I agree it is much harder for single people than for amicable couples or families. I hope things look up for you soon.

I completely agree with the same storm, different boats. My life has imploded the last year and worse to come yet and I don't live alone but am extremely lonely with nobody to talk to

YANBU. I’m single and lived alone for the majority of it before I decided to go and stay with my parents, I have a dog but I was in a London flat with no garden and wanted some more space for me and pooch - and company. I’ve seen friends who live with a partner I know they’re very happy with posting about how devastated they are about not being able to see family - I find it hard to muster sympathy when they’ve had a loving companion all through this, but I don’t express my feelings publicly because I don’t want to sound bitter and I recognise the wider situation is shit for everyone. The degree of shit varies between individuals though.

I have voted YABU because you seem to be saying that couples are breaking rules, single people aren't, but couples are being hypocritical and judging single people for wanting to break rules. This isn't my experience, I have found no difference between couples and single people in terms of rule breaking.

I am very sympathetic for people living alone. But as you say, it is a shithow for lots of people - I don't think you can entirely generalise. There will be people STILL stuck in broken and even kabusive relationships finding it even harder to escape now their finances are shattered by covid-economic impact. I have as much sympathy for those people.

I am really sorry you are having a tough time, and you are of course right some people are getting off quite lightly. But that is always how life is, some people have more luck than others .