DH driving me batsh@t

[Borisisafecklesstoad]

preparing to be told that I am being unreasonable but here goes. DH is a very prolific cleaner. We tend to share the house responsibilities and he tends to focus on cleaning and I do admin/cooking etc so we are fairly well balanced.

With the washing though, he is so fecking careless. He has managed to shrink 3 wool jumpers and a pair of gloves (dont even know why in gods name he would put gloves in the wash) in the last month. it just drives me nuts that he cannot take care when he puts a load in. I guess at times I do think that the detail of life with kids is left to me and so perhaps I am being a bit oversensitive. I know being all stuck together isn't easy so maybe its that boiling up, but it really is ripping my knitting...

YABU- Be happy he's doing a wash
YANBU- He could take a bit more care

I dont think you're being unreasonable, he is being careless and ruining your belongings.

Just don’t let him do the washes in future - as long as you feel he’s pulling his weight enough elsewhere and it’s not just him doing a crap job to get out of it.

My dp is shit at washing so I do it but he does all the other jobs I’m shit at.

YANBU. If he wants do it it that's great.. but he needs to do it properly!

In our house DH does almost all the laundry. But I have my own laundry basket in my bathroom where I put anything he might damage and I do one wash a week of delicate items. The is was after several shrunken woolies!

Keep thus man away from the machine!!

I have raged about stuff being washed badly (I knit and sew, so some things that get ruined represent hours of work.) We have 3 separate laundry baskets now: darks, lights and delicates. DH knows he is not to touch the delicates one.

you definitely need a separate laundry basket for delicates that he is not allowed to touch.

I was fuming when my dh shrank my favourite blouse and changed it for pink to grey. He no longer does the washing, it’s not his forte.

You definitely need to wash gloves relatively regularly.

I'm always shrinking stuff too, i annoy myself

Batshatt?

Nope.

Thanks ladies.
I'm maybe feeling a little sensitive with home school and everything else that's going on. I think I've turned it into a bigger respect issue than perhaps it is. I'll have a look at separate laundry bins and stick to loading the washing machine myself for a bit

My husband made himself an excel sheet for washing loads and how to do it and refers to it every time he does the washing

In our house I'm the one who shrinks DHs wools. I've always felt really bad and apologised. He's been nice about it but I just leave them now!

He is being annoying and careless.

But I wouldn’t want to discourage him from doing laundry. May I suggest that you get multiple well labelled laundry bags or boxes (I use Ikea Sortera recycling bins) and label them as dark 40, light 60, delicates etc.

Works for me and DH. Now if I can just get him to learn to hang the laundry up the way I like....

People with wool jumpers should be told to not put them in the general washing. It's just an error, presumably he will realise now not to put these items in the wash?

He has to be capable of learning this, right? I assume he can drive a car, dress himself, operate simple machinery e.g. a kettle or a blender without burning or chopping his fingers... so why can't he learn this? It is really simple. Don't put wool on hot wash / dry cycles.

I don't expect or want my DP to touch my laundry, but in return I never touch his. If he shrinks his own stuff, no impact on me - could that approach work for you?

What did he say when you spoke to him about it? Apologetic? Not caring?

@1stMrsF

In our house DH does almost all the laundry. But I have my own laundry basket in my bathroom where I put anything he might damage and I do one wash a week of delicate items. The is was after several shrunken woolies!

This...used to do same thing Now I’m retired and kids left home we have seperate baskets and do our own

@GhostPenguin

In our house I'm the one who shrinks DHs wools. I've always felt really bad and apologised. He's been nice about it but I just leave them now!

Ok, I once dyed my DHs sports shorts (cotton old fashioned type) pink becuase I shoved his red rugby top in with them. He never let me do his laundry after🤣