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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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To ask if Anxiety is an acceptable excuse for not wearing a mask?

827 replies

balihai550 · 12/01/2021 21:19

Just this...I had a mild panic attack in M&S today because for some reason masks make me feel closed in and like I can't breathe.

So I took it off and then had to explain to three people why I couldn't wear it. Anxiety in their view wasn't a good enough reason.

I often try to get online shops but atm all the ocado, Sainsbury's and Waitrose slots in my area are gone, so have to venture out.

Is not wearing a mask because of Anxiety and panic attacks unreasonable?

OP posts:
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covidaintacrime · 13/01/2021 10:40

covidaintacrime is just nitpicking posts

Not a lot to nitpick when things are blatantly offensive in many cases (as shown by the amount of deleted posts!).

JustNotFunAnymore · 13/01/2021 10:41

@balihai550

Just this...I had a mild panic attack in M&S today because for some reason masks make me feel closed in and like I can't breathe.

So I took it off and then had to explain to three people why I couldn't wear it. Anxiety in their view wasn't a good enough reason.

I often try to get online shops but atm all the ocado, Sainsbury's and Waitrose slots in my area are gone, so have to venture out.

Is not wearing a mask because of Anxiety and panic attacks unreasonable?

I felt like this at the beginning and now wear a mask for 8 hours a day at work. It's not nice, it's awful and I hate it but most of the time I forget it's on. I know of several people at work who, when masks were first part of the rules, couldn't wear one for anxiety reasons. They all wear masks or visors now.
MariaAngustias · 13/01/2021 10:43

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J101112 · 13/01/2021 10:46

It depends. Most people with anxiety can probably a mask. I suffer from anxiety and ocd and manage fine. But I know others cannot. Anxiety itself isn’t an excuse but it’s the accompanying symptoms with it!

Wife2b · 13/01/2021 10:49

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gottakeeponmovin · 13/01/2021 10:53

Whilst I sympathise with this I do not think any exemptions should be given. If you cannot wear a mask you should not enter a shop and put others at risk.. There is online shopping, click and collect or you can get someone else to do your shopping. I am sorry if this sounds harsh but it is literally a matter of life and death.

This in spades

ArseInTheCoOpWindow · 13/01/2021 10:53

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Poppynit · 13/01/2021 10:55

Some of the replies on this thread are awful. OP, as somebody who suffers from anxiety and panic disorder, I understand. I have to wear a mask all day at work and at first it was really difficult and I had a few panic attacks but now I’m so used to it I forget I’m wearing it to be honest. Here are a few things I found helpful;

I practised my anxiety breathing exercises at home while wearing a mask

Taking regular sips of water. This allowed me to have a little 10 second breather from the mask to calm down

Steam inhalation with Olbas oil a few times a week. Helps to open the airways and reduce the ‘stuffiness’ you may feel while breathing in the mask. Similarly, chewing gum while wearing the mask helped too

Try different types of mask. I find the surgical ones easiest to breathe in. I have to wear these at work anyway but I wore a fabric mask while I did my grocery shopping once and ended up having a panic attack outside Tesco in the rain 😂

Planning. Always go to the shop with a list and a plan of action. For example, in my local Tesco if I needed apples, pasta, and milk I would get the milk first as it’s the first thing you come across when you walk in, then the pasta as that’s in the next aisle and then the apples. That way you avoid faffing around the supermarket which adds to the stress and anxiety.

Also, rationalising helped a lot as well. My hypothetical worry of wearing a mask was that I wouldn’t be able to breathe and would have a panic attack. So I talked myself through what I would do if that were to happen. I would remove myself from the situation to calm down and try again.

Wearing a mask is important and does make a difference but if it is genuinely affecting you that much then you would be exempt. It’s just up to you whether you continue shopping without one which unfortunately, runs the risk of you being confronted or whether you explore different avenues (neighbours/friends/family shopping for you when they go shopping, click & collect/delivery etc).

Dinkydody · 13/01/2021 10:57

Pretending to be a doctor to get yourself self righteous point across has got to be the lowest I’ve seen on MN and that’s saying something 😡😡

wildraisins · 13/01/2021 10:59

Yes anxiety is an acceptable excuse and you don't have to explain it to anyone anyway. Just say you are exempt and it's no one's business why.

junecat · 13/01/2021 11:04

I guess it depends on the person to be honest. I have severe anxiety and PTSD but am fine with masks to be honest. I found the cloth ones far too hot which doesn't help but I am ok with paper ones.

I used to dread going shopping and would regularly have to leave due to panic attacks but am finding it so much easier now the restrictions are in place. Less crowded, less people at checkouts, people not invading my space etc. I haven't had to leave a store in month's now.

Honestly struggled with cloth ones though, the panic attack would have happened regardless of the mask but the heat made it so much harder to breathe x

Wontbemadetofeelrubbish · 13/01/2021 11:05

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Nonamesavail · 13/01/2021 11:05

I have ptsd and hate masks. However I can wear the thinner surgical ones. I cant wear the fabric ones. I just make sure I am in and out the shop quickly and at work I have a 5 min break every 45mins ro take mask off.

Heartlantern2 · 13/01/2021 11:05

If you can’t wear a mask due to anxiety or any other medical reason then you should be wearing a visor- this should be compulsory IMO

Wontbemadetofeelrubbish · 13/01/2021 11:06

@ArseInTheCoOpWindow not every anxiety sufferer suffer them same.

partyatthepalace · 13/01/2021 11:07

It’s not a good enough reason right now.

Try the paper disposable masks - much less constricting.

yahyahs22 · 13/01/2021 11:08

Of course it is. The guidelines specifically mention people like you. If someone feels unsafe around you they don't have to get near. Hope you're okay

Mcmole · 13/01/2021 11:09

I hate masks with a passion and haven't entered a shop since March for this reason, and won't do so until masks are no longer required, but am managing to find everything online. I've set up local fruit and veg deliveries (who have expanded their range to other foods), the milkman, supermarkets, baker, butcher, deliveroo, boots, amazon etc. Chances are you could cobble together enough stuff from a variety of suppliers.

I sympathise with the anxiety and panic attacks as tbh I find supermarkets stressful at the best of times (something to do with the aisles and lighting I think) and I know putting a mask on, and the associated fogged glasses, would just about make it impossible.

dontdisturbmenow · 13/01/2021 11:10

It depends. Most people with anxiety can probably a mask. I suffer from anxiety and ocd and manage fine. But I know others cannot. Anxiety itself isn’t an excuse but it’s the accompanying symptoms with it!
This. Someone who has been robbed from the back with the robber hand on their mouth is clearly likely to suffer intense anxiety putting a mask on.

But posters seem to have missed the fact that OP mentioned mild anxiety. Mild is not bad enough to justify taking it off and getting on as normal.

Bluesmartiesandpandapop · 13/01/2021 11:12

It says you don't have to wear one if it will cause you severe emotional stress, right? So panic attacks are a symptom of severe emotional stress, so I think you are exempt if you need to be.

FraggleShingleBellRock · 13/01/2021 11:16

I don't wear a mask. I was raped as a young tween and can't bare feeling breath on my face. Doesn't matter if it's my own, my babies , my dogs etc. It's intolerable because a man I trusted climbed into my bed and forced me against the wall while holding a hand over my face so he could penetrate me without me crying out. Breath, things touching my face, make me want to vomit and urinate from plain old fear and PTSD.

Thankfully I also have chronic sinusitis that means I can't wear a mask. The people that politely ask me to wear a mask get the sinus explanation. The corona police busy bodies that feel the need to loudly comment in the middle of a shop get the first explanation, rather loudly. Oddly enough, they don't like the attention it brings to them. Much like I don't like the attention they bring to me.

Op, feeling flushed sand panicky is horrid but hardly a good reason to not wear a mask. With more and more places now making them compulsory you need a work around. You can use a loose cotton scarf as a face covering and double up with a visor?

Bookworming · 13/01/2021 11:20

@Bluesmartiesandpandapop OP states she had a mild panic attack, she at no time states severe.

Severe is another question.

FrankskinnerscRoc · 13/01/2021 11:41

OP, try wearing a different mask. I feel OK wearing the tight black cheap type from Home Bargains, yet I don’t like the more expensive type at all. Anxiety is awful but it will pass.

LittlefairyMum · 13/01/2021 11:43

You can buy a plastic aid to go under your mask. It allows more space to breathe

NameChange84 · 13/01/2021 11:43

@AramintaLee

I suffer terribly from anxiety and also find the Mark suffocating. My breathing becomes very shallow and I get flustered and hot. However, I wear it to protect others. I know I can get through a shop with it on because I've done so many times and I will get through a shop many times going forward.

If it was so bad that I couldn't wear the mask, I would leave the shop and make other arrangements rather than put people at risk tbh.

This is me too, totally agree.