AIBU to request this appointment at the moment?

[CaptainVanesHair]

We’ve been trying for a baby since 2017. Had a loss in 2015, and two chemicals in 2019.

Recently brought the issue up with my therapist as was late and thought this is it til it wasn’t, and she thinks I need to go to see GP and get the ball rolling for help. Was going to do this last year but obviously things happened and took the view it wasn’t appropriate.

Her reasons for were valid, especially as I have a condition that can decrease fertility at 35 (which I turn this year) but I can’t get it out of my head that it would be a drain on resources needed elsewhere and gp will wonder what the hell I’m doing there.

Background in case it helps: 1 DD (10), know I’m ovulating, regular sex, obviously can get pregnant as evidenced by the losses. Follow ups weren’t great when they happened.

DH happy to support whatever I decide.

Can you email your surgery online? That's what I did about something I've been suffering from for years as I didn't want to bother them with covid going on. They called the next day and said they'd rather see me and I'm so glad as I've seen a little improvement already!

Surgery have removed that option otherwise that’s exactly what I would face done. Ringing seems so much more... insensitive but maybe I should. I feel caught between a rock and a hard place. Being late and getting my hopes up just a little bit was very emotional.

I feel for you but I don’t know that I’d do it just now.

I don’t know where you are in the world but where I am we’re bordering on catastrophe in terms of available beds and frontline workers to take care of people.

It’s not an environment I’d want to be in anyway tbh!

I’m in England so obviously it is incredibly stretched here. I’m also wary that therapist was coming at this from a mental health perspective while I’ve tried very hard to stay in the if it happens, it happens mindset.

Thank you for responding. It’s reassuring that my instincts aren’t totally off on this.

Do you know if your GP practice does their own blood tests? If so, then make an appointment. If not, don't bother - one of the first ports of call would be bloods and currently there is a ban on non-urgent blood tests performed at central 'hubs'.

Yes they do. I’m actually due some but surgery had no needles just before Christmas so currently booked in for feb. Maybe I could suggest getting blood for both at same time? At least then I know I’m not wasting needles!

I'd definite speak to the GP. I don't think it's selfish at all, after all life has to go on and if there is resources available to help you then they will

Another vote to move it forward and make contact with them. I don’t want to worry you but the wheels turn slowly in the NHS for this anyway. So l would start them in tortuously slow motion sooner rather than later.

If you get any comment s about why trying to conceive in a pandemic / don’t put pressure on the NHS / it’s not fair etc. Ignore! Super easy to say if you have never have fertility issues. We have been trying for over 2.5 years and we are having IVF imminently. Already we have waited too long

@CaptainVanesHair I would say that it’s way too easy for people to dismiss the want for a child.

Like I said, I’d be worried but I have all the dc I want so I can’t know what it’s like to long for it. Plus I have a sick dc who is high risk and I do think that skews my thinking a bit.

But this pandemic could go on into next year. There’s new strain after new strain. Hell, a brand new one could arrive in a few months and have us all at square one. So it’s probably not something you should let get in your way!