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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

For my 7 month old to watch TV or not?

28 replies

BeautyAndTheBump1 · 06/01/2021 16:29

So I put baby tv on for DS for the last few months - he loved it, i could get stuff done, great! Then he started whinging for it when it wasnt on and all he wanted to do was watch TV.
So I thought hold up, did some googling, read it was terrible, turned the TV off and made him go cold turkey. Yep. Cold turkey at (then) 6 months old.

Started working again this week, put the tv on for 10 mins whilst on a call, as soon as i turned it off he started whinging alllllll day again for it. So its like its either all or nothing?!

Just came up in a conversation with a friend, they told me I was being ridiculous and I was lucky that my baby was entertained enough to lay and watch TV. They would definitely not be turning it off if it kept their baby quiet, and as soon as he can crawl he will be no longer interested in the TV anyway.

AIBU keeping the TV off? Am i just being an over worrying FTM? Or am I actually speaking some sense? When he has the tv on he just lays there and does nothing, so im worried he would also fall behind on milestones.

Be kind Grin

OP posts:
Findahouse21 · 06/01/2021 16:31

I don't actively put the TV on for dd (12 months) and would actively stop her watching if she showed behaviour like your ds, sorry.

RedHelenB · 06/01/2021 16:31

Mine watched teletubbies at 6/7 months but they all were all early crawlers so would play and watch. Never cried when I switched it off though. Are you sure that's why they're whinging?

orangejuicer · 06/01/2021 16:32

YANBU to keep the tv off. I think the whinging is an issue. TV by itself isn't really but I would say try and limit it as much as you can as it can cause speech delay issues and is much harder to sort out at say 2 years old (which I'm now dealing with!)

sqirrelfriends · 06/01/2021 16:36

Honestly I think it's fine in moderation, I didn't do it because my MIL scared me about the dangers of tv but if I had my time again I would allow a bit of educational tv (not hours obviously) to give myself a break. It turns out a lot of my friends and colleagues use the tv a lot (on consistently during the day etc) which I don't really agree with but it does help me to feel a bit less guilt over what DS watches.

Cheesey21 · 06/01/2021 16:44

@BeautyAndTheBump1 I could have written your post but my LO is 8 months old. I don't put actual programmes on, nor is she interested in them but she loves little baby bum which is all nursery rhymes. I try and only put it on now when I need to get something done but she does also whinge for it which I hate. She never lays and watches it though, she's always crawling round playing with her toys and will look up every now and then. If I'm having a day when I really don't want her to watch it then I have to work extra hard to entertain her myself which is really difficult when we're in the midst of a sleep regression and lockdown 🙃 I do also have days when it's on in the background all day and feel awful. My saving grace is that if she's taking anything in from them then it's counting, shapes, colours etc 🤷🏻‍♀️ she's very happy though and developing rapidly!

Has1402 · 06/01/2021 16:46

I can’t cope without it at the moment in this lockdown. Mines 19 months and watches a few hours a day spaced out. There’s no where to go and I’ve decided not to feel guilty about it.

marshmallowfluffy · 06/01/2021 16:54

Have you tried music or radio and a light projector or something? You can get ones where the colours move around the room and liking music or light shows is probably better than tv although i wouldn't judge you for using it right now and weaning him off in the spring when he might be mobile and go out more.

Brieminewine · 06/01/2021 17:07

DD is 18M and we often have babytv on throughout the day and have done since she was about 6MO. She doesn’t really sit and watch it and doesn’t paddy if it’s not on but loves the nursery rhymes and songs.

It hasn’t affected her development (as far as I can tell) her speech is quite advanced for her age, she probably says around 60 words plus animal noises.

I think there’s a huge difference between some background tv for a child who’s constantly played with and read to and a child being plonked infront of a tv all day with an adult who doesn’t interact with them!

december212 · 06/01/2021 17:11

If you need the tv in order to entertain the little one while you work then that's what you need to do. Just make sure when you're not working, you play with them, get outside (if possible) and keep the tv to an absolute minimum.

Kanaloa · 06/01/2021 17:14

Are you playing with him or doing anything else? At 7 months he isn’t old enough to think ‘I’ll cry now cause I want the telly on.’ But if the telly is his only entertainment and other than that he’s just sitting he may be whinging from boredom.

Maybe you could set all his toys out and show him how to play or put a cd on to dance to or something so he isn’t bored.

namechangetheworld · 06/01/2021 17:25

@Cheesey21
My now 5 year old learnt her entire alphabet (as well as most of the times tables) from watching Little Baby Bum as a toddler. We often had it on in the background to sing along to. 2 year old is also often stuck in front of it so I can get homeschooling done with the eldest. No regrets. TV is fine in moderation, the same as everything else.

Cornetttttto · 06/01/2021 17:36

CBeebies is wonderful. As long as you aren't leaving them alone to watch TV for hours on end then crack on! As for the whining, ignore and give them something else eg a book, a toy. People get way too precious about TV on here.

Original poster
BeautyAndTheBump1 · 06/01/2021 17:48

@Cheesey21 its little baby bum that he watches too. He loves the nursery rhymes and the shapes train he literally grins from ear to ear when it comes on 😬

OP posts:
Original poster
BeautyAndTheBump1 · 06/01/2021 17:51

@Kanaloa yes of course, i'm constantly going from room to room to do different activities with him. My question is AIBU for keeping the tv off. Life would be a hell of alot easier if i put the tv on, i could get work done, but i dont want it to affect his development.

OP posts:
Cheesey21 · 06/01/2021 17:54

@namechangetheworld it's good to know it does actually teach things subconsciously 😄

@BeautyAndTheBump1 that's one of our favourites too as well as the ducks and those pesky kittens who are forever losing their mittens 😄 they need some string through their coats!

crosstalk · 06/01/2021 18:07

Radio?

Tigger001 · 06/01/2021 18:10

You are not being unreasonable to turn the tv off.

We never had the tv on around our son, we had music on but no TV.
Our son only really started having the to on when he was about 2 and that was at his Nanas.
You do what you think is best, your child, your choice

SnackSizeRaisin · 06/01/2021 18:34

Screen time for under 2s is detrimental. So obviously yanbu for keeping it off.
I also don't like the idea of using a screen as a babysitter for such a young baby. Surely they need to learn to entertain themselves, or that it's ok to be a bit bored, rather than relying on TV for emotional support.
Obviously it is sometimes necessary to rely on screens if wfh but in an ideal world I would only watch something with the baby and talk to them about it or sing along rather than just leaving them to it.
Also I am quite surprised a 7 mo would whinge all day about TV - that sounds more like a 3 year old! Maybe there is something else going on? Maybe try putting some music on instead?

Has1402 · 07/01/2021 18:45

@SnackSizeRaisin

Perfect parent alert. We’re in lockdown? If tv on for the kids keeps people sane then so be it.

UnbeatenMum · 07/01/2021 19:19

YANBU to keep it off. It will be detrimental to his development if he's watching it for hours and is that transfixed by it. My DS didn't really watch TV before 13-14 months and after that it was 15 minutes a day, no more than an hour before age 2.

CoronaIsADick · 07/01/2021 20:15

I have 20 month old twins and they do watch a fair bit TV tbh but it's mainly in the background as they do potter about and play still. If I feel like they are distracted by it too much I do turn it off. As far as delaying development etc. I really cant comment as my 2 seem perfectly fine. I actually think some of the numbers/letters and animal nursery rhymes have taught them things, my little boy in particular can count to 10, he can recognise loads of numbers and letters. They both know the names of numerous animals and noises they make, know all their body parts etc. Can both even say sorry and thank you in Makaton. So I don't think TV is all that bad aslong as it's not becoming too big of an addiction.
I do feel bad sometimes when I feel like they may have watched too much on a certain day, but I just keep thinking we are in the middle of a pandemic, there's been nothing for them to do, even more so now in the lockdown and being with them all day, as much as I love it and would never trade my place with anyone, it can be hard and tiring. So if I can get 15 minutes for me to have a coffee/do the dishes/washing etc. Then I'm taking it.

Peridotty · 07/01/2021 20:33

Hi! I also have a 7 month old! I’ve been strongly opposed to screens since she was born. I avoid having her looking at my phone or my laptop (except for FaceTime with grandparents which is unavoidable). I think it could have a detrimental impact on kids attention spans. When I need some time to do the dishes or something like that then I will put her in a jumperoo for ten mins (no more than 15 mins a day) or give to someone else to look after quickly. My baby’s crawling now so can’t be left alone on the floor but you could get a playpen for your baby so they have somewhere to play safely. My baby gets bored easily but she can play on her own for ten mins without whining.

Rosebel · 07/01/2021 20:39

My nearly 7 month old loves Teletubbies (thanks to my older daughter) and whinges if we turn it off but doesn't care if anything else is on.
Is it just certain programs that he whinges about? If he does it every time I'd ban TV for now.

SuperSleepyBaby · 07/01/2021 20:47

My 2 year old watched far more TV than recommended when she was younger as she would watch while her older brother and sister were watching TV.

She seems totally fine - and has a lot of vocabulary from TV!

YakkityYakYakYak · 07/01/2021 20:49

I’m not as militantly anti-screens as the rest of mumsnet seems to be, but do think it needs to be moderated so they’re getting a variety of activities.

I never really put anything on TV for DD when she was a baby but ended up (at 10 mo) having to sit her in front of Disney for a lot of the day during lockdown 1 as DH and I were both working full-time. After that she got a lot like your DC and would cry when it was turned off. So now we only really let her watch it for about max 1 hour a day and when I turn it off I just have something ready to distract her to deal with the tantrum.

Things are tough at the moment not being able to take them anywhere, sometimes you just need a break, I really don’t think mums need to be feeling guilty for a bit of screen time. It really won’t do any harm provided you’re balancing it with other more enriching activities.