Interesting thread. A few of the comments struck a chord.
I actually think that a lot of people feel the way you have expresssd, but why are we always waiting for other people to make the first move?
“Barely had so much as a phone call”
“I know this is the time you would hope friends would reach out to you just to check you are okay.”
“They’re just not picking me!”
I felt a bit like all of the above at times over the last year but I decided hang on, why don’t I phone other people, why don’t I reach out and why shouldn’t I be the one doing the picking?
“I have been asking people for walks” exactly!!
No one was contacting me, or that's how it felt. But then two things happened - I started to really focus on any time when someone else DID contact me "first" - I felt that deserved acknowledgment and reciprocation, and I shouldn’t take it for granted - and I also just thought "blow it! I'll do a sort of campaign of contacting every friend or associate that I'd like to be in contact with, ask them how they are, suggest a walk or a zoom call".Most people at the very least responded and they seemed pleased to hear from me. I then made definite plans with them, rather than airyfairy "let's do a walk sometimes" that never come to fruition. It sounds silly but I now have a regular panel of people to walk with or chat to regularly, although the most recent lockdown has thrown some spanner's in the works due to some distances Once the momentum picked up, I almost couldn’t fit everyone in!!
I think you've got to see it, friendship, as a sort of project. I didn't feel needy reaching out in this way. As I did a blanket approach, if people didn’t take me up on it, that was fine, I had plenty of other contacts coming back to me and felt no ill will or bother. I just accepted they had their own reasons for not reciprocating at this time and probably nothing personal to me.
Good luck!