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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Couples in twin beds?

98 replies

Sandalison · 28/12/2020 14:10

I just watched an episode of Fawlty Towers where Basil and Sybil are in twin beds. Is that part of the comedy that they’re a weird couple, or was this quite usual in the 60s? Do some couples sleep like this now?
Have to say, it appeals to me, I like my own space!

OP posts:
HmmSureJan · 28/12/2020 16:10

In Germany two single mattresses in their own slots on a very large base used to be common. Separate quilts and bedding etc. I always thought it to be the ideal arrangement tbh.

HmmSureJan · 28/12/2020 16:13

Like this.

Couples in twin beds?
TheHumanSatsuma · 28/12/2020 16:17

@Reedwarbler

Sod twin beds - separate bedrooms and bathrooms for me.
Most definitely!
EveryDayIsADuvetDay · 28/12/2020 16:22

I used to know a couple that each had a semi detached house, with the back gardens joined.
Seemed a perfect arrangement.

Havanananana · 28/12/2020 16:27

In Germany two single mattresses in their own slots on a very large base used to be common

This is still the norm in much of Europe (north of the Alps, at least). The great advantage is that each partner can have exactly the duvet weight and mattress firmness that they want - and they can roll over, toss and turn without disturbing the other person.

RoganJosh · 28/12/2020 16:28

One of my sets of grandparents had twin beds. The very ‘proper’ couple. The other had a double.

ProfessionalWeirdo · 28/12/2020 16:31

@Thecazelets

Films of the 30s and 40s generally depict couples in twin beds - I think this was due to the censorship laws of the time.
^^ This. And on the rare occasions when a couple did share a double bed, there was a rule that one or both of them must have at least one foot on the floor at all times.

In fact, the first couple to appear on TV sharing a double bed were Fred & Wilma Flintstone! Smile

ThePricklySheep · 28/12/2020 16:47

@Thecazelets

Films of the 30s and 40s generally depict couples in twin beds - I think this was due to the censorship laws of the time.
Oh @Thecazelets I have just noticed your username. I am currently working my way through as a post covid convalescence.
Couples in twin beds?
VettiyaIruken · 28/12/2020 16:48

I've got my own bedroom. It's bloody fantastic!

Hirewiredays · 28/12/2020 17:00

We are just about to get matching twin beds and I can't bloody wait. I hate sharing a bed. Hate it. Being woken up and in my space. I sleep so much better on my own. I find it such a strange concept to go from sleeping alone all thought out your life then having to share once you're in a relationship.

Remxhah126 · 28/12/2020 17:02

In Germany two single mattresses in their own slots on a very large base used to be common

That's what we have! I like being close to OH but I also like my on duvet that no one can steal and a softer mattress than OH who likes sleeping on something akin to a rock.

My grandparents always had twin beds. Apparently it was because my grandmother was 5' tall and very slightly built and my grandfather was a 6'2" tall ex rugby prop. They tried a double bed just after they were married and every time he rolled over she was dragged along by gravity.

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 28/12/2020 17:02

We've got a super king base with 2 single mattresses on

That's either one enormous cigarette packet or two teeny-weeny little mattresses Grin

Makes very good sense to me. If you think about all of the different kinds of mattresses there are out there to suit individual preferences, what are the actual chances of two people sharing the exact favourite texture, firmness, thickness, spring-count etc. - and also happening to be married to each other?!

littlepattilou · 28/12/2020 17:18

@VettiyaIruken

I've got my own bedroom. It's bloody fantastic!
Oh hell yeah. Grin

Once you have your own bedroom, you will NEVER go back. Grin

It's absolute Heaven. Halo

littlepattilou · 28/12/2020 17:19

DH loves having his own bedroom too. We both love it. Smile

SwedishK · 28/12/2020 17:19

My grandparents had separate beds and once they were older they built a wall between the beds et voila, separate bedrooms. Sounds like a dream to me.

winterbabythistime · 28/12/2020 17:23

My grandparents (born in the 20s) had twin beds for most of their marriage (as far as I know). They adored each other, really affectionate towards each other until they died within 6 months of each other in their 90s.

littlepattilou · 28/12/2020 17:35

@winterbabythistime

My grandparents (born in the 20s) had twin beds for most of their marriage (as far as I know). They adored each other, really affectionate towards each other until they died within 6 months of each other in their 90s.
Awwwww. Grin

It's weird actually, how some people assume if a couple has separate beds or separate bedrooms that they're not close, not intimate, and there are very likely problems in the marriage. They can't comprehend how a married couple can possibly sleep apart. Wink

Yet, all the couples I have ever known who have long marriages (30+ years) have slept separately for the last 15-20 years or more. Most of them slept together for the first 10 years or so, as they thought it was romantic and so lovely to snuggle with hubby. Grin

That novelty wears off quickly, when he starts snoring... Confused And when an extra bedroom pops up (if a child leaves home, or you get a bigger house,) many women move into another bedroom. (And as I said, once you have your own bedroom, you will never go back!)

Also, some couples I have known over the last 20-30 years, who have always shared a bed, have split up.

So sleeping apart means naff-all. Indeed, I strongly believe that sleeping separately (ergo getting a good sleep, and having your own private space/more me-time in your own room) actually strengthens a marriage.

Just my opinion of course. Smile

StartingGrid · 28/12/2020 17:40

Another for for seperate rooms (well, floors in our case!) - I couldn't think of anything worse than having him thrashing around keeping me awake. The cats pick and choose as they please, everyone's happy!

rosegoldwatcher · 28/12/2020 18:00

Fawlty Towers was set in the 70s, not the 60s. (Series 1 and 2 made in 1975 and 1979.)

misses the point of the thread

80sMum · 28/12/2020 18:05

Never mind separate beds, separate rooms is the way to go! DH and I have had separate bedrooms since the youngest DC left home. I wholeheartedly recommend it!

SillyUnMurphy · 28/12/2020 18:07

My parents sleep in twin beds. They have done since my mum went through a really bad menopause about 30 years ago. She couldn’t bear being near anyone, she suffered with hot flushes so badly. They’ve been married 45 years

Jenjenn · 28/12/2020 18:18

We have the german setup. Once dc leaves, I am having my own room with my own double bed.

Bookworming · 28/12/2020 18:38

I don't understand how anyone can possibly sleep in the same bed, indefinitely, long-term, with another person. It's untenable. You simply cannot get proper sleep.

Been married 32 years and not found it untenable or that I can't get proper sleep!

Johan23 · 28/12/2020 18:42

If you have enough space I think separate bedrooms are the way to go!

PlLs sleep in separate rooms. Only discovered last new year when we slept over. I woke up and DS had peed the bed we were sharing. DH wasn’t there so I thought he was in the spare room. Went and woke him up to discover it was FIL!

And they are the most in love couple I know (married nearly 50 years)

MrsHugsxx · 28/12/2020 19:33

I hate the idea of separate beds. I don't sleep properly when my husband isn't next to me. I like to put my feet up on him to keep them warm too.