How do I stop DH taking me for granted?

[Hustssleeping]

He's a good dad. He does at least 50% of childcare to 2DDs 1year and 5 years. He does more than his fair share of tidying and washing etc. I appreciate what he does though I dont go on about it.

He doesn't appreciate what I do. He doesn't ever put my feelings first. I'm dammed if I I do and damned if I don't. He doesn't like being wrong. He is slightly better at apologising than when I met him. So will maybe one in 10 times I think he should, or i would.
On a good day we have so much fun with the kids

But he doesn't want to listen to my opinion. He says he wants to be a team but doesn't want to discuss things. He expects me to read his mind.
If it wasn't for the kids I would have left. For a time out if nothing else. Now this year of course that's not possible but also I would never leave the kids. He would be fine without me for a while but maybe he would appreciate having me around if I wasn't around. Because I can't get him to appreciate having me around while I am.

I feel like he's forgotten I'm a person. That I could leave. Though I wouldn't

Hey OP, I didn't want to 'read and run'. I'm sorry you're going through a difficult time with your partner.

Is it possible to talk with him about what you feel "being a team" really means? And explain how you feel unappreciated and give some examples to paint a picture of how you're feeling? If you can, I would definitely say to have that conversation, because sometimes a good talk can do the world of good. But I understand that given the nature of your post (him not caring what your opinion is), it might be futile. I hope things can improve for you soon.

He is slightly better at apologising than when I met him.

So - you knew what he was like.

He'll never change. He'll never not take you for granted because - why would he? You married and had kids with him anyway.

@Bunchup

He is slightly better at apologising than when I met him.

So - you knew what he was like.

He'll never change. He'll never not take you for granted because - why would he? You married and had kids with him anyway.

A little harsh. Maybe the problem is something that has become noticeable or more visible as time has passed by and OP has had a chance to reflect more? And now, upon reflection, OP realises how he's not moved much towards being more empathetic etc.

Yeah - exactly what I said

Can you give us some examples of his behaviour? He doesn’t sound very nice.

If you’re not happy you need to leave. (Easier said than done I know but it has to be said).

@Bunchup

He is slightly better at apologising than when I met him.

So - you knew what he was like.

He'll never change. He'll never not take you for granted because - why would he? You married and had kids with him anyway.

Agreed. People don’t change, they become more of who they are.

How depressing is it to live your life feeling your incapable of change?