I was on a Christmas Eve video call with my family back home earlier and I ended up just hanging up because there was literally no point in me being there, nobody even acknowledged my presence, or that of my small children. When my sibling is around, nobody is ever interested in me or my family. It’s always been the way.
When my mum was dying, I gave up my job and my home and moved away from my husband to care for her in the country where she lived. In her last days, when it was obvious that she didn’t have much longer, my sibling decided to go on holiday instead of visiting her. At the funeral, however, our relatives acted like there was a celebrity in the room when my sibling (who looks down their nose at them and has barely had any contact with them since childhood) arrived. I was the one who had spent months of my life in and out of hospitals, cleaning up piss and vomit and blood, driving family members all over the place, but all anybody could talk about was how attractive, how rich, how “successful” my sibling was. (In truth, my parents paid their rent through university and bought the the big house in which they now live whereas I was sort of left to my own devices). It didn’t bother me much at the time because I just wanted to be left alone anyway but looking back I’m astounded at how shallow people seem to be.
On the video call our relatives mentioned the cards and presents they had sent my sibling and their child. Nothing for me or my children.
I really don’t understand why this is the case. I make such an effort with my family and never forget birthdays or anniversaries, always ask how they are, try to show an interest in their lives. My sibling literally does nothing.
Does anybody else have the same in their family?
(I realize this is such a small concern in comparison to the other problems in the world right now but it’s getting me down and I don’t really have anybody to talk to about it).