To wonder why we always call doctors by their last name

[Loveandpeace56]

In any other profession this wouldn’t be the case. Even teachers do often refer to themselves by their first names but with a doctor this would never happen.

To answer OP: Because we don't know them socially (or most of us don't), only professionally.
I started my working life in John Lewis Oxford Street - the department firm rule was to never call another member of staff by their first name ON THE SHOP FLOOR or the customers would start doing it although they did not know any of us at all. After that, I became a medical secretary and have been for 43 years now. In conversation with patients I never refer to the consultant by his first name as that immediately changes the relationship between consultant and patient and the patients nearly always become over familiar and start asking me about consultants' family life, etc, where he/she lives/goes on holidays etc (which, obviously, I do not tell them). It crosses a barrier that works well in doctor/patient relationships and damages that relationship, in my opinion. I would, equally, never call a patient by their first name unless they had already spoken to me on the 'phone and introduced themselves by it, so clearly their preferred way of being addressed by me. In recent years we have had many younger patients, who are coming as new patients and who have never met the consultant. referring to them only by their first name in conversation with me whilst arranging their consultations - I just find that REALLY RUDE. Very long-term patients with difficult conditions do often eventually end up being on first name terms with their specialist but that is a different thing - they have both been through a lot of battles together. I've been a patient a lot in the last 10 years (as I've got older) and I would never call any doctor treating me by their first name (unless I knew them because I had worked for them for years already).

I have never called a Doctor anything much. In hospital, they introduce themselves by their first names as policy. It was an initiative introduced a while ago. All HCPs say "hi, I'm [first name]" when they interact with patients in hospital.

There’s good evidence that doctors encouraging their colleagues to call them by their first name reduces the chance of complications due to human error.

I’m a consultant surgeon, I introduce myself to patients as Sue Smith, consultant surgeon. Most then call me Dr/Miss Smith, some call me Sue, some call me doc or doctor. Don’t mind any of them.

I don’t like colleagues calling me anything but my first name, particularly in theatre. We are a single team, everyone is as important a part of that team as the next. If I’m about to fuck up, it makes it far easier for someone to speak up!

"I have to keep reminding my DDs to tell me which teacher they're talking about as I don't know one Sir from the next "

Sir is how male teachers are addressed, now how they're referred to in conversation. I'm sure your DDs would be able to say Mr/Ms X if they were talking about them to another teacher.

it’s a huge red flag for me that this patient believes they know the whole of the discipline of medicine with a quick google better than I do (forget the medical degree and decades of post-grad experience and training) and is trying to alter the power dynamics in the consultation and tell me what to think/do/prescribe.

You're the one with the experience of the doctor/patient relationship, but this seems a large leap to me. I do also speak as a fellow female professional with a 'Dr' title, so completely see where you're coming from with needing to use that title and maintain particular boundaries whereas a man in the same situation would not. But the poster @RosesAndHellebores makes very good points about the subordinate relationship insisted upon when a doctor requires formal address but does not extend the same courtesy in return. (And I'm one who does prefer being addressed by my first name as a rule).

What does surprise me is that you assume so much from a patient's mode of address: more so, that you are assuming a power position in your consultations. That's concerning. Of course I'm not suggesting you should go against your professional expertise in indulging a patient's inexpert whim. But this is in fact about that patient's own body. They are consulting you in that capacity for your medical expertise, not throwing themselves upon your mercy as an authority figure.

Whatever the underlying intention, mutual respect is key here. I don't think anyone goes out of their way to offend others by their style of address but it should also be borne in mind that certain sensitivities exist in terms of inequality between the sexes in particular. Anyone insisting I call them Dr can extend that courtesy to me also. 'Ms' I'd also accept: Miss or Mrs (which my title keeps reverting to on their system), no. And I would correct that, every time.

"Because we don't know them socially (or most of us don't),"

Loads of people knew their GPs socially when I was growing up. Thinking about it now, I wonder if it's become something to be avoided these days, but that would make life very difficult in smaller communities.

"it’s a huge red flag for me that this patient believes they know the whole of the discipline of medicine with a quick google better than I do (forget the medical degree and decades of post-grad experience and training) and is trying to alter the power dynamics in the consultation and tell me what to think/do/prescribe."

Doctors who look down on their patients like this are a huge red flag to me.
Doctors don't know everything, especially about rare illnesses and ones that discourage patients from doing internet research in a country where access to doctors is so difficult are really awful.
This paragraph doesn't go with the rest of what you write Mariel, was it a quote?

Change the ludicrous outdated travesty of a woman's title depending on her marital status, and you'll see the difference shrink enormously.

Agree completely. I'd go one further and say I don't see why titles are necessary to identify a person at all.

I'm friends with my doctor - my wife works at the local village GP surgery and our kids are the same ages went to school together etc.

Talking to her outside work hours I use her first name. If I go to see her as a patient I call her by her doctor name. Same with her male colleague who I know less well socially but sometime see professionally. It just feels right somehow. Separates the professional from the personal so we can look in each other in the face at a meal after she's had her rubber-gloved finger up my bum earlier in the day. Different persona.

"Agree completely. I'd go one further and say I don't see why titles are necessary to identify a person at all."

For the reason explained by Roses above that some people don't want to be addressed by their first name in some cases.

This paragraph doesn't go with the rest of what you write Mariel, was it a quote?

Sorry @Gwenhwyfar yes, I was replying to the first paragraph and had a bold fail!

Sorry, not Roses, MrsJoyful.

Loads of people knew their GPs socially when I was growing up.

We had the same family doctor for my first 12 years of life until he retired and then I had the same one after that for another 18 years. We definitely did not know them socially though - i.e. never went to their homes, nor they to ours (except for professional reasons) or otherwise socialise with them.

Unless I am invited to use a first name I never would do this automatically, so it is always Mr/Ms/Miss/Mrs/Dr. etc

I do expecet the same in return. I would say something if a person I use in a professional way would automatically use my first name.

The only professions where I know a first name is used automatically is my hairdresser and hospitality staff.

I used to call my consultant John because that was his name, I ain’t about to start calling anyone Mr especially when I’m older than him. The new consultant introduced himself by his christian name.

All the obstetric and fetal medicine doctors I have been under this year with my stillborn son introduced themselves by their first names. I guess it depends on the doctor.

Well

A) it's a prefix
B) it's their name
C) it's respectful to recognise their title as they worked hard for it
D) that's what they want to be called.

I'm friends with one of my children's teachers but on school grounds I call her Mrs X as she is in her professional setting at the time and my child's teacher not as my friend at that moment

Somewhat a tangent, but I think I would like to be formally addressed and labelled as a 'customer', getting rid of the word 'patient'. I would also like to be under one of the many superior systems of national health service, which all appear to involve some payment, even if it is modest, even if it is under a health insurance scheme, even if it is repaid to the customer.
This is because of the British phrase "beggars can't be choosers", which rapidly converts to encouragement of the widespread contempt (especially of women) within the medical profession (see recent Baroness Cumberledge report)

Well you could more to a country with such a superior system I guess
Or just keep on voting Tory until all your dreams come true.

And you have the option of paying for private care right now.
No one need ever interact with the NHS if they don't want to and make paying for private healthcare as much a priority as the private school fees

I overheard one of my young anaesthetists introduce herself to a nervous old man in the anaesthetic room as “Hi I’m Sally, I’m one of the team”, before putting him to sleep for major surgery. I grabbed her afterwards and gave her an imaginary situation, to try and get her to see it from the patient’s viewpoint.
I told her to pretend she was an elderly airline passenger, going on her first ever flight, waiting anxiously for take off. The pilot comes on the intercom for a preflight announcement. Which one, I asked, would reassure her she was in safe hands:
A) “Good morning, this is Captain Bloggs, your pilot, speaking. Welcome aboard flight 306 to Malaga.” Or
B) “Hi, I’m Sally, one of the team, and I’m gonna fly you to Malaga!”
She immediately “got it” - when a patient or passenger is putting their life in your hands, they need to know you are a trustworthy professional, not their mate off Facebook!
I further explained that she looks about 15 to the average elderly patient, many of whom would assume she was a nurse, and she therefore needs all the gravitas she can muster. Her professional title is part of that.
Also, to maintain detachment and avoid embarrassment, patients should always be addressed as title, surname, especially when expecting them to undress or permit you to carry out intimate examinations and procedures. If they prefer their first name, they can tell me, but it is always best to start with polite formality and respect.

Customer?

No, not a word I like in this context. I go in a shop and buy something - I am a customer. I see my GP - I am her patient. She looks after me medically. I am not purchasing from her.

Babdoc. A person after my own heart. Exactly the way I see things and the way I practice and teach others.

No way will I ever refer to any patient as a customer either. It's not the local garage or the corner shop.

We've had to put up with client and bloody 'service user' in mental health for years. Until it was realised that in fact most patients preferred patient.

DonkeyMcFluff
It gives people confidence in authority. Lots of teachers have PhDs but don’t call themselves Dr because the public doesn’t need to trust them.

And because if they let it get out that they have a doctorate, people ring them up in the small hours wanting medical advice.