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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Can I take my husband and baby to emergency outpatient appointment?

55 replies

Gardeniaofdelights · 21/12/2020 20:03

Sorry, posting mainly for traffic!

I have been given an emergency outpatient appointment in hospital tonight due to absolutely debilitating pain caused by gallstones. Can I bring my husband and 3 week old baby? My baby is exclusively breastfed and won’t take a bottle, so he needs to be with me for feeding. When the attacks happen the pain is so vicious I can’t really safely be in charge of my baby at the same time, hence wanting my husband there too.

Will I be allowed to bring them with me? Hopefully the appointment will be short and they can just wait in the car but if there’s any time waiting around (I know how these things can go) the baby will almost certainly need fed. I just don’t know whether with Covid they will have provision for this kind of thing.

OP posts:
Bluetonic41 · 21/12/2020 20:05

Waiting in the car is fine, they won't be allowed into the out patient clinic setting

Original poster
Gardeniaofdelights · 21/12/2020 20:08

That’s what I’m worried about Sad if I end up having to spend any length of time in the clinic and he needs fed, I’m not sure what he will do. Maybe my husband can text me and I can nip out to feed him in the car? He’s going through a bit of a growth spurt at the moment so he is feeding very frequently.

OP posts:
Bluetonic41 · 21/12/2020 20:10

You will have to do that, just explain to the clinic coordinator if you have to leave, they should be able to slot you in when you return. They won't let you take your husband and baby in with you so you don't really have much choice.

moita · 21/12/2020 20:10

Might be worth trying the bottle. My babies wouldn't feed if I was there but would if I was away from them and had no choice. Good luck.

Norah8 · 21/12/2020 20:11

Explain to them I am sure it will be fine. I work in outpatients

Camomila · 21/12/2020 20:11

They'll have to wait outside I think,
I had to go to A&E in the April lockdown, DH took then 4m old DS2 with him and they waited outside - he called me when he needed a feed and I went outside and fed him on the wall.

Smallbus1 · 21/12/2020 20:11

I’m sure they might actually make an exception for an ebf baby, even if you have to go out to feed. Explain as soon as your arrive.

Camomila · 21/12/2020 20:12

(I explained to the nurse at the door I was going out and then wad let back in again)

Camomila · 21/12/2020 20:13

*was

Bluetonic41 · 21/12/2020 20:21

I work in an emergency setting, in our trust they would be fine to wait outside but not sit in with you.

Higgeldypiggeldy35 · 21/12/2020 20:37

Have you tried expressing? Maybe baby could take a bottle in an emergency? Otherwise surely they must make an exception in the circumstances?

PeanuttyButter · 21/12/2020 20:38

If you need a cholecystectomy what will happen then? Can you not try expressing in the meantime and see if baby will take a bottle while there is still the option of breast if needed? Good luck OP x

Brieminewine · 21/12/2020 20:40

At our place baby would be allowed, but not ideal, husband wouldn’t be allowed in. No visitors unless they’re the patients carers currently due to C19.

lambo88 · 21/12/2020 20:40

Hi had to have my gallbladder removed due to gallstones after pregnancy but my little boy was 6 months and was bottle fed...just explain ur situation Hun...if u have to have keyhole surgery the recovery wasn't to bad at all xx

Brieminewine · 21/12/2020 20:42

As a side note, have your tried buscopan? Patients with biliary colic find it much better than opioids like codeine.

PleasantVille · 21/12/2020 20:42

You'd be best to check with the hospital to get their rules, don't assume they all have the same ones.

june2007 · 21/12/2020 20:44

I expect your Bf baby would be allowed, partner not so.

DimidDavilby · 21/12/2020 20:47

Your baby will definitely be allowed. It would be illegal to try to separate you as a bf mum.

Covidrelapse · 21/12/2020 20:47

Baby would be allowed but partner not. Feed baby just before you go in then keep your phone on. They most likely won’t keep you hanging around with Covid

EdwardCullensBiteOnTheSide · 21/12/2020 20:53

You poor thing! I would personally feed baby then send dp for a drive for as long as you're in your appointment. Hopefully baby will sleep. Hope all goes well op Flowers

Original poster
Gardeniaofdelights · 21/12/2020 20:54

Thank you everyone Flowers I’ll have them both wait in the car and get husband to text or call if he needs fed.

If I do need my gallbladder out I will express in advance and hopefully we can persuade the baby to take a bottle when there is no other option!

Thanks so much for your responses.

OP posts:
OverTheRainbow88 · 21/12/2020 20:55

I would take baby in a pram with you so if you’re in pain can put baby in . Such a shit situation, hope you’re ok

SleepingStandingUp · 21/12/2020 21:01

@OverTheRainbow88

I would take baby in a pram with you so if you’re in pain can put baby in . Such a shit situation, hope you’re ok
This. If baby starts crying for a feed whilst you're being seen he's going to be past the bar by the time you can get to him. Leave DH in car and take baby with you and only take him out to feed
TheLette · 21/12/2020 21:07

I went to a&e 3 or 4 weeks ago and was allowed to take in my breastfed baby but not my partner. We were even taken to a separate area so I could breastfeed (I didn't ask for this but appreciated it as it was away from everyone else!).

Dopeyduck · 21/12/2020 21:31

You do not need to leave your 3 week old BF baby under any circumstances (unless you want to). Take baby in a sling / pram and explain. Get DH to wait in car. You’ll have to call him in if needed.
If the clinic can’t facilitate this you’ll have to wait in the car with DH and baby and they’ll have to call you when they’re ready to see you.

You’re nursing, they can’t separate you from the baby but they don’t have to accommodate DH. You migh just have to deal with the pain and the baby for the appointment.