To ask what made you stop drinking?

[Lalaloveyou2020]

I have never had a good relationship with alcohol but used to limit my drinking to the weekends only. Since lockdown I have been indulging in wine three times a week. Started off as just a glass or two but now having nearly whole bottle at each sitting. I have started blacking out, I start arguments with my partner, I feel like shit. Mentally I don't think I can cope with drinking so much. I'd like to give up alcohol completely but a part of me thinks that's too extreme...but then problem drinkers never think they have a problem. Have you given up alcohol? Would I be unreasonable to ask for a few words of encouragement?

I never get drunk, and haven’t been for about 25 years. I can have a glass of wine every night but i dont, 3-4 nights. I enjoy it. I know its out if habit, hit 8pm and i have a glass. I’ll have a go in January, once i drink all i have. Don’t go on a health thing as im already healthy and run loads but I’d like to break the habit.

I think it’s easier to stop altogether than moderate as if you try and moderate there’s always the temptation to have another one, finish the bottle etc, and always a ‘reason’ to have a drink- had a bad day, good day, it’s a Friday/birthday/ bank holiday etc etc.
I went from regular at home drinking to stopping and not had anything for nearly 4 years. As already mentioned if you don’t drink it’s more definite and you won’t get encouraged by others to have another one.
Yes it can be hard stopping but I found that people are actually very supportive when you say you’ve stopped drinking. Read about it too as there are a lot of good books.

I stopped as I was fed up with feeling guilty about it, fed up with feeling below par in the mornings, it is such a time waster too just sitting around having a drink in the evenings and not doing much else. I’d also had enough of mentally working out how much I’d had to drink and of waking up at 3 in the morning worrying about things. Go for it. Soberistas online was so helpful.

Definitely easier to stop completely than moderate. I recommend Annie Grace too and also Quit like a Woman by Holly Whitaker. I'm on five months now and actually don't think about it hardly, it's like I've separated myself from it whereas before I would be constantly totting up my weekly intake and making deals with myself. Now I think I'm learning how to deal with uncomfortable feelings instead of escaping and avoiding in a bottle.

Migraines stopped me from drinking and while sad that it would be nice to have a drink every now and again I don’t feel like I’m missing out on much.

I stopped drinking when I finally accepted that it was rarely ‘just one’ for me, and the consequences of my drinking started to get bad.

I stopped when I got pregnant, then just didn't start again. Had been prone to bingeing quite a lot before,then suffering the after effects.
Afterwards I was exhausted from the birth, getting up with the baby and I had PND. I realised that the morning after feeling and young children don't go together so was alcohol free for years. I saw this as being something good I could do for myself, to give me the best chance of getting myself back on track MH-wise.
I started having a drink again (just occasionally) and found it triggered migraines so I stopped again.
I will never drink again now I think. I don't miss it, though I still get some weird comments or funny looks and even one or two people who have tried to get me to have a drink, but I don't go on about it so I can only assume that some people feel a bit insecure about their own drinking and that's why they act that way.
I tend to drive on nights out so I have a reason that no one can argue with to say no thanks.
I drink non alcoholic beer which I like, just on a hot day and with a curry.
I have never looked back.

I'm really grateful that I'm just not bothered about drinking. Sometimes, an ice cold beer is bloody lovely but on the whole, I'm just not fussed. I have had substance abuse issues though (soon to celebrate 12th clean year!) so I've probably had the desire to drink 'therapied' out of me.

One thing I did learn is that change can only come from within. We could give you the kindest, most caring words of encouragement but you have to want to stop.

Do you want to stop? Don't feel like you have to say you do, just because we are listening. If you think you should stop but don't really want to then there will be difficulties. You'll make excuses, think 'I've not drank for six days, surely I deserve a small glass...', tell yourself 'I can handle it, I'm not an alcoholic', all sorts of things to justify a drink.

If it is a case of 'should' rather than 'want' then we really need to get you to want. Would a sad story help? A good friends twin sister died recently. She was 43. She was a full blown alcoholic, probably since she was about 20-ish. Last month, she had a bleed to the brain, began a seizure and never woke up. Turns out her kidneys and liver had failed. 43 though...

I took being pregnant to give up the booze for me. I used to be a bottle of wine a night person but I’m a happy drunk so no arguments. I am due to have my baby soon but I fully understand that I will not be able to start drinking again, not to that level anyway.

If it is a case of 'should' rather than 'want' then we really need to get you to want. Would a sad story help? A good friends twin sister died recently. She was 43. She was a full blown alcoholic, probably since she was about 20-ish. Last month, she had a bleed to the brain, began a seizure and never woke up. Turns out her kidneys and liver had failed. 43 though...

@ViciousJackdaw , almost identical to a colleague of mine. 2 young girls. So sad.

I would recommend signing up to Annie Grace - The alcohol Experiment. I also like the book - The unexpected joy of being sober. Initially I would suggest trying to aim for 1 day less a week or only half a bottle then a glass and then lower it down slowly until its a level you are happy with. The other option is stopping completely. It depends what you want to achieve.

I was heavy drinker until babies. 3 successive pregnancies and small people stopped me drinking all togther as dh worked away. Now even small amounts make me feel ill the next day. Food (sweets and cakes and biscuits) however is a problem for me now instead.

If it's not in the house then would you go out to buy a bottle?

My dad was an alcoholic and always had an awful relationship with us as a result. I always felt like we weren’t enough for him to stop. I hated it and never really liked alcohol because of our family so it was an easy decision to one day just stop. I don’t miss it and it’s been really easy for me but appreciate it won’t be for everyone.

I know this post was a few years ago, but do you mind me asking what medical condition it is? I like to have a drink but lately it just does not agree with me anymore and I don’t know why! I totally understand if you do not wish to disclose this x

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