Now, I know this is nothing compared to what others have going on (even compared to our own current worries but it's really starting to get to me.
DS (just turned 3) is due to be starting preschool in January. We live on a small estate with its own primary school so this is the school he will be going to. It looks like a lovely school, good results etc so I'm happy enough. We've only lived on this estate for a year and nearby for about 6 months before that whilst we moved from a completely different city. Due to all the madness this year obviously we haven't managed to make any friends, create any sort of support network up here so I don't know anyone who has children at the school.
I put DSs name down for the preschool as soon as we moved to the city as we'd moved from a busy city with competition over places but all well here, plenty of space.
My vague plan was to start DS on a couple of mornings at the private nursery (which is on the same grounds as the school) early this year but obviously first lockdown scuppered that and it seemed silly to start him somewhere later on this summer only to move him a few months later.
Finally had a letter from the school asking me to confirm his place in late October and saying that they were offering only afternoon places, not ideal for us but I do understand given bubbles and everything. I sent the form back and heard nothing.
I was starting to worry they hadn't received the form so rang the school and they did confirm they had him down and that they'd be able to get information packs out at some point but they were struggling, again, fair enough. They were very apologetic about the delay.
I was finally contacted to pick up the information pack last week. The cover letter says that the foundation lead 'intends' to ring all parents during this last week of term. It also says that I'll be sent an 'all about me' form so they can get to know DS. Neither have happened yet. I know it's not the end of the week yet but it's cutting it fine in terms of rescheduling if necessary. It's a mix of old and new info but so frustrating to see the bits about the introductory meeting and home visits that should have happened.
This information pack now tells me, just a few weeks before starting, that DS needs to wear a uniform(nothing about this on the website.) It's not cheap and presumably DS is going to get it mucky so I'm going to need a few of everything. I've had a chance to look at trousers and all grey school trousers have fasteners. I'm sure this won't be a problem but DS is not that long out of pull ups and is doing amazingly but is almost always in jogging bottoms or soft trousers. It just seems a big ask to introduce zips and the like at the same time as inevitable nervousness about using the toilet away from parents for the first time. It also specifies black shoes, not trainers but the only non trainer shoes I can find in DS size are pumps, not really suitable for the weather. I'm not sure how I feel about him wearing a uniform at such a young age...it all seems a bit much.
It also talks about expected levels of attendance, totally fine for reception but surely they can't be too strict about the occasional afternoon off for a 3 year old!? I don't mind him being in a slightly more formal setting as he's a bright boy and enjoys doing letters and numbers and things but I'm not sure whether it's going to be too much.
Basically, I'm worried (not unusual for me) about the fact that I've had to make this huge decision for DS with no opportunity to visit, it's not informed at all. There are options, he could go to the private nursery, but I also can't visit there to see what it's like. Obviously I also don't have to send him but there aren't any toddler groups and I'm desperate for him to start socialising.
He's a bit shy and has had almost no interaction with other children since early this year. I've been a SAHM so he's not been in any kind of childcare before. I think it's going to be such a massive transition for him and that's fine and to be expected but there's no allowance for that at the moment. I totally understand why but the thought of leaving him outside the school gates to be taken through to the classroom by someone he and I have never met, never spoken to, don't even know the name of just seems very sudden and hard.
I've been reading him some general starting nursery books and talking about it all but further than that I'm struggling to know what to say when I don't even know the name of his class teacher, don't know what the classroom looks like or how it's set up. I don't even know what entrance I'm supposed to be leaving him at, it's almost as if the school assumes that you know a lot of these things.
Of course the letter also said to ring if there were any questions and I did try but couldn't get through.
So, AIBU to be stressed and a bit unhappy about how things are going. Don't get me wrong, I totally understand how difficult things are for schools at the moment and I'm fully prepared for you all to tell me that I'm being a bit precious, in fact, I'd welcome it!