To put a stop to exSIL sending me post

[SeasonallySnowyPeasant]

TLDR: exSIL is exH's sister and lives abroad. After we split I made a huge effort to take the DC to see her and her family when they came to the UK, invited them to dinner etc. SIL was nice to my face and then slagged me off to all and sundry. Someone told me, I called her out on it, she threw a tantrum and I haven't heard from her since. This was ~5 years ago.

In the last few months she's started sending cards to me and the kids. Two cards arrived this morning. WIBU to write back telling her not to contact me and to send anything for the DC to exH's address?

You still sound furious with her 5 years later, is she worth your energy?

If not, just chuck the cards in the bin - she probably won't bother again.

If you want something more positive, as we are all human and make massive cock wombles of ourselves one stage or another - open the card, wait 24 hrs and then decide if you want to re-connect or bin off - but save yourself the postage if you want to leave it.

Maybe just our ‘return to sender’ on the cards (if they have return address on the back)? Either that or bin them.

She wants correspondence simply bin the cards and ignore , if you return or even contact her asking her not to it opens communication. I’ve learned this with batshit no contact family.

I'm not furious with her. I hadn't even thought about how in however long before these cards started showing up. I just don't want to be reminded of someone who gave me a public, two-faced kicking when I was going through such a horrible time.

I'll sleep on it. Plan ATM is not to engage and put anything that arrives for the kids in an envelope to send to exH's house.

I didn't sleep on it. I discussed with DH (who jokingly suggested telling her not to write unless she's sending presents ) and sent her a very bland Moonpig card.

Hi x
I have received your cards. We haven't been in touch for over 4 years and as I'm sure you can imagine, I don't wish to receive correspondence reminding me of someone who gave me a two-faced, public kicking when I was going through such an awful time. Please do not contact me. If you want to contact the children, please do so using exH's contact details rather than sending post to my home. His address if you don't have it is... Any further correspondence sent to my home will go straight in the bin.

I wish you and your family well.
SSP

Ha, I take it back, well done for saying how you feel, that must be cathartic.

Well that was certainly very clear. 😁

It certainly felt good to stand up for myself. DH's only concern was that she might kick off to exH about it. I pointed out that that wasn't my problem!

That is beautifully done! Hope you have a nice quiet Christmas

I wish all OPs on here were like you. Some of the dithering/terrified of offending someone (no matter how badly they’ve treated you) that you see on here is ridiculous.

Well done for setting up boundaries. No need to communicate further. If your EXH brings it up, tell him you don’t wish to discuss.

😂😂 love to know if you get a response