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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Would you fly to see family over Christmas ?

150 replies

christmastree00 · 15/12/2020 10:12

Whilst adhering to local rules of course. Covid Test and quarantine as appropriate as well as sticking to local rules of mixing etc.

OP posts:
yeOldeTrout · 15/12/2020 13:34

yeah, but, they don't want to see me!!
and quarantine even if symptom-free would be required for at least 10 days each way, which psychologically I find totally unacceptable.

My elderly parents just flew... said they were almost the only ones in first class and maybe 10% occupancy in economy class. They had masks & shields & now are isolating for 2 weeks before they will let themselves mix mask-free with the hosts they are staying with. I can't live up to their requirements.

MrsToothyBitch · 15/12/2020 13:43

I wouldn't. Quarantine aside, we've had serious respiratory illnesses in the family after flying so I'd be really careful with the possibility of covid. Nearly empty plane or not. Only takes one.

corythatwas · 15/12/2020 13:53

My elderly father has recently returned from the Caribbean and had a great time. He's way more gusty then me.

It's not all about him though, is it? If he does end up infected, he won't just be in danger himself- he will have been a danger to anyone he came in contact with, he may have carried a deadly disease to a new place, and he will be a danger to anyone who has to nurse him.

UntilYourNextHairBrainedScheme · 15/12/2020 14:05

christmastree00 are you sure you won't be in quarantine for 2 weeks both ends?

houseinthesnow · 15/12/2020 14:06

Holidays are the reason why we ended up with a second wave.

christmastree00 · 15/12/2020 14:07

No I don't need to quarantine both ends for two weeks. I'll need to quarantine 10 days when I get back.

OP posts:
christmastree00 · 15/12/2020 14:10

I don't think it was just holidays why we ended up with a second wave. They definitely contributed, but it was just mixing. Any mixing will make it go up. Hence why Christmas mixing isn't a good idea. Here or anywhere else. Travel or not. It's not the plane. There have been countless articles about flying being relatively low risk. It's mixing with no masks that spreads this. Not so much places with vigorous social distancing.

OP posts:
EnPoinsettia · 15/12/2020 14:10

No

thepeopleversuswork · 15/12/2020 14:12

God no. Wouldn't even cross a county line. Too much grief.

UntilYourNextHairBrainedScheme · 15/12/2020 14:12

It still seems like a stupid thing to do, though not as stupid as your friend flying with 5 month old babies and your elderly father taking carabean holidays in the middle of a pandemic.

shinynewapple2020 · 15/12/2020 14:16

For me it would depend on

Virus levels where you live
Virus levels where you are going
The length of the flight
Your parents age and health
When you last saw your parents

You have said that the flight is quite short , but I'd be wary that at this time of year flights and airports may be busier

If your parents are 50s/60s and healthy - less of a risk but chances are you have plenty of time left with them .

If they are very elderly and you haven't seen them for a while - well if it was me I would probably travel , stay in a hotel and do brief visits following usual Covid safety, as long as they are happy with this .

It saddens me sometimes to read on here that people have very elderly relatives who are begging to see them but they refuse a visit because Covid forgetting that for some it's quality of life rather than quantity, at that age .

I'm guessing though from what you say about your friends ages that you are similar age yourself so your parents maybe around 60?)

ColdTattyWaitingForSummer · 15/12/2020 14:19

Ds1 is a student, and various of them are flying home for the holidays (albeit within the UK, but I bet some of the international students will too.) So I guess it’s just risk assessing and following the rules at each end.

merrygoround51 · 15/12/2020 14:21

OP why are you asking the question? If you are not breaking any local rules and are comfortable, then just do it

AmICrazyorWhat2 · 15/12/2020 14:24

For me, It would depend on everyone’s health. My Dad/SM are in their 80’s and clinically vulnerable so there’s no way I’d visit them. They wouldn’t let me in the house if I tried to ( even with a negative text result)! If you and your parents are more confident in your health, you might feel differently.

With vaccines now being administered, though, I’d probably just wait at this point anyway.

UntilYourNextHairBrainedScheme · 15/12/2020 14:25

I'm surprised anyone has relatives flying in from the USA zo the EU, as the EU has closed its boarders to non EU tourists, and that includes visiting except birth, wedding and death visits.

AmICrazyorWhat2 · 15/12/2020 14:29

The OP describes it as a “short flight” so I don’t think it’s US to Europe.

SchrodingersImmigrant · 15/12/2020 14:31

@UntilYourNextHairBrainedScheme

I'm surprised anyone has relatives flying in from the USA zo the EU, as the EU has closed its boarders to non EU tourists, and that includes visiting except birth, wedding and death visits.
No they haven't closed their borders. They are just restricting some and demanding tests and quarantine of others as far as I know. Happy to be corrected though.
hammeringinmyhead · 15/12/2020 14:36

Nope. Wouldn't even give the thought 5 minutes headspace.

EileenGC · 15/12/2020 14:48

I'm flying over Christmas. 4 flights in total. A bit last-minute as the rules coming back home (from non-business trips) have only recently changed, and I won't have to quarantine anymore.

I would go, OP. I'm assuming your country of destination is like mine - you need to provide a negative test on entry, or take one straight away. If those you're seeing are fairly low-risk, and happy for you to go, I'd go. My mum just had Covid last month, my dad is a healthy 47 year old and my siblings are young and very low-risk. However, I'm not visiting elderly relatives, having a big family Christmas or mixing with other friends. It'll be low-key but that's how everything has been this year.

Flying is a very safe way to travel even during Covid. I've taken 18 flights since March, and I never felt safer. I am regularly tested at work (2-3 times per week), and since August also had tests before/after most flights. Not a single positive one.

Airlines won't let you fly without a properly fitted mask, and they don't tolerate any nonsense. I have seen a few cases where passengers were asked to get off the plane, unless their mask covered mouth AND nose. Funny how those saying 'but I can't breathe when it's over my nose' produced a variety of masks from their handbags in less than 5 seconds, when told that it was either the mask, or disembarking. If you're exempt, you provide a medical certificate stating so, and the airline tries to seat you in an empty area of the plane if possible.

I've only seen passengers trying to argue about the mask on flights to/from the UK btw. Everyone else seems to get on with it.

The planes are deep-cleaned much more often now, and have HEPA filters which means the risk of passing Covid to everyone on board is very low. Sure, if the person sat right next to you happens to be an asymptomatic, high-viral-load positive carrier, chances are you will catch it. But flights haven't ever been the source of a big outbreak. It's the lack of measures on them (back in Feb/Mar or even more important, people ignoring quarantine/testing on landing.

The airports are very quiet. They give you wipes and hand gel when you get on the plane. Again before a pre-packed lunch or a bottle of water or whatever. Ryanair don't spend the whole flight asking you if you want a drink, a cheese and ham panini, a bottle of perfume or some scratch cards. It's bliss.

EileenGC · 15/12/2020 14:50

@christmastree00

I don't think it was just holidays why we ended up with a second wave. They definitely contributed, but it was just mixing. Any mixing will make it go up. Hence why Christmas mixing isn't a good idea. Here or anywhere else. Travel or not. It's not the plane. There have been countless articles about flying being relatively low risk. It's mixing with no masks that spreads this. Not so much places with vigorous social distancing.
Hadn't read your last post but this is pretty much it! Much better summary than mine Grin
christmastree00 · 15/12/2020 16:03

@EileenGC yeah I've also read a lot of info and research about planes being safe. It's the places you don't have to wear a mask that are the problem I think. I'm not that worried about catching it traveling there as I also wouldn't use public transport to get there. So perhaps one test a few days before I fly and then strict quarantine like you have to do before you go to hospital for a procedure would be the way to do it. And then a test on arrival too.

OP posts:
EileenGC · 15/12/2020 16:19

@christmastree00 sounds like you've done your research and are happy to travel there. I think if you're careful in the week prior to travelling/once you there, it should be as safe as it can be.

I'm going to Spain where masks have to be worn everywhere, indoors and outdoors, so I don't have that dilemma. The only people that will get to see my face will be my parents and siblings Xmas Grin Even when I meet some friends for a walk, we'll have to be in masks at all times. I did it in summer and it was so hot but I got through it, I'm sure this time round it'll be much more comfortable.

Being far away from family and friends this year has been hard. If you decide to go, I hope you have a wonderful time over the holidays and that all of you can stay safe and healthy.

FuzzyPuffling · 15/12/2020 16:21

No. Just no.

christmastree00 · 15/12/2020 16:25

@EileenGC thank you ! You too ! Yes where I would be going you also have to wear masks outside and compliance is very good. Somehow cases are high anyway though. Have a safe trip !

OP posts:
TheThingWithFeathers · 15/12/2020 16:27

I wouldn't. I think anyone who is still travelling for leisure/holidays at the moment just because they can is pretty selfish to be honest.

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