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AIBU?

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Original poster

To be a bit miffed by this?

63 replies

wizzardchristmass · 14/12/2020 09:15

Il start by saying this isn't actually a msssive big deal and I'm aware of that.
Me and my close friend organised to go Christmas shopping today.
Both haven't been into town since the lockdown and we're excited to go for dinner and go in the shops.
Yesterday she was very quiet and she texts saying "hi sorry I couldn't wait any longer so I did my Christmas shopping today with (boyfriend ) I was too excited to wait"
Il still meet for lunch tomorrow tho but not gonna look around the shops again.
We've had today planned for 6 weeks.
Would you be a bit miffed?
She couldn't wait 16 hours longer ?

OP posts:
OrigamiOwl · 14/12/2020 10:16

I'd be unimpressed too, she's shown you how unimportant you are to her.

MummBraTheEverLeaking · 14/12/2020 10:25

"I was too excited to wait" is a shit excuse though, I'm assuming this is a grown woman not a 5 year old. If there were money worries among me and my friends we'd be honest with each other, and at least still go round the shops.

More like the boyfriend wanted to go Christmas shopping and friend sacked the OP off for that. She could still go round the shops with OP, it's the least she could do.

Ihopeyourcakeisshit · 14/12/2020 10:28

Speaking as someone who hates shopping with other people, I still think it's a shitty thing to do.
I'd certainly not be meeting her for lunch.

PlanDeRaccordement · 14/12/2020 10:29

Normally, I’d be miffed. But this is Covid year and honestly the deaths in U.K. just keep rising. The whole exception for Christmas rules are complete madness from an epidemiological standpoint. It is actually more sensible for you to not meet up to do Christmas shopping and a meal out as that is two households mixing that do not need to mix. So, I would forgive her for it this year as it is an exceptional year.

OppsUpsSide · 14/12/2020 10:34

I’d imagine her bf had kicked up a fuss tbh, but maybe that’s just me projecting

myhobbyisouting · 14/12/2020 10:36

Doesn't matter whether she's embarrassed about money because joining the OP in walking around the shops wouldn't cost her a penny.

I wouldn't be meeting her for lunch

DuckbilledSplatterPuff · 14/12/2020 10:43

Its less busy on a Monday than a weekend. If she's prepared to meet for lunch she ought to at least spend an hour or two before or after shopping with you.
If she's worried about Covid she should be honest about it. But she was fine shopping yesterday and her excuse was she couldn't wait. She didnt use boyfriend as excuse.
I'd be cheesed off with her, but I do think you get more shopping done on one's own.
Is there another friend who might join you for part of the day?
If not try not to let this get to you and enjoy the fact that you are free to choose how to spend your day, are able to go shopping and have buy some nice gifts for people you care about and are independent enough to get on with what you want to do regardless of people who are unreliable. I hope you have a good time today despite this set back.

VainAbigail · 14/12/2020 10:44

I was too excited to wait

Is your friend a child?? How utterly ridiculous and twee.

Also @Ponoka7 the OP was planning to shop with one person, how does that become “a group activity”?

MolyHolyGuacamole · 14/12/2020 10:47

@Santaisironingwrappingpaper

Arrange to meet at 1. Text her at 1245 and say you are sat eating lunch at home as you simply couldn't wait to eat...
Grin
FilledSoda · 14/12/2020 10:56

If covid or finances were the real reason she would have said that , either of those are better than ' couldn't wait'.
I don't understand why she can't go round the shops with you anyway .
I wouldn't want to meet for lunch now , especially if it was just a pit stop, there's not much point for half an hour or whatever and you have a lot to do .

Stompythedinosaur · 14/12/2020 11:03

I think that's a chappy thing to do to you really. I dont think I'd want to meet for lunch, I'd maybe be saying "That's frustrating after I waited for you! Let's just give the whole thing a miss shall we."

Stompythedinosaur · 14/12/2020 11:03

*crappy

Beautiful3 · 14/12/2020 11:15

If she said this but wanted to accompany me around the shops, I'd be okay with this. However she's cancelled the whole shopping trip, and wants to come for lunch! I would just go alone and get it sorted, or meet at the end of your shopping.

Chloemol · 14/12/2020 11:16

Yes I would be annoyed. I would also cancel lunch and just go on my own, get it done and come home, I would be able to be civil to her if we still met.

FrankieDoyle · 14/12/2020 11:19

What a selfish thing to do.

MegaClutterSlut · 14/12/2020 11:33

Yanbu I'd be proper pissed off

Chamomileteaplease · 14/12/2020 11:40

I would see it as a win win situation.

You get to go shopping without having to wait for hours while your friend wants to queue for shops or tills that you don't need. You don't have to try not to lose her amongst the crowds inside and out.

But when you rest for lunch you get to have a friend to meet up with and chat to. Then off you go again, unemcumbered. Smile

But yes she was a cow Grin

Simplyunacceptable · 14/12/2020 11:41

If you’re tier 2 you can’t meet indoors anyway so unless you’re in a different country or tier 1, you’re breaking the rules even meeting up. Sorry to be a ball buster, just saying...

WhatKatyDidNxt · 14/12/2020 11:42

She wasn’t “too excited to wait”. She binned you off for her boyfriend. I would be miffed by this

DreadingSeason2020sFinale · 14/12/2020 12:02

For a full grown married woman with kids, I'm a huge, nervy coward and hate shopping alone. I never, ever do unless it's the corner shop. If this happened I just couldn't go and would end up doing a massive online shop from Amazon and the like.

I like PPs suggestion of setting the meet for 1pm and then saying just before that you were just too excited to wait!

OP, as she went shopping at the weekend when we are all aware shopping centres are at their busiest, Covid clearly is not the issue. As she did all her shopping, money is also probably not either (plus today she could have just window shopped)

OP, I'm sorry. She got a better offer and fucked your meet up off.

Cocomarine · 14/12/2020 12:12

@Santaisironingwrappingpaper

Arrange to meet at 1. Text her at 1245 and say you are sat eating lunch at home as you simply couldn't wait to eat...
Love this!

I would care about a friend shopping first with their boyfriend - but to then cancel, just rude.

Danni91 · 14/12/2020 12:25

I'd 100% prefer going shopping for Christmas with my OH than a friend.
We would be buying for our families so it would make sense.
How ever I do often pop to the smaller places with friends and then for coffee.

I'd never ditch an entire day because i wouldn't plan it (antisocial fuck aint I!)

I wouldn't bother meeting her for lunch if your angry, it will be uncomfortable.

Anyone else you can pop to town with at short notice?

shumway · 14/12/2020 12:27

I'd be more than a bit miffed.

WitchesBritchesPumpkinPants · 14/12/2020 12:33

I HATE shopping, the only thing (Shopping wise) I HATE more is shopping with other people AND this year I'm going nowhere near actual shops

However, I think your friend has been horrible, she's ditched you at the last minute, to find something quite important that you might not want to do alone.

'Too excited' is either a lie or just ridiculous.

I wouldn't meet her fir lunch because I'd rather get in & do my own thing and I wouldn't be able to hide how Pissed Off I was.

Good zluck wuth your shopping!

burnoutbabe · 14/12/2020 12:40

this year, i prefer shopping with partner than a friend/mum. As you can actually stand next to them and chat. going shopping with my mum when we visited was a constant "oh i have something to comment on"/oh no I need to stand away from her. But close enough to speak.

Its pretty exhausting. Now lunch is fine, easy to stay in same place and be safe(ish)

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