Is this online harassment?

[FluffyTowels7]

Good Morning all!

Well, at the grand old age of 33 I definitely didn’t think I would be writing about petty things like social media..but here we are!

So my Facebook page is public. This is because I’m in acting (very amateurish no big tv roles landed yet lol) but I have it on public so people can see links to my casting videos etc. I also am one of those very annoying people who do status updates constantly, but to be honest it made my feel a bit better during lockdown so that’s why I do it.
I also have a YouTube channel and I am part of a local drama group.

Recently, I have been receiving messages from a fake Facebook account: no friends in common, no photos everything is set to private, basically messaging me every time I post a status and ripping it apart in someway, calling it stupid etc.
None of these messages are threatening, or say that they want to come and hurt me..they are mainly about my statuses and how my mental health must be bad if I’m bored enough to post everyday.
I haven’t responded to this person, no have I blocked them I have just ignored them.

I have also recently had comments on my YouTube saying how I can’t act etc and an email was sent to my dramatic group saying how none of us could act.

It could be the same person, I don’t know. I know having a YouTube channel everyone gets mean comments etc.

Do you think any of this is bad enough to take to the police? I don’t want to waste anyone’s time. Do you think they will ask why I haven’t blocked them?

Thanks for any guidance!

@MotherExtraordinaire @NekoShiro thank you. It was more out of interest when I googled ‘online bullying’ even though I wasn’t sure this even is bullying - it came up with malicious communications (which is what a PP had also mentioned) or harassment and if it’s either of those situations then it would be a police matter. I think I just wanted to make sure what was happening to me wasn’t either of those because I don’t want to waste police time at all!
I wonder how many online mean comments people do actually go to the police over and if there is a threshold? A friend of mine was getting hassled on Instagram and the police said they couldn’t do anything as it was a fake account. Someone then emailed my friend at her work(!!!) saying really mean things and at that point the police looked into it.
There are some strange people around that’s for sure

Come on. Block them and move on. The police really have more important matters to deal with...

@Requinblanc I agree! That’s why I came on here to ask advice because the last thing I want to do is report something that the police can do nothings about, I just wanted to see what others would do if they were in my situation. I know that the police will have a million things to do and I’m very conscious of wasting anyone’s time I wouldn’t do that!

OP you haven't explained why you haven't just blocked them

Sorry @lockdownalli I didn’t want them thinking they had got to me so I just pressed ignore instead

I would block them. It's really not worth the hassle. Someone (possibly someone you know) has decided to take you down a peg or do for whatever reason. I get sleazy messages from random blokes on instagram occasionally (which I only use to post my seascape photos) and I always block them.

@MaelyssQ thanks you’re right. I’ve also shot myself in the foot because I haven’t taken those proactive steps of blocking them which I’m assuming would be what the police would ask me anyway, I did see somewhere that if the person is still allowing the messages to come through there’s not much anyone can do etc. And the nature of the messages isn’t exactly alarming, just mean!

Block them.

You probably don't know them. It's prolly a thirteen year boy in Slough or wherever.

@jojomolo haha this made me laugh! But you’re probably right, that’s probably exactly who it is. It’s just the fact that it’s my Facebook and my YouTube and my drama group but I guess that’s what I get for having my page as public?

Don't just block them, report them to Facebook first and take screenshots.

Its not really a police matter unless they are very numerous or are threatening. Are they threatening?

Its likely an ex or a former female friend or a wierdo of some sort. They thrive off reaction so don't give them any, unless you can track them down and scare them!

A lot of people are jealous of those who are talented/more attractive than them and online harassment is a pretty cowardly way for them to attack people.

@GreenlandTheMovie it’s been going on pretty much since the beginning of lockdown 1 - but it’s not multiple messages a day. If I’ve posted a status that day they will make their dig and then that’s it. None of the messages are threatening. Mean? Yes! But not threatening. I’ve never engaged in a conversation with them at all.
They haven’t been every day since March..they will be for most days and then I will hear nothing for a couple of weeks and then they do it again but on the days that actually do message, it’s always in relation to whatever I’ve posted on my wall that day

How many messages in total? On all forums? Is anyone else targetted individually? Are the messages personally abusive at all? Theres not been any other strange incidents, such as damage to a car or house, or have you noticed anyone following you?

Thats quite a long time that its been going on. At some point, a large number of messages while not in themselves overtly threatening will meet the harassment test for reporting to the police, because it indicates a worrying level of obsession. Particularly if posted from multiple accounts.

I'm sure this isn't at that stage. I think you should turn detective and try and find out who it is.

No, no strange incidents or anything like that at all and the messages are in no way threatening, I don’t think they have even sworn! The messages on Facebook are purely in relation to whatever I’ve posted that day and on YouTube they will just say how I can’t act etc. Harassment test? I heard that for it to be classed as harassment I have to of said leave me alone, which I admit I haven’t done

Is there a way to edit your status update on Facebook so that you only share it will actual followers? Or maybe just only post professional stuff and then make another Facebook for family and friends ?

TBH I would've blocked this person already!

And stop posting updates everyday, it is annoying :)

@GreenlandTheMovie I should also mention that my mobile number is on my page and I’ve never had any disturbing texts or calls from numbers I don’t know (apart from scam calls)

@jumperweather I know re status updates to be honest Throughout lockdown I posted more than I would usually due to being home all the time!

Surely your acting videos can go on YouTube and your fb be private?

YABU

Of course the police will ask why you haven’t blocked them! You do have some personal responsibility to protect yourself before running to the police. Like locking your front door so you don’t get burgled.

If you're posting personal statuses every day on the same page as content you're hoping will get you acting work then I think you should rethink regardless of the messages. While it's a hobby, if you use a platform to show casting directors or groups what you do in the hope of acting roles then it's silly to be putting personal statuses in the same place. I would set up a separate page for your acting stuff regardless, will look more professional and appealing to those who don't know you.

@Brighterthansunflowers hi, yes I’m going to look into doing two different pages one personal and one public. Currently on my Facebook I have my personal email and my phone number (which on reflection maybe wasn’t the best idea) but with acting, jobs are so few and far between I thought I should put my details somewhere where the relevant people could see. I’ve had no nasty emails to that email address or to my mobile number so they had an extra opportunity there to message me that way and they haven’t.

You’re right I should be proactive and block, I imagine I’d get asked why that hadn’t he done as it shows I’m keeping the lines of communication open even though I’m not engaging with them

@youvegottenminuteslynn hi no I don’t post statuses in the hope of work, I just post statuses because it’s just the one Facebook I have! But I see you’re point, definitely thinking of having two separate

[quote FluffyTowels7]@youvegottenminuteslynn hi no I don’t post statuses in the hope of work, I just post statuses because it’s just the one Facebook I have! But I see you’re point, definitely thinking of having two separate[/quote]
Yep I meant posting personal statuses not about work on the same page on which you also post content hoping to get work and showcase work is what might look unprofessional or a bit offputting. Definitely a good idea to have two separate pages

I work in TV and was a professional actor for many years.

This kind of thing is sadly very common. Basically everyone with even the slightest bit of profile gets stalkers and weirdos. And plenty of actors with no profile do as well. It might be someone you know in real life but it's more than likely just some troll.

Agree - just block, and create a 'Page' on FB for yourself as an actor that's separate from your personal profile. A page looks more professional than a profile anyway.

Having said that, if the messages do get threatening then call 101. I have friends who have dealt with death threats and online stalking and the police took it very seriously.

Hi @EmilyinWolverhampton you’re so right and I will be making two pages - one for acting and one private. There are some weirdos out there and I think that’s what’s going on in my situation. I haven’t heard any death threats (there’s a sentence I never thought I’d say)! the messages are catty but nothing threatening. Maybe they just really don’t like my acting! 😭 lol or maybe this is my first encounter of a ‘troll’!