...to stop taking in parcels for my neighbour?

[ERest]

I live in a semi-detached new build and moved in about the same time as my neighbours on either side (over a year now). I have had lots of neighbours, and never had an issue taking in a neighbours parcels when they are unavailable. I don't have this issue with any of the other neighbours and have received parcels for different neighbours since we moved here.
The neighbour we share a party wall with are a young couple who have a 1 year old (This is relevant as I initially thought part of the problem was to avoid disturbing their little one).
Now for the issue. Whenever we take in a parcel for them, they never come over to pick this up immediately. The earliest they have done is 3 days later, and I usually get fed up and take it to them. The longest so far is a week, and they didn't pick it up. We have a really small entry way, you open the door and the stairs are right in front of you so there is no space to keep packages and it just takes up space on the stairs. Before the pandemic lockdown, I didn't think too much of it, as I just thought everyone was busy with work. Since the lockdown, I have just come to the conclusion that they don't like to come for their parcels, especially the DH. I took the parcel over one time, when they had not come for 4 days, and she seemed upset to see me when she opened the door. I politely asked if the postie had not left a 'something for you' card, to which she replied: yes, but her DH was meant to come over to collect the parcel. He heard her, and shouted back that he had just not had the time! I mostly feel sorry for the delivery folks, but I am at the point where I don't care about helping them out anymore.
A couple of weeks ago, I told the postie that someone was in when they brought the parcel over. They agreed but said they had knocked for a while but they not opening their door, and would I mind? I used to think perhaps the little one was sleeping but another event has made me realise he really just can't be bothered (He is home more than she is, perhaps works from home like we do). I arrived and was parking just as he was going in with their child. They both waved, and i waved back but then noticed he had forgotten his keys on the door. This did not take up to a minute, as I went to knock to alert him. It took him another 3 minutes of me now knocking loudly before he opened the door!
I know they get the delivery cards as I have begun waiting to see the postie leaves a card for them. I had told my DH not to take in any more parcels for them as they never pick up, but am now wondering if IABU. This has come up again because my DH received another parcel for them yesterday morning, and it remains uncollected till now. We have the same exact layout, and I can hear the knock from the farthest room on the top floor even though we have no doorbell.
So AIBU?
YABU - they could be hard of hearing, might not want to disturb the DC
YANBU - I would never take another parcel for them.

Just knock and leave it on their doorstep. Refuse any further parcels.

The cheeky twats! OP you have been kind for long enough now - time to stop taking in their parcels. They are ungrateful and sound rude as hell.

One of the neighbours on our street was like that. They've moved now but before that I'd gradually told each of the delivery people that I was really sorry that I couldn't take parcels for them because they never collected. They all knew I was happy to take parcels for other neighbours and were fine with me about it. Life's too short!

There's one of these parcel threads every week and the answer is always the same. Stop taking in the parcels and no you aren't being unreasonable.
It's a complete pain in the arse when you take in a parcel for someone and they don't bother to come and pick it up or you have to take it round for them.
I stopped a few years ago. I'm upstairs in a block of flats where we all have separate front doors. I can hear my neighbours when they are in downstairs. Delivery people would come up the external stairs to my flat at all hours (often as early as 7 am) with parcels for everyone else. As I work from home I'm always in so I think the couriers just realized that and that it was easy to knock here rather than knock at various other neighbours and wait to see if they were in.
I got really pissed off with it in the end especially when one guy woke me up with a parcel for the people downstairs who were actually in at the time. I asked if he'd knocked as they were in and he said he hadn't.
After that I just refused to take any parcels for anyone and the couriers and posties quickly got the message and that was the end of that.

I had this exact situation with my old neighbours. Constant deliveries everyday, and were left for days, I think the longest was just over a week because I refused to take it round, and they tried to say it was my fault because they didn't know if we were in to collect (which is bollocks because the walls are so thin, you can clearly hear people moving around). What was worse was they used to do it to the elderly neighbour, he was unsteady on his feet and had all these parcels crammed in his small conservatory, and he used to try and carry them all round on the uneven ground because they never got collected. How he didn't fall I dont know, it made me so angry. Anyway during lockdown we figured out that they were in when people knocked, they just ignored the door assuming that we would get them. So we stopped.

@ERest
I have neighbours like this and I now tell their delivery people to ask someone else because they are being lazy. They will soon get the message when you stop taking the parcels.

Stop taking them in.

I find this bizarre living in Australia, I've never had any courier or postal worker try and leave a parcel with a neighbor. I'm pretty sure they aren't allowed to do that.

Your neighbours can choose a drop off point for these parcels such as the post office, Royal mail delivery office etc Why don't they just do that and pick them up at their convenience if they don't like answering the door.

I'm completely baffled as to how somebody bringing your order direct to your door - when you are in - could possibly be less convenient for some people than having to go out somewhere else to fetch it. Would they really prefer to have to travel across town to fetch it than open their own door or go next door? It would appear that they do - or they lack the basic comprehension skills to realise that the goods they order will actually arrive.

If you don't want (your own) parcels being brought to your door, it's the simplest thing in the world to just not order anything in the first place. Do these people do the same thing in shops and cafes as well - just stand there like a numpty, not taking the tray or bag with their order on/in it from the assistant?

I like the idea of a big note on the door saying "We are very happy to take in parcels for any of our neighbours except for No 41". When the non-collecting people from 41 do finally come around for it, they will hopefully see the note and, just maybe, the penny might drop. It probably won't, though....

I never understand these people who don't come to get their parcels. Aren't they eager to have whatever it was they ordered? I'm usually checking the delivery status like a madwoman until my orders arrive, even if it's nothing something I urgently need.

Yes, maybe some people lack space (but why are they ordering more "stuff" if they don't have room for a box or two somewhere in their home?!) and possibly some have social anxiety or other condition that makes them put it off (I sympathise, but it has to be done sooner or later!). Still, what about the rest of them? Just lazy, I guess. Or too busy, as they'd probably phrase it.

*not something I urgently need

I wouldn’t take them no.

It’s one thing to take them in when they are genuinely out, but they must then come and pick up ASAP.

They are just taking the piss really

@WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll

Your neighbours can choose a drop off point for these parcels such as the post office, Royal mail delivery office etc Why don't they just do that and pick them up at their convenience if they don't like answering the door.

I'm completely baffled as to how somebody bringing your order direct to your door - when you are in - could possibly be less convenient for some people than having to go out somewhere else to fetch it. Would they really prefer to have to travel across town to fetch it than open their own door or go next door? It would appear that they do - or they lack the basic comprehension skills to realise that the goods they order will actually arrive.

If you don't want (your own) parcels being brought to your door, it's the simplest thing in the world to just not order anything in the first place. Do these people do the same thing in shops and cafes as well - just stand there like a numpty, not taking the tray or bag with their order on/in it from the assistant?

I like the idea of a big note on the door saying "We are very happy to take in parcels for any of our neighbours except for No 41". When the non-collecting people from 41 do finally come around for it, they will hopefully see the note and, just maybe, the penny might drop. It probably won't, though....

Some stuff can't be bought in a store, I regularly buy tools, fittings, findings and gemstones online that I cannot get in a store without driving several hundred miles or even, at all, if the supplier is in another country. Two of my suppliers are in Poland, one in the Netherlands...

If I were likely to be out, I'd have those orders dropped at a collection point nearby where they'd be safe rather than risk valuable stuff left on the doorstep, or being sent back to a depot two cities away.

I no longer take in parcels for any neighbours. I used to but my most recent ex-neighbours appeared to rely on it, didn't pick them up so I would drop them around and never once took anything in for me. I'm WFH so I'm around but I stopped doing it because I am working and why should I be inconvenienced when it doesn't work the other way around?

I no longer bother at all with neighbours and it's great. What happens to their parcels is none of your concern

I would say it's odd the Male neighbour doesn't answer the door but my brother in law is the same;won't answer the door or the landline phone if it's ringing.He's really antisocial.

I stopped taking parcels for massive CF neighbour when I noticed she was actually putting delivery instructions on her orders to deliver to number 7 (me) because she was too important to bother with being at home. She also "nicked" my tradesmen to do a "small job" for her - then messed them around and didn't pay them for a month.

Bloody awful woman.

Had this problem many moons ago at our old house. It stopped when I started to dump the parcels over the rear garden fence- big/small/marked fragile/ keep this way up etc. The CFs were in but couldn't be arsed to answer their own door.

I'd have stopped taking parcels in for them after the very first time they didn't turn up to collect one!

Thank you all, and some of these stories are even worse than mine, as they appear to be a pleasant couple othewise.
I can confirm they are yet to pick up their parcel since we collected it on Wednesday morning. I will wait to see how it takes them to collect this time.
With my Sherlock Holmes thinking hat on, he just might be pissed that she keeps ordering online, as most of the parcels are hers. Passive-aggressive way of showing it's not his delivery?

suggest that they leave a (small) note on the door to say to leave them round the back (or you could tell the person delivering to do that

Not OP’s problem.

Some stuff can't be bought in a store, I regularly buy tools, fittings, findings and gemstones online that I cannot get in a store without driving several hundred miles or even, at all, if the supplier is in another country. Two of my suppliers are in Poland, one in the Netherlands...

If I were likely to be out, I'd have those orders dropped at a collection point nearby where they'd be safe rather than risk valuable stuff left on the doorstep, or being sent back to a depot two cities away.

Oh, I realise that having things brought to your home isn't always the easiest way, especially if you have to co-ordinate it with when you're going to be in. A lot of people use those Amazon lockers - presumably it's easier for them to pop to the petrol station or corner shop on the way home from work if they aren't going to be in at home; but most people, like you, think ahead and plan/arrange for the most suitable collection place and time.

These are people who have chosen to have parcels delivered to their home and are then at home when the neighbour goes around with them - or they could go next door themselves at any reasonable time - but instead of answering the door when they're at home (and expecting a parcel) or popping next door when they see the car on the drive/lights on in the evening or whatever, they would apparently prefer to have to travel to the RM sorting office or regional courier depot during their opening hours instead of doing the above.

Update: The DH just picked up the parcel. Since Wednesday morning! Glad I didn't take it round this time, and this is the end. Thank you all, and have a good week.

Great news. They've burnt their bridges now, as you won't be taking any more parcels in for them, which I'm sure you would have been happy to still do if they'd treated you with respect and not an irritant for trying to help them.

Don't waver and, more importantly, make sure your DH doesn't. Friendly, considerate people do each other favours; these neighbours have manifestly demonstrated that they aren't friendly or considerate people.

Thank you@WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll. Definitely no more. I have shown my DH this thread as well, and we are in agreement this time.

I would stop taking them in. We have one neighbour we don’t take parcels for. They know they’re expecting a bundle over a week so prefer to just wait and collect them all at once... They were genuinely shocked when I pointed out I’m not a parcel holding service. I had 3 kids under 9 at the time and it’s bloody stressful keeping parcels handy enough to the door for when they’re collected, but away enough from the kids and the cat. The final straw was when they ordered stuff to come then didn’t collect it for four days then got arsey with me that we were away for the weekend so they couldn’t collect it when it suited them.