AIBU to ask views on image privacy?

[BaubleBubble]

Some parents on my school WhatsApp group are getting very angry about school’s proposals to post videos of Christmas choir online (with relevant consents being asked for).

Whilst I don’t see any reason for the school to publish these videos and would be happy for them to scrap the idea, I am not sure what the parents are so worried about.

Some kids may have abusive parents who could recognise them by picture and track them down to a school - I get this one. It’s not a relevant factor for the number of parents who are complaining.

Some weirdos might decide to take the pictures and amend them and use them for horrific purposes. But is that really likely, and then is it likely the child would ever know about this or be affected?

Would have thought the risk to a child is a lot bigger from driving in a car, choking on a grape, getting run over by another parent at the school gates, etc. I am not understanding the horror that’s unfolding in my inbox this week!

If you are a parent who’d have similar concerns, please share the worst case scenario you imagine might happen?

No way am I asking this on the WhatsApp group, not brave enough!

YABU - there is significant risk to child’s well-being in sharing a class video online. X,y,z might happen which you have not thought of.

YANBU - the risk to child’s well-being is negligible, parents are overreacting.

My friend is a foster parent and this would have cause huge issues. You end up with a handful of kids being pulled out, whilst the ones from "safe" backgrounds (not intended to insult) get to be showcased.

As long as the parents/guardians of everyone in the choir or are otherwise in the video give consent, then it's no problem.

If one doesn't, then the school should scrap the idea.

Its not worth all the angst.

We don't share our child's image online, simply because we think that's a choice they should make for themselves when they're old enough. For my kids (preschool and primary) they would get absolutely no benefit from it being online, it would only be for us, and that doesn't feel like a good enough reason.

I guess our default position is 'no' and we would expect someone to make a case as to why our child should be online, rather than have to make a case as to why they shouldn't. Everyone should have that right to just say 'no, I don't consent' - they don't need to give a reason. It's important that kids learn it too, I think - that you don't have to say 'yes' to every request to have/use your image.

My partner is a child protection officer, a team that was specifically set up after the murders of Jessica and Holly to work with all the home nations in the UK so information is shared. You have no idea of the horrific and horrible things that don’t make the news that they all deal with. The images may be altered and yes they may not know but instead of that happening, it can be prevented by not doing it in the first place no child should be used in that way either it’s going to effect them or not. I don’t blame these parents for wanting to keep their children safe.

I guess our default position is 'no'

Based on my experiences with schools, that's usually their default position too. Unless they had express consent from every family who has a child featured, no images would be put online. I'm guessing that's the case here too, based on the ops mention of consents.

We don't share any pictures of our DD on social media as we don't believe it's our right. In years to come our dd may look back and hate having so many pictures out there on the internet that once up can't be 100% removed.

Yes it's definitely the default for schools, and indeed for anyone working with children and young people.

I was just responding to the OP's question about what's the worst thing that I imagine could happen - I was trying to explain that this question wouldn't even be part of my decision-making process. I would need a reason to put them online, not a reason not to.

I don't put my child online as I believe it's their right to have privacy while growing up. Also as PP stated - I don't think my kids have anything to gain from their photos being online and therefore my default is no.

1. My child might want a serious job one day and not want an embarrassing video hanging around the internet.

1. Paedophiles harvest images from fb and schools etc (especially gym photos etc) to edit into porn. I would not want my child’s image in porn.

1. I don’t want my child to be used by some stranger in a meme eg this guy www.google.co.uk/amp/s/www.bbc.co.uk/news/amp/technology-55215859

1. Solidarity with adopted kids who are entitled to privacy without it being obvious who is concerned.

1. There is zero benefit to my child by putting it online and some potential negative consequences therefore no chance.

I give permission for nothing.

There was a case in France where a teenager took her parents to court and forced them to take down pictures of her from social media.

I think that we'll increasingly see more of this.

Take it from someone with older kids, it's not unusual for teens to ask parents to lock down their social media tighter or to take certain images offline. Posting pics of children could bite them in the arse (or deeply embarrass them) one day. Companies already check your social media before hiring, imagine future boyfriends or bosses finding old videos of you.

I think I was naive to think that it wasn't a massive deal and if I went back in time I'd keep my children's digital presence as close to zero as possible.

It’s a no from me too. It’s about controlling the audience. I do share pics on my fb but it is locked down to my actual rl friends, I have sown control over where they go. I don’t want my child’s images in the hands of ransoms, regardless of their intentions.

@Alexandernevermind

My friend is a foster parent and this would have cause huge issues. You end up with a handful of kids being pulled out, whilst the ones from "safe" backgrounds (not intended to insult) get to be showcased.

This.

Also it's basic consent issue - are the children involved old enough to meaningfully give consent for the videos to be seen by anyone with an internet connection, potentially indefinitely?